The Apprentice of Zephiel
by Story Time With Steph
Summary: [A Slayers Novel] When a sword-snatching prank goes horribly awry, the young Gabriev twins find themselves embroiled in a Mazoku plot. Now entrusted with the task of recovering one of Lei Magnus's manuscripts in an effort to rescue the Eternal Queen, these two underachievers are going to have to really step up their game if they want to put the kibosh on the Dark Lord's revival.
1. One

**1: A Mazoku in the Bush is Worth Two in the Cave**

* * *

 ** _"_** _VESTALIA!"_ My mother's voice, which struck terror into the hearts of dragons and bandit bosses alike, was leveled at me. I could tell she was more pissed off than usual, because she'd called me by my whole first name...and that's _never_ a good sign. (Vestalia was my great-grandmother's name. You can just call me Talia. Really _,_ I'd _strongly_ prefer if you did. But I digress.)

" _How many times_ do I have to tell you- _NO SWORDS IN THE HOUSE!"_

 _Gulp._

So maybe you're wondering: ' _Gosh Talia_ , what exactly did an upstanding young gal like you do to incur the wrath of the world's most powerful sorceress? _Surely_ having a sword in the house is not that big a deal.' To which I would reply, well, it's a _long_ story. I'd probably have to take you back to the time when I was three and I conjured up a golem at my friend's neighbor's cousin's birthday party. But for the sake of keeping this relatively brief, let's just take it back to about four minutes ago, shall we? Please file the following flashback under _Talia's Most Epic Adventures:_

* * *

The enemy swung down with an incredible force, enough to make me break a sweat as I blocked the blow with my longsword.

" _Ga ha ha_! It's a hundred years too early for you to oppose me, you so-called hero!" he taunted as I just barely managed to shake him off, diving to the left. "Give up this fool's errand now, and perhaps I shall spare your life!" He pointed at me as I recovered and prepared to strike another blow. Talk about rude!

"So long as I live and breathe, so long as the people of this great city have hope, I shall _never_ surrender to thee, Demon Beast Zanaffar!" I retorted. (Hey, an epic battle calls for epic dialogue, right? Not that I talk like that all the time or anything. It just seemed like the right moment for a little pomp and circumstance.) "I, the Swordswoman of Light, shall slay thee! _Hah_!" With that, I charged forward and swung with all my might-right into the hutch where Mom keeps the good china. Err...I mean, the forbidden trove of ancient regalia. Yeah.

And for some stupid reason—perhaps because the universe is out to get me—just as every last dish, saucer, and teacup of value shattered into billions of tiny pieces, the front door swung open to reveal a woman whose face quickly turned the same shade of crimson as her robes.

" _VESTALIA_!" My mother's voice, which struck terror into the hearts of dragons and bandit bosses...well, you get the idea. End flashback.

* * *

I weighed my options. I could skip town, dye my hair pink, change my name, and become a nun. I could lie and say the goldfish did it. _Or…_

" _He started it!_ " I hastily blurted out, fingering the other guilty party in the room. If I sang like a canary, I could get my sentence reduced or even be pardoned for my crimes, provided I was willing to throw my accomplice under the bus. Honesty is the best policy, right?

My partner in crime, however, was nowhere near where I'd last spotted him. I figured he must have already concealed his presence. His specialty is stealth after all, and hey, who can really blame the guy? He needs to weasel his way out from under Mom's ironclad death grip even more often than I do, if you can believe that. But while he might have been able to stump your average village kid (and admittedly, me) with the disappearing act, my mom saw through him in an instant. She peeled back the paisley curtains and found the other perp cowering there.

" _ALDEN_!" she barked.

"Oh hello, Mother dear! Back so soon? I was just dusting like you asked me to!" He lied through his teeth with a chicken-eating grin on his face, large beads of sweat pouring out of the back of his head. _Yeah right, Mister Let's Pick The Lock On Dad's Armoire And Play With His Stuff Because Mom Won't Be Back For At Least Another Hour! Way to leave your only sister high and dry!_

Or not. Alden might be good at hide-and-seek, but he needed a lot of work in the Powers of Suggestion Department. Mom's face contorted in a way that could only mean _I Am This Close to Actually Committing Filicide_ as she towered over him. " _Dusting,_ huh!?" she said pointedly, plucking a silver sword out of his hands. "With _this?"_

"I can explain!" Alden interjected. "It...was _really_ thick dust?"

I opened my mouth to say something, _anything_ to get myself out of the doghouse, as Alden crawled behind me from under the window.

"Save your breath, both of you!" Mom snapped. "Do you _realize_ those ceramics were worth a fortune!? They're irreplaceable! I'm so angry right now I- _I'm so angry I can't even-_!"

"...form full sentences?" I kindly offered, since Mom seemed to be having trouble with that at the moment. _Bad idea._ She grabbed both of us by the back of the collar. I saw my life flash before my eyes.

 _Lord have mercy, I'm too young to die!_

"You two are _beyond_ grounded!" Mom thundered. "Start packing your bags!"

"What!?" Alden and I whimpered in reply. _Oh no. Not that._ Any _thing but that._

Then my mom said the five words I have dreaded since the day I was born.

 _"You're going to your aunt's!"_

* * *

And thus our parents decided (without consulting us first) that we would spend the entire summer bussing tables and doing dishes at the restaurant where our aunt works as a waitress, at least until we could earn enough to pay Mom back for the damages. That might sound like a square deal to the uninitiated, but let me assure you, it's a fate worse than death. Because, you see, my Aunt is….

 _Shudder._

My Aunt is so strict, she makes Mom look like a pushover by comparison. And that's on a _good_ day.

So Alden and I were sent trudging down the long, long, _long_ road that leads to the Royal Capital of Zephilia-at the very butt crack of dawn, no less-under the ever-watchful eye of our dad, who happily took time off from work to accompany us on our journey towards a most certain demise. _Dad, you traitor! How could you do this to your beautiful daughter!?_ I thought miserably as I kicked a tin can down the weather-worn path through the woods that dotted the foothills.

"Come _on_ Dad, can't you beg her to reconsider?!" Alden pleaded, his eyes glistening with big, fat, ugly crocodile tears. "What about our camping trip? You can't just cancel it! We were supposed to spend a week together as rugged, manly men out in the wilderness with only our manliness to guide us!"

 _Excuse you?!_ **I** _was supposed to go on that camping trip too, you jerk!_

Dad smiled a huge, compassionate, infuriating grin. "There are other ways to prove you're a man, you know," he declared. "I bet you'll figure it out on your own sooner or later, but well...let's just say the road to becoming an adult is paved with hardships. Besides," he scratched his chin, "When your mom gets like this, there's really nothing I can do about it except wait until she's had a good meal or four and hope she gets distracted by something shiny..." _Thanks, O enlightened one._

Alden continued his feeble whining, as if he were the only one affected by all this. It's not as if _I_ didn't have anything better to do this summer, either, okay?! I was about to miss the most important moment of my young life-this was supposed to be the summer I _finally_ walked up to the fishmonger's son and said something besides ' _I'll take eight pounds of halibut and half a bucket of fish guts please.'_

...I mean, I would still _say_ it _,_ but then I was kind of thinking of casually throwing in something along the lines of 'Soooo, the grape festival is coming up, not like I'd be caught dead going there or anything, _ha ha_ ,' and he'd say 'Yeah, me neither, it's _so_ lame that we have to go every year, _ha ha ha_ ,' and subsequently we'd strike up a conversation about how uncool the whole shebang was and then decide that if our parents were going to make us go _any_ way, at _least_ we could go suffer through it together, and then we'd gorge ourselves on grape pies and dance under the light of the pale moon for hours and hours and then he'd carry me away on the back of a silver dolphin to his lavishly-furnished fishing villa to live happily, and wealthily, albeit somewhat stinkily, ever after.

 _Hey, it could happen! Never underestimate the power of my womanly wiles!_

….except that if I were _four days' walk_ away from home, my womanly wiles were of no use whatsoever. It kind of threw a monkey wrench into the whole plan. _Sigh. Goodbye, my summer of love._

Mercifully, Alden was jostled out of his whiny monologue by a rustling sound in the bushes. He instinctively reached for the dagger at his belt, but my dad put out a hand to stop him. If Dad wasn't sensing a threat, I figured it had to be an adorable bunny or, judging by the amount of rustling, maybe a deer or an exceptionally chubby raccoon…

Or a really loud and irritating kid, apparently.

" _Hiya folks!_ Step right up!" she shouted with enough volume to make a grown dragon go deaf in one ear. "Welcome to _Olivia's Magical Shop Of Wonders_!" she cheered, scattering a handful of squished confetti around for effect. "Wheee!"

 _Ugh, who says 'wheee' this early in the morning? Or_ ever, _for that matter?_

Judging from the exuberant tone of her voice alone, I immediately disliked her. She looked to be about nine or ten, her mousy hair pulled back with two shiny barrettes. Her hairstyle screamed 'I CUT MY OWN BANGS.' She wore green merchant's tunics and a red mantle, which were in pretty poor taste if you ask me. _Blech._ First of all, complementary colors like that are _so_ basic that they're a cliché. Second of all, I wouldn't wear a mantle if my life depended on it...I mean, they went out of style at _least_ a decade ago, and that's being generous. Although my mom still seems to think they're the fashion statement of the century. Don't try telling her they're not still in vogue, though, unless you're prepared to hear a 45-minute lecture about the many historical and practical uses of a good mantle. Believe me on this one, okay? You do _not_ want to get her started.

The badly dressed little kid continued shouting, " _Everything's_ extremely rare and valuable! Would you like some jewels, ma'am!? How about a real solid gold watch?"

 _Huh?_ I blinked. There wasn't a building around for miles. Was she seriously playing at being a shopkeeper in a backwoods place like _this_!? (Also, where did she get off calling a sweet, rosy-cheeked thirteen-year-old maiden such as myself _ma'am!?_ The nerve!)

 _She's_ got _to be kidding,_ I thought as she pulled out both sides of her mantle to reveal-and this honestly floored me- _actual_ valuables. A silver chalice imprinted with the royal seal of Saillune, a jewel-encrusted amulet worn by a high priest of Sairaag, a golden idol from the Temple of Sellentia, and an odd assortment of what appeared to be...designer watches. My jaw dropped. Not only was there a distinct possibility that this puny kid could be mauled by bears or trampled by boars in the middle of the forest, if she flaunted _that_ stuff around, she was likely to be accosted by-

"Bandits!" my brother shouted, and this time, both he and my dad readied their weapons. A pack of seven filthy brutes came wriggling out of the woodwork, drawn like seagulls to a fresh basket of bread. _Figures._ I shook my head at the sheer lunacy of it all, but never being one to turn down a featuring role in an action sequence, I decided to start chanting a spell.

 _"O spirits that move the winds,_

 _Gather in my hand_

 _And become my power."_

I hastily rattled off the incantation, or Chaos Words, so I could get to the Power Words, a.k.a. 'the good part.'

 _"Diem Wing!"_

An intense burst of air ripped through the trees, sending both branches and brigands hurtling upwards. _Thank you, thank you. Please file this heroic deed under Talia's Most Epic Adventures._

...Or not. The blast had _not_ _exactly_ missed the little girl and the two members of my immediate family, the latter of whom were now up in a tree.

" _Talia, you idiot_...!" my brother muttered in a pained voice. To make matters worse, an eighth guy showed up and snatched away the unconscious little girl we were trying to rescue. _Ugh, can I just crawl under that rock and die now? Thanks._

"He's getting away!" Alden shouted as he and Dad shambled down the tree trunk.

"Thanks, Captain Obvious!" I snapped back as the guy turned around to leave the scene. Now, I say _guy_ instead of _bandit,_ because this guy was no mere highwayman. He wore the deep red robes of a sorcerer, and as I opened my mouth to recite another incantation, he simply vanished, taking the girl in the cloak along for the ride. Which, by the way, is a feat that no mere human being, regardless of how much magic they're capable of, can possibly achieve.

"He's a Mazoku!?" my brother stammered, looking ready to cry big fat ugly _actual_ tears this time.

I'm sure you're at least familiar with the term _Mazoku_. But since you've probably never been unfortunate enough to run into one, let me level with you here. A Mazoku is bad news personified. They are the living embodiment of evil, the race of monsters that has vowed destruction upon our world.

"Yeah," my dad affirmed as he tightened the grip on his sword. "Looks that way."

To tell you the truth, it was the first time I'd ever seen a Mazoku in person, but when Alden was little, there was an incident with one that emotionally scarred him pretty badly. Usually I'm all for giving my brother grief, but hey, there's a line even _I_ don't cross. So, I've never really asked about the details of what happened that day. All I can tell you with certainty is, if my parents hadn't been there to save his hide at the time, I'd be an only child.

"Well, it's a shame about the kid, really, but I guess we're in over our heads, right guys?" Alden whistled and twiddled his fingers.

But Dad had already taken off in leaps and bounds towards what I could only assume was the direction the guy-the Mazoku, I mean-had gone off to. "Stay here," he called over his shoulder.

"Guess he's got this all figured out. We're counting on you, Dad! Good luck!" Alden clapped nervously. "We'll just, like, y'know, root for you from over here. We'll save you a sandwich!"

" _Like hell we will_!" I snapped back at my trainwreck of a twin.

"We're not gonna save him a sandwich?" Alden gasped. "That's cold, sis."

"I'm not _talking_ about the sandwiches, dumbass! Do you really want to just stand around here and _wait_ all day while Dad carves up a bunch of bad guys again? He's not getting all the glory _this_ time!" I resolved, yanking my reluctant sidekick along by the boots as he clawed uselessly at the ground.

My bro went kicking and screaming and desperately trying to talk me out of it the _whole_ way, which quite frankly was embarrassing for both of us. As we followed Dad's trail into the mouth of a cave, I clamped my hand over Alden's mouth in order to keep his gross sobbing from giving away our position.

It looked like the cave was the hideout of the group of thugs that had attacked us (or attempted to, anyway). I could smell something cooking on a rotisserie up ahead, and beyond that...the hair on the back of my neck stood up. Was this what Mom meant when she said she cold sense bloodlust?

I felt a tug on my arm and looked over my shoulder to see Alden quite literally shaking in his boots. _What happened to the whole bit with you being a rugged manly man out in the wilderness with only your manliness to guide you?_ I rolled my eyes. Up ahead, I could hear the sounds of clashing steel. My stomach turned, but without thinking I began to run towards the noise.

"Wait!" Alden hissed. It's a good thing I didn't ignore him as usual, because the next thing he said was "Dodge left, there's an arrow trap-"

And sure enough, as I dove to the side, eight arrows shot rapidly out of the darkness, narrowly missing turning me into a human pincushion. _Huh._ Well, I guess Mr. Manliness is good for _some_ thing _._

"Thanks. I'll take care of the offensive spells— you just cast Lighting and keep an eye out for traps, okay?" I ordered. Alden swallowed hard and nodded. As he cast the spell, I steered him ahead like a human lantern.

"Watch out for the spike pit under the rug there-good, now don't trigger that tripwire by the door-! Bandit at four o'clock!"

And so we went, with Alden surveying the surroundings for danger while I blasted bandits left and right, side stepping traps and all of the bandits Dad had already shish kabobed. A _freeze arrow_ here, a _fireball_ there...you know, the very basics of the basic elemental attack spells. Shamanism is just a hobby of mine, and this was the first time I'd used it in a practical sense. I mean, becoming a great sorceress is on my to-do list and all, but I usually have a lot of other things going on—like school, and my burgeoning social life.

I'd always assumed killing bandits was hard, based on how much Mom talked it up, but they're kind of like walking targets, really. They're big, dumb, slow and squishy. _Hey, I could get used to this..._

"Watch out for the falling boulders!"

"Tell me sooner next time! Geez!"

... _or maybe not. If I had to choose, I guess I'd kind of rather be enjoying my picnic lunch right now._

Before I could really even ponder just how bored these bandits had to be to make _this_ many stupid traps-or what they were trying to protect with them, for that matter- _or_ how Dad had managed to avoid all of them-I ducked into a side passage, waited for the boulders to miss us, and continued ahead. And then there we were, face-to-face with the rest of the band of not-so-merry thieves. They looked like they'd already been steamrolled. Dad and the captured girl were nowhere to be seen, but the pile of bandits strewn about the floor sure looked like his handiwork. He'd probably gone on ahead to rescue the little kid.

Then I felt a presence-the bloodlust I'd sensed earlier. The Mazoku in the red cloak materialized right in front of our eyes. If he noticed us at all, the kidnapper didn't acknowledge it. Instead, he picked up the injured body of what must have been the bandit leader by the throat and spoke to him in a kind of unearthly voice that made my blood run cold.

"My end of the bargain has been fulfilled. Now, give me that which I seek, brigand."

The bandit chief wheezed in indignation. " _Your end of the bargain!_?" he choked out. "Our hideout is destroyed and my men have been brutalized! There's no way I'd pay you now!"

" _Fool_ ," the Mazoku interjected in an icily calm voice. "I never said anything about preserving your pathetic property. Furthermore, you're lucky I agreed to your terms at all...there _are_ other ways of getting what I want."

"Heh...try your worst," the bandit boss smirked. _Uh-oh. Famous last words._

"I don't even _have_ to try," his assailant answered levelly. And with that, the bandit chief was toast. Without so much as a snap of the Mazoku's fingers, the man dissolved into dust. My brother, in all his manliness, fainted from shock. _Crap!_ _I never thought I'd say this, but I think I'd rather be back at home getting screamed at by Mom right now…!_

My mind reeled with the scene I'd just witnessed as I tried to piggyback the unconscious Alden back out the other way. My bro had been right-we were in _way_ over our heads. What was I thinking!?

My heart dropped as I rounded a corner and found myself face-to-face with the Mazoku Kidnapper Guy. _Damn, I forgot about the whole teleporting-anywhere-he-wants-to thing…! It's actually sort of hard to think straight when you're running for your life._

"I normally don't go out of my way like this, my dear, but I do need to stop for a quick morsel. The fear on that one is especially delicious," a long, spindly finger reached out towards my brother. "I'll need to cause _you_ a little more suffering to make it worth my while...nothing personal, you understand," the cloaked figure spoke, drawing back his hood for the first time since we'd encountered him.

Hey, here's a riddle for you. What has twelve eyes, wrinkly gold skin, and apparently wants to eat my feelings for lunch? No, it's not a mutant potato. _I definitely preferred him with his hood on!_

My hands shook as I prepared to launch a spell that could at least hit him from the astral side. _"E..Elmekia Lance!"_ I stuttered, letting loose with my strongest spiritual attack.

The Mazoku looked almost amused as the pillar of energy glanced his arm. "Is _that_ the best you can do?" he chuckled.

"No way!" I shot back, trying to sound indignant. _Err, yes way, actually. That is_ literally _the best I can do. Are you there, gods? It's me, Talia…_

"Hah. You amuse me, human girl. Let's play a little longer, shall we?" the guy laughed as he rapidly fired white-hot balls of energy out of his twelve gnarled fingers. I scurried to dodge them as they exploded like little fireworks in the darkness, and let me remind you that it was no easy feat with Alden dangling like a particularly drooly sack of bricks around my shoulders.

What was a life-or-death struggle to me was all some big game to the Mazoku, though. I threw up a wind barrier, knowing at this point I could only prolong the inevitable. But I couldn't hold it forever. My life started to flash before my eyes for the second time that week as I wondered why the beautiful (and their brothers) were doomed to die so young...

...wait, that wasn't my life flashing before my eyes, it was Dad's sword! He parried away the white energy as easily as he could swat a fly.

"I dunno what you're doing here, but you picked the wrong guy's kids to mess with, pal," Dad said, flashing a gallant grin.

"Give him hell, Dad!" I whooped, suddenly hopeful that I would live to eat that picnic lunch after all.

Okay, so here's the deal, since right now you may be thinking ' _Hold up, how can one guy with a sword hope to beat back a demon with immense astral powers that disintegrates people with his mind!?'_ And if you're thinking that, you haven't met my dad.

Now, since most Mazoku don't run into a first-rate swordsman wielding the Blast Sword-forged with Elven magic so strong it's known to cleave through boulders, brick walls, and _oh yeah, astral beings_ -the guy wasn't exactly expecting to have to defend himself when my dad made a beeline for him and lobbed him in half like a butter cake. With a scream not unlike the sound of nails on a chalkboard, the demon retreated to the Astral Plane from whence it came.

"Way to go, Dad!" Alden shouted in my ear. _Oh, look who's finally awake. Well, as long as he's okay..._ I made quick work of dropping my useless sibling on the ground.

Dad was at our side in an instant. "Are you both okay?" he asked, sheathing his sword.

"Yeah. Sorry Alden was useless," I shrugged, grinning from ear to ear.

"Uhh, me too," Alden smirked, brushing himself off and standing up slowly. "Sorry Talia fights like a paper bag."

" _What!?_ I'll show _you_ who fights like a paper bag!" I prepared to give my runt of a brother a knuckle sandwich when—

 _Clonk._ Dad's hands gently but firmly gripped Alden and I by the shoulders. Our heads bonked together awkwardly. _Ow._ "I told you both to wait in the forest," Dad said, sounding as though he'd just been forced to give away a whole box full of puppies. "Why did you come here?"

"I didn't even _want_ to! It was Talia's idea; she dragged me into this!" my thoughtful brother blurted. _His honesty is so charming. Remind me to punch him in the guts later._

Dad's eyes bore into me. My eyes bore into the ground. There were an awkward few moments of silence. _Huh, is that a mud stain on my shoe? That is suddenly_ really _interesting._

"Talia, listen," he started. Suddenly, something inside me snapped and anger flared up in my chest, though it didn't quite replace the nagging feeling of guilt.

"No, _you_ listen to _me_ , Dad!" I snapped back, pulling my arm away from him. "I took care of those bandits all by myself!"

"It's not the bandits that were the problem here."

" _But I beat them_! Without any help! Isn't that at least worth _some_ thing to you!?"

"Nothing is worth losing the two of you," Dad replied, unflinching. My anger quickly gave way to...even more guilt. My eyes sunk back to my feet. _Time to get acquainted with Mr. Mud Stain again. Oh, does he have a brother?_

"What if I hadn't made it back here in time? How would I ever face your mother then?" Dad argued. The question lingered heavily in the air, unanswered.

Sometimes, I think the look of betrayal in Dad's eyes whenever I do something wrong is way worse than any punishment of Mom's.

We continued the rest of our stroll through the cave in silence.

* * *

"Oh, hey guys. What took you so long?" Olivia the Horribly Dressed Kid greeted us as we stepped carefully into the deepest den of the cave to rescue her. She was nonchalantly eating a turkey leg and rooting through the buckets upon buckets of treasure the bandits had stashed away for a rainy day.

 _Okay, sure, so we risked life and limb to save you, a total stranger, from a gang of thugs and a mid-ranking Mazoku, and the best you can manage is an extremely casual 'Oh, hey guys, what took you so long!?' I am_ so _ready to be done with you_ and _this entire day now._

"Gross. At least we know she has an indoor voice now," I nudged my brother.

"Kids these days. No gratitude, I tell ya," Alden folded his arms across his chest.

Dad sidestepped a goblet as Olivia thoughtlessly tossed it aside, along with a string of pearls and a silver tiara. "Um...are you all right, young lady?" he asked, as courteous as he was confused. Olivia dove into a pile of rubies and began tearing through it.

"Oh, yeah, I'm pretty good. You guys look kind of beat up, though," she popped her head out of the mound, wrinkling her nose. "Thanks for coming to see me, but you can go home now. I'm really busy."

 _Wait, what!?_

"Did she hit her head when you blasted her with that spell?" Alden spoke to me out of the side of his mouth, raising an eyebrow. I scowled. _Hey, don't blame me! For all we know, she was like this to begin with!_

"That _is_ the same kid from before, right?" Dad puzzled as Olivia started crawling around under the chairs. "The one who was shouting and jumping all around trying to sell us that counterfeit stuff?" I could practically hear the gears in his head smashing together as he tried to reconcile the present circumstances with the recent past.

 _Wait, did he say counterfeit? I didn't even pick up on that. Dad's sharper than he looks sometimes._

"Hey, I resemble that remark!" Olivia shot back from inside a treasure chest. "Only about half that stuff is counterfeit, y'know. The gold watches are legit!" She chucked out handful after handful of silver coins, leaving them to clatter and roll around on the floor. Alden shrugged and tried to pocket some when Dad wasn't looking, but not before I smacked a few out of his hands to keep for myself. (I don't get much allowance at home, you understand. Mom's kind of a tightwad.)

"Anyway, the counterfeit items were good enough to fool those bandits, so I'm done with them. If you still want them, I guess I could give them to you for half price…" Olivia mulled, trying in vain to lift up a floorboard.

"Still sounds like a rip-off to me," Alden snorted. "Thanks but no thanks, short stuff. Now, if it were something more like a 90% discount, _then_ we'd be talking..."

"Hm. Sixty-five percent off, then?" Olivia haggled.

"Wait a minute, hold everything!" I cut in, less worried about the prices of the phony goods than the rest of Olivia's fishy story so far. "Did you just say you were _trying_ to fool those bandits? You got a death wish or something, shrimp!?"

Dad was just as flabbergasted as I was. "Now listen, young lady. I'm sure you have your reasons and all, but...playing around with guys like that is really dangerous, you know?" he explained. "You could have been seriously hurt." His eyebrows were practically knitting a sweater.

" _Huh?_ Oh, um..." Olivia's eyes lit up as realization dawned on her. " _Ohhh,_ you guys thought I was actually in danger, huh? Yeah, I guess I can see why you'd think that..." she rubbed her chin thoughtfully. _Well duh! Usually when a little kid is accosted by thugs and then carried off by a Mazoku to a secret den of thievery, it's not all sunshine and daisies and rainbows! Were you raised in a barn!?_

"Like I said, it's nice that you came to look for me, but getting kidnapped was all a part of the plan. I really don't need your help." Olivia explained boredly.

" _What?"_ the rest of us shouted in unison. Alden dropped the gold ingot he was stuffing into his knapsack in surprise. I caught it and tucked it away neatly into my sash.

"Hey, don't look so surprised! It was the easiest way to get in here. Those bandits had some things that belonged to my family. I was just getting them back, that's all," the half-pint waved the chewed-up turkey leg around for emphasis.

"So you just...went ahead and got yourself kidnapped by them. _On purpose_." I summed up incredulously.

"Sure, what could go wrong?" she shrugged. _Ugh! Quite a lot, actually!_ I fumed internally.

"Hah! Kid, you're all right," Alden gave the thumbs-up of approval. _Glad you've found someone on the same wavelength as you, weirdo._

Olivia probably missed the compliment, because by then she was waddling through a pile of stolen pottery. She shook jar after jar like a thing possessed as we looked on, perplexed. The pipsqueak plucked a magnifying glass out of her mantle and sighed, "Well, look, you guys...if you _really_ don't have anything better to do, can you help me look for my stuff?"

"What makes you think we don't have anything better to do!?" I seethed, thinking of my picnic lunch again.

"Of course we will," Dad said pointedly, patting me on the head. "We've got plenty of time to help you out. Right, guys?"

 _Ugh, speak for yourself, old man!_ My _schedule doesn't involve your fatal weakness for helping small children, animals and the elderly! This is the stupidest...wait, is that a pair of sapphire earrings over there? Maybe I'll just start searching in that direction, and if they should happen to accidentally fall into my pocket, I'm sure no one will miss them…_

"What exactly are you looking for, anyway?" Alden asked, rolling up his sleeves and heading straight for the weapons pile. _Yeah, no ulterior motives there._

"Right, could you tell us more about them? It would be really helpful to know what your missing things look like," Dad said agreeably, squatting down to be on eye level with the half-pint halfwit.

Olivia obliged us with a description. Sort of. "Well...there's four of them, see? They're about this big…" she made a motion to indicate an object about the size of a biscuit, "They're different colors, and they're really shiny," she nodded matter-of-factly.

 _That could describe literally anything in this room! How is that even remotely helpful!?_

"Oh, I see," Dad smiled, catching me off guard. _What, exactly, do you see!? Because I'm still kind of lost here._ "So...something like this thing, then?" he asked, reaching down to pick up an obsidian stone set in a silver broach. He presented it to the brat, who squealed like a delighted little piglet.

"Wow, that's exactly it! Thanks mister!" Olivia clasped her hands together gratefully, then plucked the broach out of Dad's hands.

 _Wait, what the hell, Dad!? Was that just dumb luck, or do you know something I don't here?_

"This is one of my Grandpa's treasures. He gave it to me before he died," Olivia explained, tucking the broach safely into her mantle. "I'm responsible for keeping them safe."

"Oh, I see," dad nodded, seeming thoughtful. "So that's why it's so special to you, huh?" he smiled. "I understand."

Olivia turned to my brother and I. "There are three more still in here! Come on, chop chop! We've gotta find them!" she urged. _Oh come on,_ _I did_ not _sign on to be this little brat's errand girl!_

"Treat your seniors with some respect!" I muttered as I rifled through some doubloons. It was going to be a long day.

* * *

It took us nearly two and a half hours, but somehow we managed to locate the rest of Olivia's lost stuff. The other three items she was looking for were part of a matching set with the broach, cast in the same silver plating but with differently colored gemstones in each. Their value must have been sentimental, I thought, because there were other treasures in the room that would fetch a much higher market price.

As I begrudgingly handed Olivia the last of them-a crystal one-she jumped up and down like the overly excited little dog she was.

"Well, that's that. I'm starving," Alden complained, whipping out his own picnic lunch.

"Can't you even wait until we get outside, you glutton!?" I scolded. I was sick of this cave already. A little fresh air sounded pretty good right about now. "Tell him to wait, Dad!" I whipped around to look for my father, who had been standing guard.

Dad didn't answer me. He was on edge, his sword drawn. "Nobody move," he whispered. _Oh, what now!?_ I wondered crankily. _I thought we took care of all the bad guys!_

"I will…meet my objective…" said a scratchy voice from the darkness. "No matter the cost…"

"I will not fail my master…" said another, "No matter the cost…"

What appeared next was pretty gruesome, so sorry in advance if you're squeamish. Two of the bandits we'd beaten earlier shambled towards us, but they weren't quite their regular, lovable, greasy old selves. Their arms and legs moved unnaturally in their joints, their flesh expanding and contracting oddly with each step. Each one had six beady eyes and a long, golden, spindly arm. Almost like…

"They fused with the Mazoku?!" Alden gulped, seeming faint again.

I turned around and gave him a good smack across the face. "Keep it together, Alden!" I warned. "If you pass out for the second time today, so help me, I am _NOT_ lugging your sorry ass around again!"

"But he almost killed us before-and now there're TWO of him!" He shook like a leaf, but tried concealing his presence behind a barrel. I suppose I should do him a solid and remind you now that he's not usually _this_ much of a chicken in battle. It's just that the whole "Mazoku Incident" of his childhood was apparently so traumatic, he gets paralyzed every time we face off against one. I was starting to suspect that his decision to train himself as a rogue wasn't solely based on sneaking away from Mom.

However, there were a few new circumstances that gave us the upper hand this time. First and foremost, we had Dad with us. He was doing a pretty good job of blocking attacks from two enemies at once. Also…

"Chill out for a second, would you, bro? Look, quantity isn't necessarily quality in this case. He's split himself in half, so each body has roughly half the power he had before. Plus he's got physical bodies now since he combined with the bandits, see? First of all, that negates his ability to teleport. Second of all, we can damage him with spells or weapons that attack him physically. For example—

 _"Stop talking and_ do _something!"_ Alden flailed. "Dad's in trouble!"

Now, I had read about all this in a book from Mom's library recently, so I was kind of eager to show off my newfound knowledge of magical theory. But I guess there's a possibility that _maybe_ it wasn't the best time for an impressive show of my above-average intelligence.

"Hey, Talia? You know that spell you've been practicing behind the garden shed at night? The one you thought you were keeping a secret from me and Mom?" Dad grimaced as the two half demons flanked him on either side, each one assaulting him with the exploding orbs of energy. Though he dodged with relative ease, he had to be on the defensive instead of the offensive this time, since one misplaced thrust could leave him open for an attack from behind.

My ears turned pink. "Will I get in trouble if I say _yes_?" I asked cautiously.

"Just do it!" Alden exclaimed irritably as he tossed me a nearby rapier from the weapons pile. "Use this."

"Oh, you can use magic too, Big Sis?" Olivia gazed up at me, wide-eyed. "I wanna see!"

Well, _finally!_ A chance to show them my real power. I ignored how annoyingly chummy Olivia was being with me and twirled the rapier around a bit. "Stand back kid, I'm about to knock your socks off," I smirked.

Olivia joined my bro by the barrel, looking on curiously as I scrawled a quick magic circle on the ground with the blade. A line here, a curve there, rinse and repeat, _et voila._ A little lopsided, but it was the best I could do in a pinch.

I'm actually not the best at drawing, and that was why I'd been practicing at home, alone, in the middle of the night, behind the shed...well, and maybe I had a few other reasons to keep it a secret—but I guess I hadn't covered my scribbles well enough to really hide them from Mom. Oh, well, it kind of worked out in the end, anyway.

 _"Gaia Graze!"_ I chanted. From out of the magic circle sprung a Brass Demon, ready to follow my every command. I passed the rapier on to him.

"Okay, Brass Demon, get in there and cover Dad's back! And try to take out those two goons while you're at it," I ordered. All that was left now was to stand back and admire my handiwork as he slashed his way to victory.

"Oh…" Olivia cocked her head. "So that was your plan?"

"Yeah, now it's two-on-two and Dad can focus on offense again," I explained. "Pretty genius, right?" I said with a flourish.

"Not really," Olivia remarked, creasing her brow. "Your Brass Demon's kind of slow," she pointed out. "He can't even fly. I don't think he'll be able to do much except maybe act as a meat shield…"

 _Slow?! SLOW?! Well who died and made you an expert?! I mean, I guess he_ is _a little chunky for a brass demon, but beggars can't be choosers, right?!_ "Oh yeah?!" I retorted. "I'd like to see _you_ do better, pipsqueak!"

Olivia shrugged. "Oh, okay then," she replied with a totally straight face. "You might want to put up a wind barrier first though."

 _Um, what?! Hasn't this kid ever heard of being rhetorical?!_ "Hey, wait…!" I called out to her as she walked headfirst into the thick of the battle. _Oh no...am I gonna get blamed for manslaughter?!_ _I can't watch…_

Olivia raised her hands over her head. I buried my face in my palms. Then...

 _"Thou who art darker than night…"_

 **What what** ** _what?!_** My hands flew to my hair. My jaw dropped so fast it nearly fell out of my head. _That spell...is she serious?!_

 _"Thou who art redder than flowing blood…"_

An immense power began to gather between Olivia's outstretched hands. _Holy Mother of Gaav, she_ _ **is**_ _serious! Is...is this real life?!_ Dad's head turned sharply when he heard what was going on behind him. _Oh no...Dad! If he gets caught up in this…_

"Brass Demon, get Dad out of there!" I shouted. And the Brass Demon obeyed, picking Dad up like a sack of potatoes. He ran like a bat out of hell and into the safety zone behind us, flapping his tiny, useless wings behind him.

 _"Thou through whom time flows, I call upon thy exalted name…"_

Now that I knew it was getting serious, I put up a shield to protect us from the potential fallout.

" _I pledge myself to darkness..."_

Part of me wanted the kid to be full of crap so I could laugh in her face later, and part of me was morbidly curious to see what would happen if she succeeded.

 _"Let those fools_

 _Who would oppose us_

 _Suffer destruction_

 _By the power we two possess!_ "

Yep, this was happening all right. Up until now, there was only one person I knew who was capable of pulling off a spell of this complexity... _the_ single most destructive spell castable by a mere human being. Originally known as the _Dragon Slayer,_ it was developed over 1,000 years ago by the sage Lei Magnus, whose soul contained a fragment of the Dark Lord Shabranigdu, the most powerful of all Mazoku. In fact, the spell draws power from Shabranigdu himself. Pretty scary stuff, right?

...yeah, I got that sweet bit of info out of one of Mom's books, too. Sorry for the massive info dump. It's likely you already knew that, huh? Anyway, we now return to your regularly scheduled explosion.

 _"Dragon Slave!"_ Olivia finished spectacularly.

 _Kaboooooooom!_ The ensuing blast ripped through the cave around us, sending debris careening hundreds of feet in the air. It tore the half demons, the bandits, and everything else in the hideout to shreds. My shield barely managed to keep us stabilized. At the end of it all, we found ourselves standing at the edge of a crater where there had once been a cave, a forest, and a hillside.

 _Damn._ Just who the hell _was_ this kid?

"You, you…! You _idiot!"_ I karate chopped Olivia with all the strength my addled body could muster. "Don't you realize you could've gotten us all _killed?!_ You can't just fire off a Dragon Slave anywhere you damn well please! Even with a protective barrier up, it's _still_ the most dangerous spell in all Black Magic!" I grappled with the air and shouted as I nearly exploded from the sheer impossibility of it all.

"Yeah, I know," Olivia rubbed her head gingerly. "My Grandpa taught it to me," she shrugged.

"Whoa... _dude!_ That was _wicked_ awesome!" Alden shrieked, staggering out from behind the barrel to shake Olivia's hand aggressively. "You totally rule, Olivia."

"Thanks," Olivia smiled at her feet bashfully.

" _Don't encourage her, you dolt!"_ I screamed.

The Brass Demon waddled forward and gently placed Dad down next to me, then shuffled as far away from Olivia as he comfortably could. It was a bit awkward. Dad sheathed his sword. He looked at the crater. He looked at Olivia. He looked at the crater again. He looked back at Olivia.

"So…" he shoved his hands in his pockets and sighed deeply, looking a few years older than when we'd left home in the morning. "Who wants ice cream?"

"Yay!" cheered Olivia and Alden.

" _Whatever,"_ I glowered.


	2. Two

**2: This Looks Like a Job for Another Waitress**

* * *

The more I thought about it, the more it grated on my nerves. It shouldn't have been possible. For a little kid, and a pretty dull-witted one at that, to have access to _that_ caliber of magic...well, I don't think I need to explain to you how stupidly _dangerous_ it seemed.

And it was _demeaning!_ She'd showed me up- _me!_ The only daughter of the most famous (or infamous, depending on who you ask) magic user this side of the Demon Sea!

...But maybe that was my problem right there. I mean, I _guess_ if you wanted to nitpick, you could say that up until that point I'd been relying pretty heavily on my parents' reputation to carry me through life. It's just, I'd always figured that once I got out there in the so-called "Real World," I'd be kicking butts and taking names like it was second nature. There _was_ no other option; greatness was in my blood! That's what I had thought.

But apparently, I had thought wrong. It sickened me to think of it, but when I was up against that Mazoku, my best spell was useless. _I_ was useless. If Dad hadn't swooped in, my bro and I would have been that potato's lunch. And to add insult to injury, my secret spell and my strategy for getting rid of the half demons had meant zilch in the end. Sure, Olivia's method was what you might call _overkill,_ but you couldn't argue with those results.

My blood boiled as I relived the explosion in my mind for the billion and twelfth time. I didn't want to have to resort to thinking of a grade school dropout as a serious rival. But what choice did I have? And so, staggering under the weight of all kinds of existential questions, I vowed that as soon as I arrived in Zephiel City, I would storm the Sorcerer's Guild, demand to be made a member, and start learning how to kick the Real World's butt in earnest.

...At least, that's how I planned it, but _that_ business was all over three weeks ago. Reality instead dictated that I be forced to endure a different set of trials for which I was in no way prepared. In other words...

 _Sigh…_

The "Real World" was, in fact, kicking _my_ butt.

"Welcome to Realancer's Restaurant. We are _so_ glad you chose us today," I deadpanned to the family of dopey-looking tourists gathered around the table before me. "My name is Talia and I'll be your waitress this evening. If you need anything at all, _please_ don't hesitate to annoy me-"

My aunt shot me a look from across the restaurant that could have killed a troll.

"I mean _ask_ me _! Tee hee!"_ I forced a smile, my hands trembling wildly as I reached for the pen stuffed in my frilly apron. "Can I get you folks started with some appetizers and drinks?"

I was living in Hell. Every morning, I got up at five o'clock to sweep and mop the floors, polish the silver, and set the tables. We opened for breakfast at eight and served lunch and dinner until ten at night, although the clientele seemed to think that the sign out front read ' _Seven O'Clock Until Whenever!'_ Every evening, after the last of them had finally cleared out, I scrubbed the pots and pans and took out all the garbage. Oh, and there was a strictly enforced "No Sitting" rule for trainees. And I was expected to perform all of the laborious, menial tasks they gave me with a smile.

But the absolute _worst_ part of it? The crazy getup I had to wear. Who wants to work themselves to the bone looking like a frilly disaster? It was ludicrous! It looked like a bonnet and a corset mated and had an ugly baby, and then that baby had vomited on a magenta tablecloth, which was then forced onto me. And it was a little too baggy in the chest area, so it was definitely a hand-me-down…

 _I never asked for this!_ I was expecting kitchen duty, sure. However, I thought that I'd have been spared this kind of public humiliation by my own family. _Nope!_ Here I was, wearing the most heinous dress ever constructed by human beings and taking orders from a bunch of sweaty dorks wearing souvenir cornucopias on their heads. _Whoever devised such a plan of torture must truly be evil. Wait, I bet this was what Mom had planned all along...! She is_ so _getting a newt in her tea next time she comes by to gloat._

On the other hand, Alden seemed to be having the time of his life. He was charming the doily off some old lady at Table Four. "And _then_ I said to the guy, whatever you do, _don't smell that ogre!_ Hahaha..."

'Hoh hoh! Oh, Alden my dear, you are _sooo_ delightful!" the old bat cooed, wiping her tears of laughter away with an embroidered handkerchief. "You simply _must_ meet my granddaughter!"

 _Oh yeah, real knee slapper, Bro. It was funny the first seventy-eight times I heard it._

Meanwhile, my customers were just a barrel of fun. "Oi you, scrawny girl-can I get another pint!?" a depressing-looking woman whined as I passed her on my way to retrieve the drink order. She didn't so much as bother to lift her head off the table.

"I think you've had enough, Mrs. Frampton," I sighed.

"Miss, where's my sausage sampler? I've been waiting twenty minutes!" someone else complained.

"The kitchen's backed up," I snapped. I pushed open the swinging double doors to the aforementioned kitchen, where the cook was leisurely stirring a pot of gravy and humming to himself as he read a copy of _The Shrine Maiden's Handbook._

"Get it together, B.D.! The customers are getting on _my_ case because _you're_ slacking off in here!" I jabbed a finger into his big aproned chest. He whimpered and fluttered his tiny green wings uncomfortably.

Oh yeah, so remember the useless brass demon I'd summoned before? Somehow, he was still here. I know, it's weird, because usually the longer something brought about by magic sticks around, the more likely it is to deteriorate. Or, when something's been summoned, as in the case of our curly-horned, winged friend here, it eventually gains free will and goes off to do its own thing. Not so much with this guy. He just sort of kept following us around. My aunt's shift manager-scary lady, pray you never meet her-put him to work in the kitchen so he wouldn't frighten the customers. Alden had started calling the brass demon "B.D." for short. _I know, I know_! But what do you expect from the guy who named our goldfish _Goldy_ and our cat _Kitty?_

Anyway, B.D. handed me the plate of assorted sausages and waved me out of the kitchen. I trudged over and plopped it down in front of Mr. Supreme Fussbudget.

"Thank you for waiting, _sir,_ " I grated my teeth as I smiled.

"Hey, where's the bockwurst!? I _specifically_ said I wanted extra bockwurst, you nitwit!"

...and on and on and _on_ it went. The moron parade just kept coming. And then, every weekday at exactly 4:15…

 _Oh joy rapture, here it comes…_

"Miss Luna!" a burly, nearly middle-aged redhead with a bad goatee kicked open the door. He wore mercenary's clothes and a had a clueless expression permanently plastered to his face. His arms were filled to the brim with cabbages as he blundered in my Aunt's direction. "As you can clearly see, I purchased exactly 20 heads of cabbage from the general store just like you asked me to, so I can prove that I'm serious this time! Your mom says hi, by the way," he announced himself. "Now, come duel me like you promised!" he shouted dramatically, pointing at her. This caused a large number of the cabbages to slip out of his grasp and roll around on the floor. "And _this_ time, I won't go easy on- _eep!_ "

He stopped dead in his tracks as my aunt whipped her head around and met him with an icy glare. It was hard to look intimidating in this stupid outfit, but Aunt Luna had it down to a science. Her eyes looked especially menacing under the long shadow of her frilly headdress. Her mouth tightened into a thin line. Her fist curled around the butter knife she was holding. Another cabbage toppled out of Lantz's arms as he panicked. It rolled out of sight and into the kitchen, where B.D. slipped on it and dropped the bucket of water he was carrying. I winced at the crash and splash that resulted.

"Lantz," my aunt said to the man, a quiet fury brewing in her voice. "I told you not to bother me while I'm on my shift."

"Er…"

"And pick those cabbages up before I get angry. Wasting food is unforgivable," she briskly pointed the butter knife at him.

Nervously, he saluted. "Yes ma'am!" he squeaked as the other half of the cabbages tumbled downward. Lantz shrieked and scurried to pick them all up. The customers were starting to gossip about him. In a moment of weakness, my pity moved me to help him wrangle the runaway greens.

"Heya, Cutie Pie! How goes the family business?" He winked at me. _Ugh. Must resist urge to throw vegetables…_

Not feeling too eager to exchange pleasantries, I got straight to the point. "I'm getting you a box for these," I told Lantz, my patience already paper thin from having to deal with his ilk all day, every day. "If you're going to be hanging around here until Aunt Luna's shift is over, _you'd better order something_ , got it!?"

"No problem!" Lantz smiled nervously as I slammed a crate between us. He started stacking the loose cabbages inside. "But, uh...to tell you the truth…"

 _Oh God, here we go again…_

"I'm going broke from buying all these cabbages, so, uhm, y'know...do you think you could do your Uncle Lantz a solid and spot me a few coppers?"

And I helped him out for the second time that day, because I'm a freaking saint. "You're paying me back. _With interest._ You know I'll tell my mom on you if you try to weasel out, right?" I warned, plopping a handful of coins into his empty palm.

"Hey, c'mon! I swear on my honor as a merc, all right!?" He laughed nervously. Seeing a grown man become increasingly uncomfortable at the mere thought of receiving one of Mom's beatings was actually kind of a reward on its own. But don't think for a second I was lying about making him pay me back! I don't mess around when it comes to money.

He ordered fried fish, the cheapest thing on the menu. Big surprise there.

" _Bon appetit,"_ I said, setting the steaming basket down. "No free refills on the water. And _do not_ forget to tip me this time!"

"Okay, okay!" Lantz winced. "Take it easy! Actually," he leaned in, "if you'd like to double that tip, you could help me out with this little mission I've got cooking…"

I crossed my arms. "Yeah? I'm listening, but make it snappy. My other customers are still paying a lot more than you."

"Right. Well…" he lowered his voice conspiratorially, "It's...do you think you could figure out a way to get rid of your aunt's sword?" Lantz finished timidly, twiddling his thumbs.

"You want me to _what!?"_ I nearly dropped my tray. "Whatever you're paying me for _that_ , it's not enough," I reasoned. Aunt Luna probably valued her enchanted sword more than she valued life itself. She was gifted with the incredible ability to channel her will into objects, and by that strength of will alone she could easily slice a plasma dragon in half with a kitchen knife. With that enchanted sword in her hands, though, she'd probably be a match for the Dark Lord himself, should he ever rear one of his seven ugly heads again. At least that's how I figured it.

" _Shhh!_ Keep it down, would ya!?" Lantz hissed. "Don't misunderstand me here, it's not like you'd need to get rid of it forever! Just...if you could make sure it gets, ya know, _misplaced_ for a few hours…"

" _Why?"_ I grilled him like the big, dumb zucchini he was. "What are you planning?"

"Look, as long as she has that thing, there's no way I'll ever beat her in a duel!" he protested. "I can't keep losing for the rest of my life! My pride as a man is at stake here!"

It was true. Every day, Lantz challenged my aunt to a duel. Every day, she made him go buy groceries from Granddad and Meemaw's store and then she proceeded to beat the living snot out of him within 20 seconds. I was starting to think Lantz _enjoyed_ having his ass handed to him. _Weirdo._

I plopped onto the chair across from him, already mentally exhausted from the whole exchange, but…

" _ **NO SITTING!"**_ the shift manager screamed at me from behind the bar, smacking her fist on the counter so hard I could feel the chandelier shake. _Crap, I forgot she was here!_ I stood back up again, and for some reason, so did Lantz, looking more uncomfortable than ever. We resumed our conversation, with Lantz grabbing his basket of fish and following me into the kitchen. B.D. was mopping, but he grunted out what I assumed was a quick 'hello' to our freeloading associate.

"So, this is all just about your stupid manly pride, huh?" I raised an eyebrow. "What _is_ it with you guys, anyway?"

"Well, it's a bit more complicated than that…" Lantz looked up at the ceiling, munching on some battered fish thoughtfully.

"Uh-huh." I leaned on the counter. "So let's assume that by some miracle I manage to separate her from the sword for a few minutes, and then by some _even bigger_ miracle, you manage to beat her in a duel. What then?"

"Well, isn't it obvious?" Lantz fidgeted. "I'd confess my love to her and ask for her hand in marriage!"

 _Hah! In your dreams, pal._ I snorted. "Have you tried just asking her out on a date like a _normal_ person?" I rolled my eyes.

"Nope. She's always too busy," Lantz replied matter-of-factly through a mouthful of chips. _Gross! Say it, don't spray it! "_ Besides, if I know one thing, it's that she won't go for a guy who's weaker than her," he added. (He had a point there.) "So I'll have to prove the strength of my feelings by defeating her!" He placed his hands on his hips and puffed out his chest.

" _Way_ easier said than done," I countered. He deflated a little. Look, I wasn't _trying_ to rain on his weird little love parade. I'm just a realist. "I mean, _think_ about it. How long have you been trying to win against her?"

"I dunno, about three years? Maybe four?" Lantz shrugged. "I've sort of lost track, to be honest."

"And you never once, in that _entire_ timespan, thought to yourself, ' _Maybe I should figure out a 'Plan B' for my life_?'"

"Nope! Rule Number One of Love, kid: _There is no Plan B,_ " Lantz swaggered.

"That's a terrible rule," I pointed out. (Please, I'm begging you, _do not under any circumstances_ start following Lantz's Rules of Love. If you ever think Rule Number One is a good idea, please refer back to the fact that the guy who made it up is forty years old and single.)

"You'll understand when you're older," Lantz replied with a smug, condescending look on his face. "Actually, maybe you've already been bitten by the love bug at your age, huh?"

Visions of the fishmonger's hot son danced through my head.

"Ah- _hah!_ " the mercenary shouted triumphantly. "So you _do_ know what I mean, right? Talia, you sly dog you! You need any advice, you come right to me, got it?"

" _Shut up!"_ I retorted. "Unlike you, I have my whole life ahead of me to figure that stuff out. And I _do not_ need your help! _Capisce?"_

"Sure, sure," he said with a wave of his hand. "You say that _now_ , but just wait. Anyway, though, here's the deal. You sneak off with the sword somewhere. I get to fight your aunt fair and square. You bring the sword back when we're done, and I'll make sure you make a little money under the table. Miss Luna and I will live happily ever after. And then, uh... _oh yeah!_ you and I will be family, right? Hey, lucky you! You'll have the coolest uncle in town!"

 _Yeah, I can just see Mom's glowing approval now._ "I'm not agreeing to this," I squinted.

" _Pleeeease?_ I'll do your dishes for a whole week,"Lantz pleaded.

 _Okay, I can work with this._ "Make it two weeks. And you have to take out the garbage, too," I insisted. Hey, if he was serious about all this love stuff, he'd have to be prepared to get his hands dirty for it, right?

"Done deal," Lantz agreed, shaking my hand firmly.

"Pleasure doing business with you. Welcome to the family, Uncle Lantz," I smiled.

 _Sucker._

* * *

When I told Alden about Lantz's plan to have me abscond with Aunt Luna's sword, he was surprisingly cavalier about the whole thing.

"Oh man, is _that_ what he thinks!? That is just _too_ truly hilarious," he chortled, wiping away a tear of laughter from his eye. "Even with Brenda out of the picture, he's not gonna last more than 45 seconds against Auntie in a fight," he rubbed his hands together. (Brenda, in case you were wondering, is the name of the enchanted sword...or, at least, that's what Aunt Luna wanted to call it. And everyone was too terrified of her to question it.) "This is gonna be _good._ Do you think we should sell tickets to the duel?"

"So...does that mean you'll help me out, then?" I replied, a little surprised.

He shrugged. "Why not? I could use some practice. We haven't pulled off a good heist since the Atlas City Cheese Festival Incident."

I winced at the memory. " _Ugh_ , don't remind me about that. I smelled like limburger for a whole month," I lamented, nearly gagging just thinking about it.

"Ah the good old days…" Alden grinned. "But anyway, I kind of owe Lantz one, so yeah, I'm all in."

That honestly made me curious. "What do you owe _him_ for?" I asked.

Alden suddenly became flustered. "He gave me some really good advice," he said furtively, avoiding my eyes. "That's all."

...I didn't push the subject, but _man,_ he must have been really desperate to solicit advice from _that_ guy. Geez.

"Anyway," he continued, "we need a plan here. Here's what I'm thinking…"

Despite his lack of good judgement in other areas, I have to say, my bro's plan for getting the sword was pretty ingenious. Though it would involve a little bit of acting on my part. We hammered out the details on our breaks, but the bottom line was that we would need to strike during the one time of day that Brenda was not on Aunt Luna's person: bathtime.

Ever since our aunt had moved out of Meemaw and Grandad's, she had been renting an apartment right above the restaurant. Every night at 7:00, she clocked out and left us under the shift manager's supervision. By 8:00, she was upstairs in the bath, her clothes were folded in a tidy little pile, and her sword was propped up against the door in case of an emergency. That's where Alden's stealth training came in.

He'd only have a few minutes to do it, since the boss lady wasn't a big fan of long bathroom breaks, but Alden figured it wouldn't be hard to sneak in through the back window to replace the real Brenda with a convincing replica. ("Why don't you just use the front door?" I asked him. "You _do_ have a key, don't you?" To which he 'tsk tsk'd' and replied "No way, Sis. A great thief _never_ uses the front door!" _Whatever_.)

Anyway, then it would be my turn. My job was twofold. _Phase_ _One_ : Create a distraction and slip away in the ensuing pandemonium. _Phase Two_ : Retrieve the sword from my bro and make a clean getaway.

Friday afternoon rolled around, and we were ready to set the plan in motion. Aunt Luna headed up for the night. I watched the clock carefully. Then, when a few minutes had passed, I opened my coin purse to release... _the beast._

It was nature's most diabolical creation, known to strike fear into the hearts of kings and peasants alike as it traveled by land and air to sate its monstrous appetite. More ancient than the dragons themselves, with more built-in survival skills than even a troll, my secret weapon was capable of living for over a week without its head and could hold its breath underwater for the better part of an hour. It was hideous; it was disgusting; it was absolutely brilliant.

All I had to do now was call attention to it.

" _C...C...C...COCKROACH!"_ I shrieked, pointing at the critter as it scampered up the wall.

And just like that, the place erupted in chaos. Grown men and women leapt up onto their chairs in fright. People dove to cover their food as the beast spread its wings. Somebody knocked over a pitcher of water, which shattered into a hundred little pieces. Babies started to cry. People started tripping over each other in a vain attempt to escape.

Even the usually fearsome shift manager was in a panic. " _Somebody kill it!"_ she howled from beneath a barstool.

 _Perfect,_ I thought. _And now, for the performance of a lifetime._

" _Eek!_ I can't take this anymore!" I staggered over to the table where Lantz was gnawing on a drumstick. "Getting woozy," I wobbled, dropping my tray and pretending to pass out on the floor in front of him. I winked at him on the way down.

"Oh!" Lantz snapped out of his food coma, ready to play his part. "Um, I'll save you." he delivered his line, scooping me up in his arms and making a break for the back door. _Ugh, talk about lousy delivery. I sure hope they bought it._

"Shift manager, I'm taking her to her grandparents'!" he shouted at the boss lady, barreling his way through the Friday night crowd as I groaned in fake agony. "This is no place for a delicate young girl!" _Okay, now he's getting into it. That's good._

Within a minute, I was outside. Ah, the sweet taste of fresh air and freedom. Lantz set me down at the rendezvous point below Aunt Luna's kitchen window, where Alden was supposed to lower the sword to me. It looked like he wasn't in position yet, though.

We waited in silence as the bedlam in the dining room continued to unfold. I think I heard B.D. _actually_ faint. Now that I thought about it, I guess I _might_ have forgotten to mention to him about the whole cockroach thing. _Whoops_.

Finally, my brother's face appeared at the window. He looked a bit pale.

"What took you so long?" I hissed as he lowered Brenda the sword gently down in a white linen sheet.

"This thing's freaking _heavy!"_ he complained, indicating the blade. "Plus I forgot about Spot," he answered in an agitated whisper. "I gotta get outta here before the sleeping spell wears off..." he looked around shiftily.

Oh yeah, Aunt Luna had a guard dog, didn't she? Well, not so much a _dog_ as a half-wolf half-troll, actually.

I caught Brenda gingerly by the hilt. "It's not heavy at all," I remarked, tossing the linen back up to Alden, who used it to climb quietly out the window. "Do you even lift, Bro?" I teased. Alden shot me a look that was equally confused and offended as he stuck the landing.

"Whatever. Just take it and get it out of here for a few hours, okay?" he urged me, stuffing the sheet into his pouch. "It's time for Phase Three," Alden rolled up his sleeves and took off his shoe.

"What's Phase Three?" Lantz and I asked in unison.

"I come back from my 'bathroom break' and bust up the cockroach," he explained, brandishing the shoe. I bowed my head solemnly. _Goodbye, noble beast. Your sacrifice will not be in vain._

"You gonna be okay in there by yourself, little bro?" Lantz asked, genuinely concerned.

"Yep. Time to go be a hero. This one's for the ladies," Alden flexed for emphasis.

"Oh, _nice!"_ Lantz nodded emphatically and gave Alden a high five.

"Be careful," I told Alden. "Don't pull a muscle or whatever." Before taking off, I turned to Lantz. "Just pay me in the morning. It's all you now. Go get her, tiger!" I smirked. He was about to have his dreams of love crushed _and_ get stuck doing my chores for two weeks, so I had resolved to be nice to him for the time being. I know, I know, I'm too soft.

"Take care!"

"See ya!" my cohorts bid me adieu.

And with that, I took off into the night, sword in hand.

* * *

Halfway to my grandparents' shop-where I planned to safely stash Brenda in a crate of oranges-I ducked down a narrow alleyway that cut the corner between the milliner's and the dressmaker's. It wasn't really that great of a shortcut or anything. I just get a kick out of seeing fancy hats. _Hah, that one has a bird's nest on it!_

Away from the bars, inns, and taverns, it was actually a quiet evening in the commercial district. The bronze glow of the enchanted street lamps flickered and gently illuminated the glass display windows that lined the cobblestone lane. Kind of a romantic ambience, if you liked that sort of thing. Whatever you wanted to call it, it was really a nice night for a stroll.

The keyword here is " _was."_

Suddenly, a scream broke the silence of the otherwise peaceful night. Somewhere, about a block over from me, a glass window pane shattered. A young woman's shrill voice echoed through the empty streets.

Curious and more than a little worried, I dashed towards the sound to find the cause of all the commotion. It was an uncommon sight in such a peaceful, prosperous city, but not unheard of elsewhere: a group of lowlife robbers had a girl cornered against a wall. Each brandished a weapon; axes, lances, and swords gleamed menacingly in the moonlight. I hung back for a few moments to get a handle on things, sizing up each of them. There were ten in all. One of them spoke.

"We told ya, didn't we?! Ya hand over the scrolls, and no one touches a hair on that pretty little head o' yours. But if ya don't…"

He didn't need to finish the sentence to get his point across, but just for show, he licked the blunt side of his axe as though it were some big, steel-and-presumably-blood flavored lollipop. _Um, gross._

Under the low lighting conditions, it was difficult to see the face of the intended victim of the attack, but based on her silhouette, she seemed to be in her twenties. "Please, listen to me!" she pleaded shakily with the attackers. Her voice was a bit husky and she had an accent I couldn't quite place. "You do not know what you are doing. The true value of these scrolls has nothing to do with the price! Without these, the fate of the world is-"

"Enough talk!" interrupted Axe Licker. "If ya won't hand 'em over like a good little girl, I'll cut ya ta ribbons!"

He gave the signal, and his goons leapt into action. Figuring that it was my cue to do something, I fired off a spell to get their attention. " _Burst Rondo!"_

Now, for those of you not already in the know, Burst Rondo is a fire spell that's more bark than bite. It's loud, flashy, and perfect for making a big entrance. So needless to say, it managed to make an impression on the band of would-be thieves. They diverted their attention away from their target and snapped around to face me.

"Who the hell are you?" a hooded outlaw with a spear demanded, taking up a defensive position.

I brandished Brenda and puffed out my chest to look as intimidating as possible. "Your worst nightmare," I replied darkly. _Ooh, I always wanted to say that!_

"Oh yeah?" Axe Licker grinned savagely. "Ya look more like a grade school kid ta me," he sized me up as the dust from my attack settled. "Stand back boys, I'm more than enough for Cupcake here ta handle."

"You're gonna regret underestimating me, punk! I'll make you eat those words! Come and get some!" I taunted back. _Okay, any more smack talk at this point would be overkill. Time to get busy._

To tell you the truth, I was pretty nervous. Sure, I'd taken out a bunch of meatheads like this before in the cave, but there hadn't been ten in one place. Once I took out this guy, who was obviously the leader, the other nine would naturally be all over me like flies on yesterday's corned beef special.

I quickly formulated a plan on the spot. I'd draw them into close combat with the sword, then strike with magic when they were at point blank range to avoid unnecessary property damage. It was a little bit risky, especially because I'd never used Aunt Luna's sword before. But the blade felt light and comfortable in my grasp, and...it's hard to explain, but holding it gave me a little bit of confidence. It was sort of like when I was little and Dad showed me how to use a wooden practice sword for the first time, guiding and encouraging me as I learned how to advance, retreat, parry, and block. Everything seemed so easy back then. Back when I was young and carefree and not fighting ten ugly bandits with a stolen sword. Yeah, those were the good old days...

 _Whoops!_ Enough reminiscing. Axe Licker rushed me head-on, and I quickly assumed a defensive stance _._ The blade in my hand began to glow strangely as I shielded my head from the incoming axe strike.

 _Clang!_ Not only did Brenda deflect the blow from the bloodied axe, but Axe Licker himself was knocked back several feet from the impact, his weapon swinging out of his grip and right into an unsuspecting cohort behind him. _Ew, that's gonna leave a stain._

My opponent looked as confused as I was. My best guess was that the magic in the sword had been activated somehow. Anyway, I saw an opening, and I took it. " _Freeze arrow!"_ I cried, picking off the unsuspecting Axe Licker with a magic icicle through the chest.

Two down, eight to go. But there was no time to gloat; two goons with spears were about to skewer me if I didn't do something.

" _Dug haut!"_ I cried in a panic, slamming my free hand into the ground to cast the spell. Stalagmites rose up from the street, impaling one of the two spear fighters. The other tripped and fell towards me, and taking a calculated risk, I struck with Brenda, rendering the second spearman (at the very least) unconscious.

"You like that?!" I shouted. "Who's next?"

I had hoped the remaining six fighters would fall back after seeing their pals get busted up and turn tail as soon as I threatened them, but no such luck. They came charging at me all at once, and although I was terrified, I wasn't too freaked out to remember my plan. " _Dil_ _Brand!"_ I mouthed a simple earth spell. A circle of magical energy hummed and whirred around me, sending the six remaining brigands careening into the air. I hacked at them with the sword as they fell, and they landed with six squishy _plops._

Taking a moment to catch my breath, I surveyed the surroundings. None of the robbers were left standing, and the few who had survived the scrape would hopefully be out cold until I could alert the proper authorities. The stalagmites were still sticking out of the pavement like sore thumbs, but they should crumble with time, as they were only held up by magic which should fade rather quickly. Other than that, the damage had thankfully been minimal.

"Hello? Miss? Are you okay…?" I called out into the night. But the girl with the scrolls was nowhere to be seen.

I don't blame her for high-tailing it out of there, but a " _Thank you"_ might have been nice after all the trouble I'd gone through! _Sheesh, what a drag. I didn't even get to see what she looked like, or ask her about what happened. Oh well. At least I can loot the bodies…_

But just as I was about to help myself to whatever dirty money was in Axe Licker's side pouch, a voice from behind me scared the everloving crap out of me. (Hey, you'd be jumpy too if you'd just fought ten meaty guys!) "My goodness!" it cried out in surprise. "What a mess."

The voice was clear as a bell and belonged to someone using the local dialect, very different from voice of the girl I'd recently rescued. I snapped to attention and turned around to find a woman of about 18 dressed in snow white shrine maiden's robes smiling directly at me. She lowered the hood of her silken cloak, and maybe it was just a trick of the moonlight, but I couldn't help but think that she was absolutely gorgeous.

Her long, straight, silver hair was cut to frame her perfectly round face, falling in delicate wisps around her chin and spilling over her shoulders. A pair of solid gold hoop earrings stood out against her milky complexion, and her ice-blue eyes sparkled triumphantly, as if she'd just stumbled upon a treasure trove or at least a _really_ good sale.

"I suppose we ought to go and fetch the royal guards to clean this up. Still, to think that I'd really find you here, and so soon, too... _ooh_ , lucky me!" she chirped, placing her cheeks in her palms jovially and jumping up and down a bit.

 _Huh?_ "You were...looking for _me?_ " I asked, dumbstruck. "You sure you got the right person?" I quirked an eyebrow. Despite some of the stronger personalities in my family, I'm not exactly what you'd call a celebrity.

"Oh yes, there's no mistaking it!" the shrine maiden cooed. "That formidable waitress uniform, your sparkling sword, the way you thrashed those villains...gracious me, it's just such an honor to meet you in person!" she practically gushed. "I can't believe I'm speaking with _the_ Knight of Ceiphied, Luna Inverse! Though to be quite frank, you're a bit younger than I'd imagined…"

 _Is this chick serious?_ I couldn't help but blush beet red at all the compliments and attention, but to confuse me with my aunt just because of the uniform and the sword… " _Yeah_ , you're clearly not from around here, are you?" I ran my fingers through my hair nervously.

I mean, sure, I was dressed in that mauve monstrosity of a skirt and swinging Brenda around, but the similarities between Aunt Luna and myself pretty much ended there. Not only am I less than half her age, I'm...kind of on the scrawny side, to put it mildly. Maybe _some_ day I'll be blessed with Auntie's generous proportions, but for now I don't exactly fill the uniform right. In most other regards, I take after my parents in the looks department, too. I have a mess of blonde bangs that are constantly getting in the way of my big brown eyes, though I pull most of my short, wavy hair into a ponytail when I'm waitressing.

None of that seemed to matter to the shrine maiden, though. "Oh? No, I suppose I've been away for quite some time...but I know you by your reputation! You're quite a famous swordswoman, you know," she prattled on. "It's clear to see from watching you that you really know your way around a fight. Your technique is remarkable. Just as I'd expect from one imbued with the power of the gods!"

 _Huh_. No one had ever really acknowledged that I was anything other than third-rate with a sword before. Probably because, in actuality, I'm not all that great. I'm sort of clumsy, really, despite all Dad's best efforts to teach me. This lady obviously did _not_ get out much if she thought _I_ looked like I knew what I was doing. Still... _I could kind of get used to this_ , I thought.

"Uh...go on…?" I encouraged her, hoping to squeeze a little more praise out of this bizarre encounter.

"Oh dear!" she suddenly recoiled. "But where oh where are my manners? I didn't even properly introduce myself!" she stood agape at her own lack of introduction. "Really though, Miss Luna, I'm ever so pleased to make your acquaintance," she bounced back fairly quickly, taking my right hand in hers and shaking it with a surprising amount of gusto. "I am Blanche, a humble servant of the noble house of Zephiel. I've been studying as a shrine maiden at the Temple of Ceiphied in the Holy City of Saillune for quite some time now, and I've just returned home tonight, you see," she explained.

"Er...back up a second. Did you say you work for the House of _Zephiel?_ As in...the same house that the _Queen_ happens to live in?" I blinked. Looking at her face and her robes now, it was starting to make sense. The Queen of the kingdom was known for selecting the most elegant young noblewomen to be her ladies in waiting. It was sort of awkward, realizing I was in the presence of some hotshot aristocrat while dressed like a disheveled maid reject.

Blanche's dazzling smile intensified as she drew me closer, tugging insistently on my outstretched hand as she broke into a run. "Come, there's no time to lose! We've so much to discuss! I'll explain everything when we arrive at my family's mansion," she promised.

 _Hey, wait a second! I didn't agree to anything here!_ "Hang on a minute!" I protested.

"We can talk about my proposition over dinner," Blanche added, ignoring me completely. "Naturally, the servants must be preparing a feast for my return, so there shall be plenty of food for the both of us!" the noblewoman remarked.

"...a feast, you say?" I grunted. Well, _maybe_ it wouldn't hurt to just hear her out. I mean, it _would_ be a shame to let good food go uneaten…right?

* * *

Somewhere between my third helping of chicken pot pie and my fourth bowl of lentil soup, Blanche cleared her throat for the umpteenth time. "So, Miss Luna…"

I kept eating.

"Ah...I'm sorry, but...Miss Luna?" she pushed her plate aside, looking directly into my eyes.

 _Huh…? Oh, crap, I forgot! She means me!_ I snapped to attention in my seat, managing a graceful ' _Whaasup_?' through a mouthful of pie crumbs.

"Erm...well, Miss Luna, I'm certainly glad that Marsha's cooking is to your liking. Shall we get to the matter at hand?" the young noble probed delicately. Reluctantly, I tore myself away from my next fork full of gooey meat and carrots and nodded. I had absolutely zero intention of taking on any additional jobs-waitressing was enough of a headache on its own. But contrary to popular belief, I was raised with _some_ manners. I gave the gracious hostess my full attention as she launched into her spiel.

"As I mentioned, I have been studying magic in Saillune for quite some time. To be more precise, I am specializing in the healing arts. You see…" she shifted, looking a bit uncomfortable, "I made a solemn promise to Milady, the Queen. And it is a promise I fully intend to keep, no matter the cost to me," Blanche explained. Something flashed in her eyes just then that really struck me-the weight of a devastating sadness that I couldn't fully comprehend. I wasn't quite sure what to say.

"I suppose you must have heard the rumors by now," she elaborated, "regarding Her Majesty, the Eternal Queen…?"

I nodded. _Everyone_ in Zephilia had heard the rumors. And not just people in the capital city, either; the whole _kingdom_ knew. It was even all over the village square back home. Usually, I don't give much credence to that sort of thing, but occasionally at night, I'd heard Mom and Dad talking about it in hushed voices.

Since you're an out-of-towner, I'll give you the lowdown. My home country of Zephilia is ruled by a monarch known to most of us as the Eternal Queen. I've never seen her, but it's said she is as infinitely beautiful as she is wise, and that no matter how long she lives and serves as the Queen, she does not age. These are gifts bestowed upon her by a certain god.

Now, bear with me here, because this is where the lines between facts and legends get kind of fuzzy. So, some one thousand years ago (give or take a few hundred years) there was this _huge_ war. Some scholars call it the War of Resurrection, or the Demon War, because one of the seven pieces of the Dark Lord, Ruby Eye Shabranigdu was- _you guessed it_ -resurrected. Yeah, you remember what I said earlier? About the crazy powerful sorcerer called Lei Magnus, and how he had a fragment of Shabranigdu sleeping in his soul? Well, once _that_ thing got out and merged with Magnus, a few pretty important things happened.

One: The Gods and their servants, primarily Elves and Dragons, waged an all-out war to protect the whole world from being destroyed by Shabranigdu and _his_ servants, the Mazoku. (Side note: The gods, I guess I should mention, were originally ruled by the mighty Flare Dragon Ceiphied, but during a previous struggle for the world, Ceiphied was divided into four parts, known as the Dragon Kings, whereas Shabranigdu had been divided up into seven.)

Two: The Mazoku struck back by creating a magical barrier, which isolated the continent where we currently live from all outside contact. The most important consequence of creating this barrier was that the piece of Shabranigdu as well as the Water Dragon King, Ragradia, were sealed _inside_ the barrier, but the other three gods,the Fire, Earth, and Sky Dragon Kings, were stuck _outside._ In other words, the Water Dragon King was forced to figure out a way to take down Shabranigdu alone. (Good news for us though-he did! Which brings me to my next point…)

Three: The Water Dragon King used the last of his power to seal up Magnus, and by extension, Shabranigdu, in a block of enchanted ice way up North. This brought things inside the barrier to kind of a stalemate, since the Water Dragon King had depleted his powers, but Shabranigdu was totally frozen.

However, the legacy of the Water Dragon King lived on. When the gods "die," they pass on their powers and abilities to humans. Some people, like my aunt, are born with the ability to wield a god's power in combat, while others are gifted from birth with a god's immense array of wisdom and knowledge.

Hey, are you still awake!? I hope you were taking notes. I'm the top of my class in history back home, you know! Most people would pay good money for a tutoring session like that!

 _What_!? What does that have to do with the Eternal Queen…? Well, _everything,_ actually. Because she's a living embodiment of the Water Dragon King's wisdom, dating back to before the time of the War of Resurrection. She knows literally everything the Water Dragon King knew when he sealed away Shabranigdu.

Or at least...she _did._ Here's where the rumors come in, see? Ever since a few years ago, people have been saying that the Eternal Queen has fallen ill. And what's worse, her illness has caused her to start losing all the memories left to her by the Water Dragon King. This, of course, would cause a myriad of problems if it were true. If anything were to happen to Her Highness, it would create a power vacuum in the center of a kingdom with no clear successor to the throne, for starters. And without our queen's inherent knowledge, we'd mostly have to rely on consulting old written documents like Claire Bible manuscripts to access the Water Dragon King's vast array of magical know-how. (And just FYI, a Claire Bible isn't just something you can pick up at any old newsstand or book shop. Some sorcerers have spent their whole lives looking for even a few pages of the thing. That story usually doesn't end well.)

"I'm sorry to say, Miss Luna, that the rumors are true," Blanche shook her head sadly. "But it's worse than anyone suspects. Her Majesty has been cursed for some time now, but recently she has taken a very bad turn indeed. Insiders at the palace have informed me that she now lies in an enchanted sleep upon her throne, unable to wake. And yet, we need her wisdom now more than ever. You see, as Milady grows weaker and weaker, the ice that contains the Demon King of the North...has begun to melt."

I dropped my fork. "The….The Demon King of the North!? You mean _Shabranigdu?"_ I nearly spat. _Oh crap, and I thought dealing with a mid-ranking Mazoku was bad! Imagine having to answer to_ _ **that**_ _guy!_

"Please keep your voice down!" Blanche shushed me quickly. "I know it may come as a shock, but if word of this got out…"

She didn't need to finish that sentence. It would cause mass hysteria. I gulped and nodded quietly.

"I see that you understand the potential severity of this situation," Blanche looked me in the eye again, exuding an aura of calm that only a shrine maiden could possess. "However, in my research, I have come across a clue that may help us prevent this calamity. As the Knight of Ceipheid, you must understand that foiling the Dark Lord's return is your sacred duty. But I have every confidence that you can do it," she added. "And I will be behind you every step of the way."

 _Uh, thanks for the pep talk, but..._

"Look, Blanche, there's something I should probably tell you-"

"Please promise me first, though, that no matter what happens to me, you will go on fighting," she begged. "To carry on the promise I made to protect our beloved Queen."

"Uh...sure?" I replied, perplexed. I mean, really, what else was I supposed to say to that? I felt my opportunity to weasel my way out of this thing slipping further and further out of my grasp... _damn you, appetite! What have you gotten me into!?_

"Good!" Blanche clapped her hands together, returning to her abnormally chipper self. "It's all settled then. Please allow me to explain my plan of action to you. While I was studying magic in Saillune, I happened to meet a scholar of some renown. Perhaps you've heard of him. At the sorcerer's guild, he goes by the title of Rasche the Ivory."

 _Rasche_...the name did ring a bell. I'd heard rumors about a young priest from Saillune whose research in the field of ancient magic had been making waves. The guy kept turning up spells and rituals thought to be lost for thousands of years, but their authenticity was still in question. Some mages seemed to think he was the hottest thing since the invention of the Fireball, but a lot of others regarded him as a quack.

"Yeah, I've heard of him," I shrugged. "So, you know the guy personally, huh?" I asked.

Blanche blushed deeply. "Erm...quite well indeed, yes," she twirled a lock of hair around her finger dreamily. She had this glazed-over look in her eyes, like she was somewhere else entirely. _Oh boy._

"Um...hello? Earth to Blanche?" I waved a hand in front of her face. "Does your boyfriend have a ritual or a spell that will help us out here or something?" I guessed.

"Hm…? Oh!" Blanche returned from her round trip to Lala Land and got back to business, "Erm, well, it's not quite that simple, unfortunately. It's more of a lead than anything else. And quite a dangerous one, at that. That's why I'm specifically requesting _you,_ Miss Luna."

I was equal parts intrigued and terrified. "Okay. Care to give me the details?" I prodded, hoping my wavering voice wouldn't betray me.

"Of course. Rasche's former teacher, Rivera the Azure, resides here in Zephiel. He is the head of the Sorcerer's Guild as well as a member of the Royal Parliament. Through our correspondence with Mr. Rivera, Lord Rasche and I learned that the Zephiel City Sorcerer's Guild has in its possession a certain manuscript that may be of use to Her Majesty. It contains the instructions to an ancient rite which we believe should reverse the curse. But at the very least, it should be able to awaken Her Grace from her sleep, so that we might speak with her and discover how to maintain the ice seal around Shabranigdu. And we need to gain some insight into who laid the curse on her, as well, and how it was done in the first place. Lord Rasche and I will take care of the ritual-your job is to deliver the manuscript securely to Her Highness's residence at the Royal Palace."

"I see," I replied, pushing some veggies around on my plate. "So what's so dangerous about getting this manuscript, exactly? I mean, you already know where to get it from, right? It's only about a 25 minute walk from the Guild headquarters to the Royal Palace."

"Well, yes, but...we must take the utmost care in handling and delivering it. It's kept under lock and key in a magically sealed chamber due to its rarity. It's one of a small number of extremely valuable documents, even rarer than a Claire Bible Manuscript. It is thought to have been penned by Lei Magnus himself. To that end, many sorcerers have fought and died for the knowledge it contains. And of the few fragments of this manuscript confirmed to exist, most have been reported missing or destroyed within the last 30 years."

" _Whoa!_ An authentic Magnus Manuscript?!" My hands started to tremble. If Mom were here, you can bet she'd be drooling at the thought of wrapping her greedy hands around one of those things. They were a legend among legends.

"I can tell you've got quite an impressive knowledge of sorcery," Blanche smiled. "I'd expect no less from the greatest knight in the kingdom!"

...Well, actually, it's just that Mom doesn't shut up about magic and legends and stuff. _Ever_. If you've already met her, you totally know what I mean, right? I'm pretty sure the woman even talks about it in her sleep. _Man_ is she ever a chatterbox. I'm glad I'm nothing like her, honestly.

"So I take it you already know about the powerful curse upon the manuscripts, then?" Blanche followed up.

 _Well, I do_ now! _Yikes!_ "Sure, sure, of course I know," I said quickly, deciding that it would be a certifiably bad idea to blow my cover now that I knew an obscene amount of highly classified info. _Note to self: find out what this curse business is about later._

"Good. There's no guarantee it will activate, but it is a possibility we must be aware of," Blanche informed me. "But that's about the long and short of it, I guess!" her disarming smile was back in full force. "I'll have Marsha deliver all the necessary paperwork to you in the morning. Really, Miss Luna, it's been an honor. I'm very much looking forward to working with you," she shook my hand energetically.

"Likewise," I tried to smile back. I don't think it covered up the fact that I was dying inside very well.

* * *

Hours behind schedule, I finally arrived at Meemaw and Granddad's general store to make my secret deposit, feeling like I'd been pummeled repeatedly with a sack of bricks. Quietly as I could, I unlocked the door to the back storeroom. It was pitch black inside, but the sword was still glowing like crazy. Even without the unexpected light, I could navigate the room with ease since I'd always played in there as a kid. I knew it like the back of my hand-right down to how Meemaw meticulously sorted each item by category. Except….something was out of place here. It was something I couldn't _quite_ put my finger on, but-

"Hello, Vestalia," an icy voice cut through the darkness. "We need to talk." A firm arm reached forcefully around my shoulder. I was face to face with my aunt, who smiled in a way that would make a chainsaw murderer look like a fluffy kitten by comparison.

 _Oh_ why, _gods, why, why,_ _ **why**_ _?! Why couldn't it be more robbers or that piece of Shabranigdu in here? Why did it have to be_ _ **her**_ _? This is officially the worst night of my life._

As she steered me toward the shop front, a rooster suddenly got violently ill and squawked its head off. I think. So...if you were just passing by at the time, you _might_ have accidentally thought that the noise was coming from me and that I was bawling my eyes out and screaming like a baby. Don't think about it too hard, okay?

* * *

"...and that's what happened," I breathlessly finished explaining the night's adventure as the sun started to rise.

"C...can we put these buckets of water down now, please...?" Alden squeaked pathetically. He had been standing next to me for the entirety of the story, enduring Aunt Luna's punishment with trembling arms. I had an identical pair of buckets in hand, but I'd had little time to gripe about them given the circumstances.

"Of course, dear nephew. And then the two of you may use them to clean the floor," Aunt Luna replied calmly with a wicked grin, tossing each of us a toothbrush. She leaned her chin in her hands and crossed her legs pointedly as Alden nearly fell over in disbelief.

" _Please kill me,"_ he mouthed as we exchanged glances. I felt for him, sure, but defying Aunt Luna's orders was out of the question. So, resigned to my miserable fate, I cast a Recovery spell on myself and got down to business scrubbing the floor of Meemaw and Grandad's shop. (I would've rather had a nice, hot, bitter cup of coffee to wake me up, but Dad says too much of that stuff will stunt my growth.)

And so we cleaned like our lives depended on it, with Aunt Luna lording over us from her perch atop the register counter. She turned Brenda the sword over and over in her hands, studying it deeply as though she were trying to read it. If I wasn't so delirious at the time I might have _sworn_ I heard her muttering something to it.

A half-hour and about four planks of hardwood floor later, a sharp knock on the shop window made us stop what we were all doing.

"Who's that? A customer?" Alden rubbed his eyes sleepily. I glanced at the face of the old woman standing outside. I recognized her instantly. I mean, how could I forget the lady who'd made the best chicken pot pie I'd ever eaten?

"No, it's Marsha," I shrunk back, wishing I could jump into the bucket of sudsy water and hide in it, "She's Blanche's servant," I explained with a groan.

"Wait, you mean you _weren't_ making all that stuff up?" Alden gawked. I threw my toothbrush at his face in reply, which earned me a sour look from Auntie. _Still worth it._ The brush bounced off my brother's thick skull and rebounded into his bucket with a dull _plunk._

"I'll get it," said Aunt Luna decisively. "Stay put." My bro and I looked on in disbelief as she fastened Brenda to her belt and got up to unlock the door. The delicate tinkle of bells accompanied Marsha's entrance. She bowed politely to each of us, starting with me and ending with Auntie.

"I'm here to deliver a message to Miss Inverse. She wasn't at her residence, so the neighbors suggested I might try looking here," Marsha explained. "Well, I must say, I'm glad to have found you," she turned to me, bowing again. "Is...this some sort of secret training?" she regarded me quizzically as I squatted on my hands and knees, trying to fish my toothbrush out of the bottom of Alden's bucket.

I cleared my throat lethargically, trying to find the strength to speak. "Uh, sure, something like that, I guess," I moped.

"Er, all right then. Well, I'll just leave the message with your servant here, if you don't mind," Marsha replied, shoving the envelope in Aunt Luna's face with a flourish.

"S…. _servant?_ " Aunt Luna murmured as she all but ripped the letter out of the old woman's hands. The corners of her mouth twitched fiercely, as though she were about to erupt.

Likely frightened for her life, the old woman bowed, ratted off a quick "I'llbetakingmyleavenow, gooddaytoyouall!" and made a getaway that was really quite impressive for a woman of her age.

Auntie tore the letter from the envelope and read like mad, her eyes dancing back and forth like spastic ping-pong balls. The tension hung thick in the air as we waited for her to finish. I don't think either of us floor-dwellers even dared to breathe.

Finally, she unexpectedly thrust the letter under my nose. "It's a summons to the Sorcerer's Guild," she blurted. "You're to report there a week from today to pick up the delivery on behalf of Lady Blanche. The instructions on how to transport the cargo are all included, so I suggest you read them carefully before going," she added flippantly.

I grasped the letter with my own two trembling hands and read it over. I didn't get past the first line. "Um...this isn't for me. The header says _To Miss Luna Inverse,_ " I pointed out weakly.

"An unfortunate mistake," Aunt Luna agreed, "One that wouldn't have been made if _someone_ ," she glared at me coolly, "hadn't been going around town _claiming to be me._ " It was scary and somewhat impressive, really, how she could start a sentence sounding as smooth as a silk handkerchief yet finish the same sentence with the blunt force of a mace to the head.

"She's got a point there," My brother chimed in glibly. "You reap what you sow, sis." _Ugh, butt out, you brown-noser! This doesn't concern you!_

I had to speak up in my defense, even if the accuser _was_ Aunt Luna. "I already told you, it was just a simple misunderstanding! Blanche just made a wrong assumption!" I protested.

"One which you failed to correct," Aunt Luna cut me off with quiet intensity.

"Okay, fine, so I screwed up," I sat back on my butt, crossing my arms in protest, "But there's _no way_ I can actually do this job," I rationalized. "She needs someone powerful. And she was looking for _you_ ," I stated my case, hoping my screaming interior wouldn't break through my cool front. "So why don't you report to the guild next Saturday instead? Then it'll be like she hired the right person for the job and this whole mix-up never happened," I shrugged.

Aunt Luna took me by the hands and hoisted me to my feet, her eyes burning straight into mine. If I'd had breakfast that morning, I think I would've lost it all over the floor at that point.

"Listen carefully, dear niece, because I am about to give you three pieces of advice that you are never, _ever,_ under _any_ circumstances to forget," she began. " _One_ : Always finish everything you start. _Two:_ A swordswoman is only as good as her word. And _three:_ If you ever do anything to hurt my dear Brenda, I will know, and I will find you, and I will punish you. _Severely._ Is that understood?"

I thought it over. I searched the air around me and my sleep-starved brain for answers. I looked her straight back in the eyes, and I gave her my honest response: " _Buh?"_

Auntie sighed and almost seemed to soften a bit, easing up on our staring contest for just a second. "Must I explain everything to you?" she huffed. "You took on the job, so _you_ finish it. _You_ gave Lady Blanche your word, and since both our reputations are on the line, you cannot fail. And finally…" she unfastened her sword from her side, looked at it wistfully, and in a move that shocked everyone in the room, handed it gingerly to me. "Have more confidence in yourself. Just because you still have a lot to learn doesn't mean you should stand back and let someone else fight your battles for you. A little adventuring does a young girl good. Besides, it's clear to me that Brenda has chosen you," she explained as I clumsily picked up the sword.

Brenda's hilt glowed faintly in my hands. "Neat," Alden remarked. "D'you think one of your cool weapons could maybe choose me, too?" he asked Auntie hopefully.

We both ignored him for the time being.

"A week isn't much time, but I'll teach you what I can," Auntie smirked. "Outside of work hours, of course," she added. "Alden, you may join us if you'd like. Your sister will need strong allies."

"Really!?" my brother perked up instantly. "Cool! Let's get to it," he leapt to his feet, punching the air. "I'll meet you guys out back," he said, sauntering towards the door.

"Yeah, no time like the present," I followed after a moment's hesitation.

" _ **Not so fast**_!" Aunt Luna's booming voice caught us off guard. We froze on the spot. "Were you two not listening to me earlier!? _Always finish everything you start,_ " she emphasized, pointing at the sudsy buckets on the floor. "You've _started_ cleaning, now _finish_. And no complaining. It's part of your training," she snapped.

The two of us groaned and resumed our so-called 'training.' Aunt Luna, seeming satisfied, headed for the door.

"Good. I'll be back before the shop opens. Give my regards to my parents, please," she waved as she started to make an exit.

"Where are you going?" my brother asked, slack-jawed.

"Spot needs his morning walk," Auntie answered candidly. "And then," she added as an afterthought, stroking her chin in contemplation, "Perhaps I'll visit Lantz in the hospital."


	3. Three

**3: The Whole Nine Guards**

* * *

Never in my life had a single week felt so grueling. By day, we waited tables. With the Annual Grape Festival looming on the horizon, the restaurant became more and more packed with clueless, demanding tourists. It took every ounce of restraint I had not to punt the stupid fruity cornucopias off their stupid fruity heads.

By night, we trained ourselves for the upcoming mission. B.D. was a surprisingly good sparring partner; he even let my bro and I take him two on one. Needless to say, Aunt Luna's crash course in fighting with willpower was both indescribably painful and incredibly helpful. I crawled up the stairs to bed each night feeling like my arms and legs had turned to spaghetti, and fell asleep wondering if I'd have the strength to get up in the morning. On Friday, I was allowed to take a rest to recover my strength. I reviewed my notes and ate my weight in carbohydrates, knowing that at least I was in better shape now than I'd ever been.

Still, I wondered if it would be enough. In a single week, I'd gone from a third-rate swordswoman with no special abilities and a few spells to...a _slightly less bad_ third rate swordswoman with _one_ special ability and a few spells. It weighed heavily on my mind as Alden, B.D. and I stepped through the gilded gates of the Zephiel City Sorcerer's Guild. (It hadn't been my idea to lug our chubby Brass Demon friend along for the ride, but Alden insisted it would be a great prank to dress him up like a lady and sneak him past security. Plus, if things got hairy he'd be there to back us up in a fight.)

Before too long we were standing among a smattering of well-polished oaken tables and cushy chairs in a ginormous library on the way to the Director's office. Shelves chock-full of books on sorcery, from the arcane to the mundane, stretched from the floor to the domed ceiling. Dizzyingly grand spiral staircases wound their way into the upper floors, which consisted of ample balconies surrounded by well-polished bronze railings. _Damn,_ I thought to myself, _it'd take a king's ransom to pay for a place like this. What kinds of fees do they charge, anyway!?_

Since we were early, I decided to make a quick pit stop and check out a spellbook or five. _No, I was not procrastinating!_ I was doing research, got it? Just so we're clear on that point, okay? Good. Besides, B.D. had some business in the library too. Out of the corner of my eye I spied him thumbing eagerly through a copy of _108 Ways to Enchant Your Garden._

Alden had never really been much of a reader. He decided to amuse himself by drawing a fake mustache on the librarian, who was sleeping soundly atop a small pile of papers at the circulation desk. My brother stepped back to admire his handiwork, setting aside his quill and inkwell. "Yeah, I definitely made the right choice here, the handlebar look is _so_ you," he crooned at his unwitting canvas. The librarian snored in reply. "Now for the beard, are we thinking curly or bushy…?" my brother mumbled, using his thumbs and forefingers to frame his work of art.

I dropped my pile of books on the desk, causing the librarian to stir and roll over in his sleep. " _I will kick you off this mission_ ," I warned Alden, narrowing my eyes dangerously.

"Aw, man, you're taking this _way_ too seriously," he whined, rolling his eyes. "Last time _I_ checked, the summons didn't say 'no fun allowed!' And you know the old adage...all work and no play makes Talia a dull girl," he added in a singsong voice as he dangled the inkwell and quill in front of my face. "C'mon sis, you know you want to mess with this guy a little. If anything, we're teaching him a valuable lesson about falling asleep on the job, right?"

"Well…" I mulled the proposition over. Maybe my bro was right; maybe I needed a little diversion to get my mind of the whole world-looming-on-the-precipice-of-a-major-disaster business. And this guy _did_ have it coming. (Again: I was _not_ procrastinating. I swear.) "Okay, fine, just for a minute, and then we're going straight to Rivera. Got it?" I muttered, snatching up the pen and ink.

 _A dab here, a few brush strokes there, and…_

"What's that supposed to be? A goblin?" Alden snorted.

"Are you blind!? It's a bunny rabbit!" I exploded.

Alden shook his head. "Here. Let me fix it for you, the ears are all wrong," he said smugly. He reached for the inkwell and quill I was holding, but I didn't let go. Like I was gonna let him get away with insulting my masterpiece like that!

"Who died and made you an art critic!? Let go, I'm not done yet!" I snapped, pulling the inkwell towards me.

" _You_ let go! I had it first!" my brother shot back with all the eloquence of a four-year-old. He tugged on the inkwell, giving it an overzealous yank. It flew out of my hands, did a somersault, and plummeted towards the desk.

" _Augh! Catch it!"_ I cried, but it was too late. Ink splattered everywhere as the ceramic inkwell hit the table and burst into a zillion pieces. With a great snort, the librarian bolted up in surprise just in time to see the black river of ink spreading over his papers. Then he snapped up his head to look at us. It didn't take long for him to put two and two together.

"What the-!? _What did you punks just do to my research!?"_ the librarian let out an agonized shout. His well-manicured hands flew to his spiky brown hair and balled up into fists. He looked like he was either about to kill us or burst out crying. "Do you have _any_ idea how long it took me to translate those runes?"

"It wasn't us, honest!" Alden reacted without using his brain, as usual. "We were just passing through. It must've been some other sorcerer!"

 _Oh, sure! Like he's gonna buy that line. We've got ink all over us, you moron!_ I thought loudly as I glared daggers at him, hoping twin telepathy was a thing. Alden shrugged in reply.

Weirdly enough, the librarian actually whipped his head around and checked the library for other potential suspects. But the only other soul in sight was B.D., whose face was buried in a thick volume entitled _Love Potions and You_. Alden tried to take the opportunity to sneak away when-

"Yeah, right! I wasn't born yesterday, kid!" the librarian swished back around, catching us off guard. "Now what're you gonna do about this, huh!?" he demanded, smacking his hand down on the table. He winced as wet ink splashed back up in the impact, dotting a trail of little ink blots across his face. _Hah! The laws of physics are a harsh mistress, eh Spiky?_

"Ugh," the librarian recoiled, pulling out a handkerchief and dabbing delicately at his ink-soaked forehead. I got the feeling that the guy was kind of vain.

"Can't you just use magic to fix it?" Alden scratched the back of his neck, smiling broadly.

"I'm a researcher, not some two-bit magician!" spat the spiky librarian. I rolled my eyes. In other words, Pretty Boy here had never bothered to learn a simple spell for removing stains because he thought he was too important.

"Can _you?"_ the librarian asked us emphatically. We looked at each other, then shook our heads slowly. _Oh yeah, I never bothered to learn either. Heh...whoops. Anyway…_

"What's the big deal?" I folded my arms, "It was a simple accident. Can't you, like, get Rivera to fix it for you?"

The librarian's eyes widened in mild horror. "What I'm researching is none of Rivera's business! He doesn't need to know about it, and he is _not going to find out!_ You got that, you lousy kids?" he grabbed us both by the shirts and shook us violently.

"Y'know," Alden quipped as his eyeballs knocked around in the back of his skull a bit, "For a guy who gets so much sleep, he's _super_ cranky."

"Yeah," I concurred dizzily. "I think he needs another nap."

Maybe there was hope for Twin Telepathy after all, because I think Alden read my mind. While I was voicing my concerns about Library Guy's sleeping habits, he'd been chanting a spell. " _Sleeping!"_ he uttered, holding his hands out towards the agitated bookkeeper. Library Guy's aggravated expression melted into peaceful somnolence, and he very gently collapsed into his mess of papers and ink.

I brushed myself off and whistled for B.D. "Let's get the manuscripts and get outta here before this butthead causes any more property damage," I grunted, more towards my brother than our oddly-dressed companion. Reluctantly, the disguised Brass Demon slid his book back onto the shelf and trudged over to us. He reeked of Aunt Luna's perfume.

Alden stuck his tongue out. "Whatever! This _butthead_ just saved your life," he bragged.

Talk about your gross exaggerations. Just because he could cast Sleeping, he thought he was hot stuff. "You still suck at drawing, by the way," he sniped. "That _definitely_ looks like a goblin."

I chose to be the bigger person and not respond to my brother's childish remarks. But there's a _slight_ possibility that I kicked a chair over and broke it into four pieces as we left the library and the snoozing bookkeeper behind.

* * *

"You're late," Rivera the Azure peered over the rims of his glasses at the three of us. He was a gaunt, humorless sorcerer clad in a gloomy black mantle and no-nonsense sky blue robes. His greasy black hair and mustache drooped down the sides of his head, giving him the appearance of a sullen carp. His assistant, who stood by his side, looked at the floor and said nothing. _Not a very warm welcome_ , I thought as I watched him drum his fingers on the desk, his magic rings and amulets clicking and clacking in time with the grandfather clock in the corner. His staring was making me ten kinds of nervous.

"Uh...s-sorry. My associate Sophia had to stop and use the restroom," I replied with my hands at my sides, trying to conceal my sweaty palms. B.D., or "Sophia," as it were, uttered what I assumed was an apology.

"Sophia?" Rivera quirked his eyebrows, sneering as he looked B.D. up and down. "I see," he drawled. "Then am I to presume that _you,_ young lady, are Miss Luna Inverse?" he addressed me incredulously.

I winced instinctively at the mention of Auntie's name. I can't help it, it's a reflex!

"Yup, that's her all right!" My brother butted in to 'help,' " Able to cleave dragons in half with a single swipe, more powerful than a Mazoku general and scarier than your average blow demon! You should really show her some respect, gramps," Alden continued, grinning like a fool as I contemplated crawling beneath the coffee table and crying. How could he be so relaxed at a time like this?

"And just who are _you_ supposed to be?" the Guildmaster scoffed at my brother.

"Oh, just a handsome stranger," my brother announced himself dramatically, flipping his hair for emphasis. "You could say I'm Miss Inverse's manager. Here's my business card," he added proudly, reaching into his pocket and producing a small rectangle of paper.

Rivera didn't take it. "Enough," he said calmly, dropping his gaze. "I've no time for this foolish charade. So if you children and your pet are quite through, the door is that way. Good day, and good riddance," he waved us away with a flick of his wrist, not even bothering to look at us as we headed for the door.

...and just like that, our adventure was over.

Just kidding! As we turned around to go, Rivera's assistant spoke up.

"Sir, if I may offer a suggestion," she spoke in a low voice, eyes still cast downward. _Where have I heard that foreign accent before…?_ "Please take a look at her sword before you dismiss her," she implored. The guildmaster looked a bit spooked. He'd probably forgotten the assistant was even in the room with us, seeing as this was the first time she'd so much as moved a muscle since we came in.

"Mm, quite," he mumbled, straightening his glasses as he ogled Brenda. "It certainly _looks_ like the genuine article. Stop right there, young lady, and let me inspect that weapon of yours," he grunted.

My bro and I shot each other sideways glances, shrugged, and looped back around to the desk. "Looking's free for the first five minutes. After that, we charge a fee," Alden said. He was grinning like a moron, but let me assure you that he was completely serious. He'd try to sell wood to a lumberjack if the opportunity ever presented itself.

I gave the sword and scabbard a little flourish and dropped them into Rivera's waiting hands, holding back a snort of laughter as he sagged under their weight. The guy was the very definition of a squishy sorcerer-not an ounce of meat on his bones. He pulled out a magnifying glass and examined the runes and gemstones on the hilt. Then with painstaking effort, he removed the sword from the scabbard and examined the faintly glowing blade. His assistant leaned over his shoulder so intensely to gawk, I thought I might have caught her drooling a little.

For the first time, I noticed her features-tall, pointed ears, mahogany skin, deep set amber eyes, and thick hair that had the faint sheen of mineral oil. _Could she be a Dark Elf?_ I wondered. I'd heard stories about their advanced underground civilization that lay beyond the former Mazoku Barrier. Supposedly, unlike their surface-dwelling counterparts, they had managed to survive for centuries without magic. So then what was a Dark Elf doing hanging around in a magic guild? It was an interesting question, but one that would have to wait until later. I didn't think Rivera would be too thrilled if I started playing 20 Questions with his assistant. So, back to business.

"Well?" I folded my arms impatiently. "Can we get on with this now, or what?"

"Your free trial period ends in five...four.. _three_..." Alden counted down greedily.

"Very well," Rivera snapped, shoving the sword back across his desk at me. "Ellerin," he barked at his assistant. "We will show Miss Inverse and her companions to the vault."

* * *

Blanche hadn't been kidding when she'd said the manuscript was well guarded. Only Rivera himself had clearance to access the room where it was kept, deep in the high security chambers that had been built into the catacombs below the guild. Guards stood watch in most of the upper areas, but beyond that, there were mainly traps and barriers that needed deactivating. Formidable magical seals had been cast on each area to keep out any would-be intruders.

"Are we there yet?" Alden nagged for probably the hundredth time as we descended our twenty-seventh flight of stairs. Rivera, who had been deactivating yet another sealed door with a spell, rolled his eyes. Meanwhile, B.D. nervously swatted away some bats that swarmed around his head.

Bringing up the rear were Ellerin and me. I had the uncomfortable feeling that the Dark Elf had been watching me intently the whole time. Was this the price of fame, or did she just have a _serious_ staring problem? Or maybe…

"Have we met before?" I turned around sharply, eyeing her critically. I could have started off with small talk, I guess, but that's really not my style. It was a fair question, and I had my suspicions, so why beat around the bush?

She opened her mouth to say something, but whether or not she would have answered me honestly, I'll never know. In that moment, the ground shook so fiercely I thought there might have been an earthquake...only the floor was glowing a sickly shade of pea soup green.

"Holy crap!" my brother exclaimed, jumping behind Rivera. "What the heck is _that_ thing _?_ "

A towering beast stepped into the light, casting its long shadow over our mismatched little group. It let out a cry somewhere between a cluck and a roar. B.D. uttered a grunt of surprise and ran to my side in a panic.

"A dragon!" gasped Ellerin.

"A _chicken_!" yelled Alden.

"A...dragon-chicken," I stood agog. To be more precise, we were looking at a cockatrice. Essentially, they're bipedal beings with the body of a dragon but the head and wings of a rooster. Seeing as they've got the worst qualities of both creatures, they're as temperamental as they are stupid. Not exactly pleasant to deal with, as you might imagine.

"Do not look into its eyes!" Ellerin warned the Guildmaster. "It will turn you to stone!"

Oh yeah, and there was _that_ nasty little trick.

"Is that one of the guild's security measures?!" Alden stumbled after Rivera, clinging onto the mage's azure robes with his eyes closed.

"Perhaps," said Rivera, averting his own eyes. "It's been quite a while since anyone has been down here. I don't really recall."

"But you're gonna kill it with magic, right?!" Alden screeched as the oversized fowl strutted in our direction.

"There's no need for me to get involved," the Guildmaster replied. "I'm sure a mere cockatrice is no match for the mighty Knight of Ceiphied. Why don't we leave this to Miss Inverse?" He shrugged, wiping his brow with a handkerchief. He was trying to act cool and aloof, but his hands were shaking. I couldn't tell who the bigger chicken was here-Alden, Rivera, or the _actual_ giant chicken.

 _Rivera...that lazy stuck-up jerk! If I survive the battle with this oversized chicken nugget, I'm gonna rearrange his stupid face!_

Of course, I had bigger fish...scratch that, _chickens_ to fry. I cast a Fireball and aimed it squarely at the beast. It hit the side of the monstrous bird/dragon, singeing off the feathers where it made an impact but leaving the cockatrice otherwise unharmed.

"Nice pyrotechnics, sis! Too bad your trick didn't work," Alden heckled.

 _Oh, like_ you _could do any better? Give me a break._

B.D. grunted out what sounded like a question.

"No. Its hide is too thick to be affected by most spells," Ellerin responded, shaking her head. "You would need to approach it as you would any other dragon."

 _Wait, how can you understand that guy?!_

Well, anyway, Ellerin was right. All I had done was ruffle the monster's feathers. Literally. The big, dumb, angry bird was now even angrier. It puffed itself up and started scraping its feet against the ground in irritation.

"Watch out! It's gonna charge!" Alden warned. We scattered like leaves as the monster tried to run us down.

I lost my footing as I slid to the right, skinning my knee on the incandescent floor in the process. I had a split second to make a decision before the thing came back for another pass at me. Elemental spells weren't going to do me any good, obviously. My best astral attack, the Elmekia Lance, wounded the astral bodies of lesser demons and the minds of living things that exist in the physical realm. But against the foul-tempered fowl, with its pea-sized brain and complete lack of an astral body, it would be pointless.

If Mom were here, she'd probably resort to Black Magic, but... look, promise you won't get mad? I just...never had the inclination to learn. I mean, I knew _Gaia Graze,_ because I was just curious to see if I could do it—but I had to practice that in secret! I didn't want anybody to know. All the cool kids at my school were practicing shamanism. And in my hometown, if you used Black Magic, you got kind of a reputation. At best, you'd be branded a creepy Mazoku lover and not get invited to dances. At worst, they'd start calling you stuff like "Dragon Spooker" and "The Enemy of All who Live." There are already rumors (some awesome, some... _not_ so awesome) about me, no thanks to my parents. And I was _not_ about to ruin my social life and any chance I had with the fishmonger's son on the off chance that I might someday end up in a life-or-death struggle with an enormous, bloodthirsty chicken beast, no matter _how_ much Mom insisted that I should.

...I'm kind of regretting that decision these days. Oh well, what's done is done.

So, spells were out of the question for the time being. That left me with one option: the sword at my side. If I channeled my will into it, Brenda's magic should be able to amplify it to the point where it would cut through a dragon's hide.

I stood up, readying myself for when Birdbrain inevitably came back for more. I took a deep breath, unsheathed the sword, and tried to focus my power into it. " _Sword, accept my will, sword, accept my will…_ " I muttered the mantra under my breath. " _Uh, please?"_ I added as the cockatrice flapped it's mighty wings as it ran at me. Hey, it couldn't hurt to be polite.

Aside from increasing my weapon's capacity using willpower, there's also the matter of knowing how to use said weapon. Against an armed human opponent, there's a wide variety of techniques to disarm the other combatant as quickly and efficiently as possible. But against giant monsters, which are erratic, unpredictable, and let's not forget _humongous_ -it's all about reading the situation and adapting your style as you go. In other words, the rulebook gets thrown out the window.

I charged into the fray, irritated that I couldn't look my opponent in the eye. _Okay, focus! Extend the sword, not your elbows, be alert yet loose, trust your gut, and make the first strike count!_ I talked myself through the motions, leaping up towards the beast with my eyes closed.

A flying lunge for a flying opponent-it made a marginal amount of sense, anyway. Some schools call it the "arrow" technique. It's a move that relies on forward momentum and aerial movement, so much so that you end up running past your opponent, taking them by surprise. It's actually a controversial move in tournament fencing, but like I said, when you're fighting for your life against a big, cranky monster, the rules don't really apply. I shifted my weight from my back foot to the ball of my front foot to give me that extra _oomph_ that would get the job done as I closed in on the cockatrice.

But making contact with it was going to be harder than I thought. A burst of wind rippled through my hair...wait, that wasn't wind! The cockatrice was forcing me backwards by flapping its wings to whip up a huge gust of air.

I kept running but altered my course to the left of the cockatrice, avoiding the brunt of the whirlwind. Unfortunately, this put me at too much of a distance from the opponent to actually make contact with it. So much for making the first strike count.

"Damn!" I cursed as the sword hit nothing. The cockatrice whipped around and inclined its mangy head towards me, letting out a mighty cluck as I hurriedly covered my eyes to avoid being petrified.

"Say, how would you like a nice Knight of Ceiphied statue? I'll sell it to you at a bargain price if we survive. Bet it'll look great in your front yard," my brother deadpanned to Rivera as the tides of battle turned in the cockatrice's favor.

"This is no time for your idiot jokes! I am _not_ gonna get turned into some stupid statue, you hear me?!" I boomed, firming up my resolve. Seriously, I had better things to do than get turned to stone, become a garden accessory, and get crapped on by pigeons all day. As Brenda gave off a flash of illumination, I advanced and lunged again with my eyes closed.

 _No good!_ The cockatrice whipped up another whirlwind, sending me smacking straight into the corner where the wall met the ceiling.

Brenda's weird protective power activated again, only this time, instead of deflecting an enemy attack, it slowed my descent to the ground. Slightly. A plume of magic shot out of the top like a parachute at the last second. I landed on my butt, undoubtedly bruising but not breaking anything. _That's still gonna hurt tomorrow,_ I grumbled to myself as I peeled myself off the floor. The cockatrice wasted no time closing the gap between us once again, pecking at me with its enormous, pointy beak.

 _Ow ow ow!_ "Ugh... _Lighting!_ " I summoned a ball of light into my left hand, temporarily blinding my opponent. It reared its head back with an angry cluck. (Ah, the old Lighting in the face trick. It's a classic. I do pay attention to Mom _some_ times, see?)

I charged again, running towards an outstretched wing. My problem in this battle was twofold: the fact that I couldn't get in close enough to get a hit in, and the fact that looking up at the cockatrice's head was strictly off-limits...at least it was if I didn't want to turn into a useless slab of rock.

"I must say," Rivera wiped his glasses on his shirt as I darted towards the monster. "Her resilience is remarkable. But her technique is a bit…"

"Unorthodox?" Alden suggested.

"I was going to say _sloppy_ ," Rivera sniffed. _Pssht!_ Big talk coming from a guy who couldn't even _lift_ a sword!

B.D. continued his conversation with Ellerin. He gestured at the cockatrice and mumbled.

"Yes, you may be right," Ellerin answered. "I believe that would work. However, I lack a weapon at the present time. I'll leave it in your hands."

B.D. nodded resolutely, making the curls on his golden wig flap up and down beneath his oversized bonnet. He shifted back an arm and a leg and assumed a stance like an archer, letting loose with a spell. I recognized it as Flare Arrow. A number of magical, flaming arrows appeared beside me in the air, zooming faster than me towards the cockatrice.

"Wait, I thought you said magic wouldn't work?" Alden scratched his head. But just then, the arrows landed with precision in the monster's eyes, blowing them apart. The monster screamed in blood-curdling agony, stomping hard enough to shake the entire chamber.

"Thanks for the chance, B- _I mean Sophia!"_ I shouted. Now that I could look directly at my foe, all bets were off. Alden gripped Rivera's robes for balance, interrupting the Ray Wing the sorcerer was trying to cast to save his own bacon as the floor became increasingly unsteady. I cast a Levitation spell to launch myself up into the air, stopping at the ceiling over the beast.

"Say your prayers, chicken!" I screamed, channeling every last ounce of energy into the sword. (It was the best line I could come up with in a pinch, and I had to say _something.)_

I let go of the spell, using my fall as leverage as I focused squarely on the creature below me as it grew closer and closer. Letting gravity do most of the work, I went all out with a mighty swing. It neatly sliced the cockatrice's leathery, feather-covered hide in half from head to toe. And as I stood there, panting and covered in cockatrice guts, I had to admit...I felt like sort of a badass.

B.D. and Alden rushed over to me, apparently happy I was alive. As my bro gave me a well-deserved high five and B.D. nearly crushed me in an awkward hug, I noticed Rivera and his assistant cavorting out of the corner of my eye.

"I see," uttered the sunken-faced Guildmaster to the Dark Elf in a near-whisper. "So _that's_ the power of the Holy Sword, Calibren."

* * *

The whole thing felt kind of fishy to me, I'll admit. Who had planted that oversized chicken? Why were the Guildmaster and his lackey so interested in my sword? I definitely didn't trust them, and the thought that they might turn on us and try to fight us crossed my mind. But I kept the thought to myself, since they were our only hope of getting our hands on that prized manuscript. And since the sword was in _my_ hands, I decided to hedge my bets.

We continued down several floors, our spirits considerably drained after the fight with the cockatrice. Finally, we arrived at our destination…

"A brick wall!?" Alden screeched. "We came all this way for _a dead end_? Aw man…" he slumped down to the floor. "My legs are like jelly from all these stairs. Are we gonna have to go back and try another way?"

B.D. patted him on the head and spoke gibberish again. Ellerin, of course, was the only one of us to understand him and form a response.

"That's correct. The gateway will appear if the right sequence of runes is chosen," she nodded. Upon closer inspection, I noticed that the bricks had writing on them. Each one was inscribed with a single rune.

Rivera pushed through to the front, sweat dripping off the ends of his mustache. "Step aside, children. The code to this vault has been passed down from guildmaster to guildmaster for the last three hundred years. It's not something to be toyed with. As such, I must insist that leave this chamber until I summon you."

We begrudgingly complied, and when we returned to the room, it looked very much the same...except for a glowing magic circle smack dab in the middle of the floor.

"Now what?" I asked, eyeing it skeptically.

"Now ask for the item you need from the vault," Rivera said impatiently, "And it will appear before you if you are pure of intention. But do hurry. Once the spell deactivates, the portal will become inactive for a number of days."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Step aside, Gramps," I grunted, feeling cranky. " _O magic vault, grant me that which I need to save her Royal Highness, an item to-_ "

"A simple name will do!" Rivera the Killjoy snapped.

"All right, all right already!" I snapped right back. " _Gimme the Magnus Manuscript_!" I all but screamed into the darkness.

The magic circle's glow faded, and for a second I thought nothing had happened.

Then, with a subtle _poof,_ a single piece of paper fluttered down from the ceiling. Alden was the first to make a grab for it.

"So, this is it, huh!? A priceless magical artifact of untold power! Cool!" he cheered. "I wonder what it says," he sang to himself. He looked the page over, and his face fell.

"What's the matter?" I asked, snatching the paper away from him. "You forget how to read, stupid?" My eyes scanned the paper, but...let's just say it wasn't quite what I had expected. A few hasty lines were scrawled on it in plain, sloppy handwriting. I read it aloud.

 _Sorry, I borrowed the manuscript._

 _Love,_

 _The Great Sorcerer Zerramond._

" _What_?!" everyone else gasped in unison.

 _Sigh_. Why can't anything ever be easy?

* * *

The so-called "great" sorcerer, Zerramond, as I came to find out, had a hell of a reputation at the Sorcerer's Guild. His research in the fields of magical linguistics and astral theory were considered essential reading if you asked any of the stuffed shirts at the Guild. (And yeah, I tried picking up a spare copy of his _A Prolegomenon to a Theory of Paralinguistic Linearization: Concerning the Precultural Narrative and Poetics in Archaic Draconic Spellcasting,_ but I put it back on the shelf faster than you could say " _nnnnope_.")

Whether or not _I_ could have given a crap about his 382 pages of pretentious jargon, the Guild Council apparently thought he was hot stuff. They sang his praises from the rooftop of their ivory tower. Well, except for a few pompous old guys who thought they were smarter than him and had dedicated the forces of their lives to trying to conclusively prove him wrong so they could point and laugh at him. But that's the cutthroat world of academia for you. Either way, everyone there knew the name Zerramond.

But here was the kicker: In 40 years, nobody had ever even _seen_ the guy. He was a registered member of not only the local guild, but of several throughout the continent. But he'd never shown up to a single guild meeting, never defended a dissertation in public, and never even so much as signed into the library. When I asked Rivera about it, he grunted and dug up his last correspondence from Zerramond, muttering something under his breath about his membership fee being overdue.

There was, at least, a local return address on the faded envelope. Which meant our illustrious mystery sorcerer who had "borrowed" the priceless manuscript either had a house in town or was using a fake address to send his mail.

I headed over to the address. It was the only lead I had to go on at that point. And I intended to see how far it would take me. After all, a very wise and very frightening woman once told me: "Finish everything you start."

Speaking of whom, I didn't even bother stopping back at Auntie's for dinner. She was making chicken that night anyway. _Nooooo thanks._ After that last mess of a battle, I was seriously considering becoming a vegetarian.

So as it were, Alden, B.D. and I found ourselves on the doorstep of a grossly opulent old mansion far on the outskirts of town. B.D. rang the bell and fidgeted anxiously in his petticoats as we waited for an answer. Meanwhile, Alden was slumped over the bannister, looking a bit perturbed.

"Don't look now, sis, but we've got company," he groaned, indicating a lone figure storming up the driveway. I whipped around to find myself face-to-face with the spiky-headed librarian we'd run into at the guild earlier.

" _Gotcha_! Now look, you two-bit hooligans-!" Spikey wheezed, tossing back his mantle ferociously. "If you think…" he stopped to gasp for air, "That you can just _waltz_ into a man's study and...and _tamper_ with his precious research-and then just _leave..._ then you've got another thing coming!" he flailed his arms around, panting again. Clearly this was a sorcerer who didn't get out from under his mountain of books much. The guild was just full of these kinds of people, it seemed. "Is this where you live?! _Huh? Ooh,_ I just can't _wait_ to tell your parents what you've done! And you can bet that if _they_ don't punish you for your little stunt, then _I_ will!"

Now bear in mind that Alden and I were just kind of standing there humoring the guy. But his typical geezer spiel was starting to get old. I was considering just slapping a _Dil Brand_ across his maw when the door to the mansion finally swung open. A fishy smell wafted out of the building, causing the red-faced librarian to gag and stagger backwards. I watched him trip over the flowerbed in mild amusement.

"May I help you people?" An unfamiliar voice asked. I turned back around toward the doorway, and suddenly the day-old fish smell made perfect sense. The butler was a fish man. Yes, _fish man._ As in half-fish, half-man, all stinky. He clearly had the body of a fish, but his arms and legs were human. He had on a crappy bow tie and black suit, with a serving towel flung over his forearm. It sort of reminded me of a trading card Alden had in his collection, actually. Fish Man merchandise is a huge deal with the kids in my hometown. But standing face-to-face with a genuine fish guy in real life was less than pleasant. Soaking in his fishy aroma was the _last_ thing my delicate stomach needed after marinating in cockatrice guts all day. It almost made me want to reconsider my five-year plan wherein I wooed and married the fishmonger's incredibly-attractive-yet-incredibly-fish-smelly son.

... _Almost._ He's _really_ good-looking, okay?! Anyway.

"We're looking for Zerramond," I got straight to the point. No use wasting my breath on stupid greetings and basking in the glow of _eau de sashimi_ any longer than strictly necessary.

"Now hang on _just_ a minute," interrupted the librarian, folding his arms and squinting at the whole lot of us, "You're telling me Zerramond the sorcerer lives _here?_ What business do you brats have with him? Did Rivera put you up to this?!"

The fish butler narrowed his gooey eyes at Spikey, then looked back to me. " _Master_ Zerramond," he droned, "is regrettably away on business and will not return for some time. Furthermore, I can _assure_ you that upon returning, the Master will not wish to speak with any of you. Good day," he concluded, reaching for the doorknob.

" _Wait a second!"_ Alden wormed his way between the door and the mull post, preventing the door from slamming. I guess I was mildly impressed at his ability to become a human doorstop on such short notice. Better him than me, because _ouch,_ that had to hurt. I could see it written all over his face. Way to take one for the team, bro!

"Excuse me, sir," the fish man interjected dully. "Please remove yourself from the door or I will do it for you."

" _But we need that manuscript!_ Just let us in already!" Alden protested. "It'll only take us like ten seconds to find it!" He grunted. I guess he forgot about the part where we had no idea what the thing looked like or even _where_ Zerramond might have stashed it in that ginormous mansion.

"What manuscript?" Library Guy interrupted again, leering at me.

"Mind your own beeswax, jerk!" I interjected. I'd had enough of this bullcrap.

Apparently, so had the fish butler. "GOOD DAY TO YOU, SIR!" he all but screamed, kicking Alden over the doorstep. For a guy with such floppy legs, the piscatorial servant was sure stronger than he looked. Anyway, Alden knocked into me, I knocked into the librarian, he tripped over B.D., and we all found ourselves toppled over on the lawn like so many dominoes.

"I think we need a Plan B," Alden panted.

"You _think?"_ I rolled my eyes, dusting myself off.

"SO," interrupted Library Guy for the billionth time that evening, "Time for some answers. _Why_ exactly is it that a couple of ne'er-do-wells like you are so dead-set on getting this manuscript from the most renowned sorcerer in the kingdom? Don't tell me Rivera's hiring juvenile delinquents to run his errands," he snorted. "How much is he paying you, exactly?"

"Nothing," I snapped back. "Rivera's not the boss of me, and neither is anybody else!" ... _Except Auntie and the shift manager and my mom and dad, but that's not very conducive to sounding like a badass here. "_ Get off our case already."

"Yeah! For your information, while you've been napping in a pile of outdated literature, we've been out here _saving the world,_ " Alden smirked. "Out of the goodness of our hearts!" I immediately wanted to wipe said smirk off his face. So I did. I punched him in the stomach. _Why would you tell him that?!_ I internally screamed.

Library Guy seemed pretty unimpressed. "Is that so. Well, we'll just see about that," he furrowed his brow. "I'm sticking to you two like glue until we track down that manuscript."

" _We?!"_ I spat. "You are _not_ a part of this thing!" I fumed, brandishing my fists furiously. "Go back to your sorry pile of books before I make _you_ sorry, Gramps!"

" _Gramps_?! The name's Arc Macrius - but that's _Mister_ Macrius to you two clowns," Library Guy prickled and shouted back. "And I'm _making_ myself a part of this thing, and there's _nothing_ you can do about it!"

 _Deep breaths, Talia. Count to 10…_

"Okay, five minutes ago you didn't even know we were _looking_ for a manuscript. Now all of a sudden you want to find it with us? What's your deal?" I tried to be the adult in this situation, since no one else was stepping up to the plate.

"Yeah, your motivations are fishier than the butler," Alden wheezed.

"Well, maybe if you two weren't such insensitive clods, you'd realize you _owe_ me a look at that manuscript. Unlike you, I've got deadlines to meet and bills to pay! I need _some_ sort of findings to turn in to the Guild Council this month-and after the mess you made of my rune translations, the _least_ you can do is give me one of Zerramond's manuscripts."

"You don't even know what it says," Alden pointed out. "For all you know, it's a recipe for soup."

"I seriously doubt that," Macrius rolled his eyes. "If both Zerramond and Rivera have an interest in it, it's got to be something important. I'd stake my career on it," he folded his arms.

"Fair enough, I guess. But what makes you think we'll just let you tag along with us?" Alden, ever the negotiator, pressed.

"Yeah, who says you're invited?" I sulked. "You'd probably just be in the way."

"Oh, I don't see that you have much of a choice," Macrius grumped, "Unless of course you'd like me to alert the Queen's council to the fact that you've been impersonating the Knight of Ceipheed," he made a grand, sweeping gesture.

" _What?!"_ I panicked. _If that gets back to Blanche, things could get messy,_ I thought irritatedly. _Well, messi_ er.

"How _dare_ you, sir!" Alden lunged forward in mock indignation. "This young lady is the one and only Knight of Ceipheed!" _Ugh, his acting is terrible._

"Right. And I'm the Crown Princess of Saillune," Macrius rolled his eyes. "Even a complete _nincompoop_ could tell you're a total amateur. You do know the most likely reason Rivera and his flunky are putting up with your two-bit charade is that they're after your sword, right?" He sneered.

My bro and I exchanged glances. It wasn't that far-fetched a statement to believe, at least not after the way Rivera and Ellerin's little pow-wow had gone down in the vault. Macrius was certainly no friend of ours-at least not while he was making brazen attempts to sneak a peek at the manuscript-but he was clearly not on chummy terms with Rivera, either.

I started to regret my involvement in the mission more with each passing second _. Geez_ , guild politics are ugly. No wonder Mom avoids those places like the plague.

I mulled it over again. So we couldn't trust Rivera, and I doubted we could trust Macrius either. But I figured it might be worthwhile to see just what kind of info I could get out of Macrius, even if I had to take it with a healthy dose of skepticism.

"Okay, here's the deal, Mac. Tell me what you know about Rivera and the sword, and I _might_ consider letting you tag along with us," I said, trying to look tough.

"That's _Mister_ _Macrius!_ But fine," the librarian scowled, twirling his bushy ponytail. "The Holy Sword, Calibren - Rivera and his assistant both want it. For research purposes - that's the official reason, anyway. Y'know, he offered the _real_ Knight of Ceiphied a fortune for it about ten years ago. But she refused."

"Why didn't the deal go through?" Alden pressed.

"Oh, I don't know, some tripe about the sword having sentimental value. The Knight said it was a gift from her kid sister or something like that," Macrius explained. "And Rivera was too chicken to even talk to her ever again. Hah!" the librarian chuckled darkly, apparently reveling at the idea of the Guildmaster cowering before the Almighty Knight of Ceipheed. It _was_ a pretty funny mental image, I guess. Especially if you assumed Auntie was wearing her waitress uniform.

"But actually," he continued, "as far as any of us knows, the value of the sword is purely historical. Dates back to the time of the War of Resurrection. There are a few myths and legends about it being the weapon wielded by the Earth Dragon King, but they're completely unfounded. And the sword's magical capabilities are obviously diminished now-if it ever had any in the first place, I mean."

"Hey! Brenda can do loads of cool stuff!" Alden said defensively.

"Brenda? Is _that_ what you call it?" Macrius raised an eyebrow. "Of all the asinine-"

"Insult her again and I'll introduce you to her pointy end," I threatened.

"The real insult here is the way _you're_ treating it," Macrius rebutted. "It may be a collector's item, but it's not a toy! I'm afraid to ask, but how did _you_ two end up with it?"

"Hey, lay off! I'm doing the best I can," I fumed. "The sword chose me, okay? I don't really get it either, but whatever. All we can do now is move on."

Mac stopped to consider my words, and seeming satisfied enough with my answer, he switched gears. "All right. Then let's hasten to the next order of business," he scratched his nose. "How do you propose we secure the manuscript? Should we wait and ask Zerramond directly?"

"Oh _sure_ ," I rolled my eyes. "Let's just sit here on the doorstep and play checkers and wait for Zerramond to come back from who knows where doing who knows what. We could even have a tea party and invite the fish butler and Shabranigdu, too, because oh yeah, _his block of ice is gonna melt if we don't do something before he-_ ouch _!."_

Now it was Alden's turn to punch _me_ in the stomach, and I guess I deserved it for accidentally spilling the beans about the Demon King of the North. Although Mac didn't seem too awfully concerned with the oncoming apocalypse.

"Shabranigdu. Mhm. You kids certainly have active imaginations," he wiped his spectacles on his shirt uninterestedly. "So, what do _you_ propose we do then, Little Miss Knight? Break into the mansion, steal it, and run off into the night?" Mac scoffed.

"Well basically, yeah," I sighed, "but when you put it _that_ way, it makes me sound like some common burglar. Which I'm not. But he is," I indicated my brother.

"Hey, who're you calling common?" He stood up, looking resolute. "We're breaking in for a good cause! I'm a Thief of Justice!"

Mac looked bewildered and shot a sideways glance towards B.D. and I. B.D. looked up from the daisy chain he was braiding on the lawn and shrugged.

"Hey, Thief of Justice," I rolled my eyes. "You're in charge here. Do you have a plan yet, or were you just going to stand around on the lawn all day?"

Alden nearly toppled over in surprise. "A _plan?_ " he echoed. "Uh, I mean, of course I do! But it'll have to wait until later tonight."

"Because you haven't thought of it yet, I presume?" I buried my face in my palms.

" _No!"_ Alden countered cheekily. "Because everyone knows that a Great Thief only works under cover of darkness!"

"Shout it a little louder why don't you! I bet the people in the next kingdom couldn't hear you," I muttered.

"I'm in charge now, so listen up, maggots! We meet back here at o'nineteen hundred! That's seven o'clock, for those of you not versed in military time. Anyone who's late eats a slug!" Alden proclaimed, rubbing his hands together. I vowed to never let him be in charge again.

"Is he serious?" asked Mac disgustedly.

"As a heart attack," I answered. "So unless you're jonesing for something slimy, get here early," I advised.

And with that, I went to kill some time in the market.

* * *

Seven o'clock came, and there we all were again, convening on the lawn. The bucket of slugs Alden brought went sadly unused. (It was too bad, really. Kind of a waste. I _so_ would've enjoyed watching Macrius choke on a slug.)

"You guys didn't even change clothes?" Alden pouted. He and B.D. were dressed in black from head to toe. I wondered how on Earth they'd even managed to find a ninja getup in that size. (Although B.D.'s top looked suspiciously like the shift manager's blouse.)

" _Ew,_ no way. Black is _so_ last season," I gagged.

"And _I_ have better things to do than play dress-up!" Mac whisper-screamed. "While _you_ twerps were wasting your time, _I_ did some research on the layout of the mansion," he bragged, brandishing a set of blueprints.

Alden swiped them out of Mac's clenched fist with lightning speed. "What the-?!" Mac protested as Alden spread the blueprints out on the ground. B.D. looked over my bro's shoulder with interest.

"I see, I see," Alden nodded gleefully. "Yep, just like I thought. The basement window here is our best bet for an entry point. It's at ground-level, which means it'll be easier to pick the lock on it than if we, say, levitated and went straight for the second floor. But we can use this stairwell here to get to the second floor corridor, and from there, Sis and I can check out the library. B.D., you'll be the lookout."

"What about me?" hissed Mac irritably.

"You've got the most important job of all, Mac!" Alden smirked, tossing Mac an overstuffed rucksack.

"What the hell is this?" Mac regarded the bag as if it had cooties.

"Sandwiches," Alden shrugged. "Thieving makes me hungry."

"Fifteen years. I spent _fifteen years_ studying Holy Magic at the Academy, which is longer than either of you dunderheads have probably even been alive, and you're making me out to be some kind of _sandwich dispenser_? You sorely underestimate me, boy," Macrius scowled and sagged under the weight of the sandwiches.

"Fifteen years, huh? What happened? Did you have to repeat a grade?" Alden quirked an eyebrow. "I mean, don't get me wrong, school's boring and all, but _jeez_..." he trailed off.

Okay, to tell you the truth, I was mildly impressed. Holy Magic is a branch of magic thought to be totally lost to humans after the Mazoku Barrier went up a millennia ago. Only in the last twenty years had it even really started to make a comeback. So if our newly-acquired sandwich handler had been studying it for roughly that long, he must be a pioneer in the field.

...Which was actually pretty cool.

 _Too bad it's probably the only thing Pencil Pusher Mac has going for him_ , I thought to myself as B.D. gave me a leg up over the garden wall.

It was, without a doubt, the absolute ugliest garden I'd ever seen. Either Zerramond needed to fire his landscaper, or he just hated plants. Where most people would've placed cute topiaries or rose bushes, there were nine grotesque, winged gargoyles—complete with sneering faces and giant stone weaponry. Rather than shrubbery or flowers, the ground was littered with jagged rocks that seemed to be loosely patterned into three overlapping triangles. _Not_ exactly the kind of place to host a friendly tea party.

Then again, given the supposedly elusive nature of The Great Sorcerer Zerramond, I doubted he saw much company.

"I don't like this," warned Mac. He pulled out his pendant, sprinkled some kind of topaz-colored dust over it, and uttered an incantation. "Just as I expected from Zerramond," he sniffed disapprovingly, "Black Magic in spades."

"You didn't need a fancy incantation to figure _that_ out," I rolled my eyes. "This place gives me the creeps."

B.D. shuddered in agreement.

"We can't just strut across here all willy-nilly," Mac cautioned, adjusting his glasses. "This is a nonagram formation set in draconic onyx that's rarely been seen since the time of the Demon War, and it's not even on the blueprints. I have no idea what kind of spell it was used for—only that it's extremely powerful. We'll need to approach this delicately," he elaborated, sounding as constipated as ever.

"Don't worry," I folded my arms over my chest, giving Mac my most badass grin. "Delicate is my middle name," I reassured him.

"Your middle name's Milina," Alden snorted.

 _Ugghhh! He doesn't need to_ tell _people that!_ "Shut your cake hole!" I punched him.

First of all, forget he said that. Second of all, all the gargoyles in the garden sprang to life in a fit of rage at the noise and started attacking us. Third of all...you know what? Never mind, let's get back to the attacking gargoyles.

" _What did you do?!_ " Mac lamented, as a trio of gargoyles marched towards us ominously. I sized them up. It was obvious that while they didn't have much going on in the speed department, if they were able to land a hit on you with those beefy arms and blunt axes, it was gonna hurt like nothing else.

Of course, that wouldn't be an issue as long as I kept out of arm's reach, right?

 _Wrong._

One of the gargoyles shot off a _Blam Blazer_.

"I'll see if I can disrupt their magical field," Mac said wearily. "If push comes to shove, I can hold them off with a spell of my own, but I'd prefer it if you handled the fighting so I can concentrate!"

"What?! But —" Alden stammered.

"No time to argue!" I shot back as the other two gargoyles fired off a pair of _Rune Flares_. Two lances of flame energy sailed towards our heads. I hastily unsheathed my enchanted sword and deflected the spells by hitting them, but the force of both of them making contact with my blade at once was enough to send me several yards backwards, where I stumbled against the wall.

"Sis! _Look out!"_ Alden hollered, scrambling up onto B.D.'s shoulders for safety. Another mighty gargoyle towered over me, snorting heavily through its enormous nostrils. It rose its axe and prepared to strike.

In a panic, I cast Mega Brand _._ It's a smaller, more concentrated version of the Dil Brand spell, which I'd gone for in the interest of not blowing any of my companions sky-high. Unfortunately for me, it wasn't enough to put the gargoyle out of commission, either. It did, however, knock him (or her? Can you really tell with gargoyles?) to the ground. So I decided to do a little landscaping of my own.

" _Bephis Bring!"_ I targeted the ground as I uttered the Chaos Words, and the earth under the gargoyle's feet began to crumble into a pit trap. If you asked me, the gaping hole was an improvement to the decor. A well-dug pit trap gives any outdoor environment a certain _je ne sais quois_.

Inside the hole, the gargoyle flapped its ample wings to take off. I wasn't going to let it escape!

" _Freeze arrow!"_ I chanted. The ice spread across the gargoyle's stone form, freezing it into the pit. Then, I unsheathed my sword and rushed the ice block, shattering the gargoyle into several pieces.

Meanwhile, Alden and B.D. had fought their way to the other side of the garden, drawing some of the gargoyles' fire away from me. With his supreme agility, it was easy for my brother to weave in and out of the slow but beefy gargoyles and elude even their magical attacks. But if things got hairy, B.D.'s muscle power and ability to cast lower-level spells came in handy.

" _Nah-nah-nah-nah-nah_! You can't catch me!" taunted Alden as he cartwheeled between two gargoyles and narrowly missed being hit with a fireball. _Ugh, what is he, five?!_

As B.D. quickly extinguished the fire with a _Mos Varim,_ I shook my head at my brother's childish antics.

Macrius shouted something at me from a few yards away, but I couldn't hear him over the sound of beating wings. Three airborne gargoyles plopped down into a ring formation, surrounding me. One of the three triangular segments of the stone nonagram began glowing an eerie shade of pale blue, as did the gargoyles' eyes. Sensing the danger, Brenda lit up as well.

All three enemies held their hands over their heads, charging up energy for a spell. Even without hearing any sort of incantation, I could tell it was _Dynast Brass,_ mainly because of the pentagram forming among the three surrounding gargoyles. In a few seconds, the area within the pentagram would be hit by lightning from above.

If I tried to Levitate away, they'd just shoot me down, so I needed to fight my way out from the inside, fast. If I could just take a single gargoyle out of the formation, I'd have room to run away from the area of effect. " _Swordacceptmywill!"_ I blurted out as fast as I could while simultaneously performing an oblique upwards cut. The trick there, by the way, is to cut from the shoulder or wrist, and not the elbow, in a swift motion that uses the blade's center of percussion. The center of percussion is always located somewhere along the last third of your blade, but it's different with every sword. Usually it's a little tricky for me to figure out, but with Brenda-or...should I start calling her _Calibren_?-it had always felt pretty natural.

 _Smash!_ My blade rang out as it made an incision in the gargoyle's chest. It wasn't enough to cut through its entire solid rock body, but the force of the blow made the gargoyle lose its footing. There was the chance I'd been hoping for. I used the newly-formed gap between gargoyles to escape the magic circle.

Just as I did, the lightning struck. Casting a spell like that creates a barrier that protects the caster, and _only_ the caster, from its effects. But since the gargoyle I'd injured had stopped casting, he didn't get the benefit of the caster's barrier. _Blam!_ The magical lightning tore him to shreds.

His two buddies didn't look too happy. (Then again, do gargoyles _ever_ look happy?) They turned on me as I ran and began casting another spell.

 _Uh-oh! Looks like Mac and I are both in the line of fire here. I'd better cover him,_ I thought. If nothing else, I could cast a wind barrier. But to my surprise, Mac had a plan of his own.

"Stand aside, kid!" He shouted as I neared the corner area where he was working. "I have an idea." I sure hoped that idea involved us both _not_ being killed by the _Dolph Strash_ that the gargoyles seemed to be casting. I was about to tell him to leave the fighting to me, but he was already casting a spell himself. A spell I'd never seen or even heard of before.

" _Thou who gleams upon the frozen seas,_

 _Dragon of the North,_

 _Lost in the labyrinth of ice,_

 _Sleeping in the souls of the divine,_

 _Bless me with your wisdom and might,_

 _And together we shall deliver salvation!_

 _Ragradia Rune!"_

A deep blue shockwave in the form of what appeared to be a thin, spearlike shape _,_ shot out from Macrius's outstretched arms. It raced across the garden, on a collision course with the _Dolph Strash_ the gargoyles had just fired off.

Before I could even open my mouth to say " _What the heck was that,"_ , I felt a hand push me from behind. " _Get down_!" Mac shouted. And with that— _FSSSSSSSST!_ The two spells collided and reacted like oil and water, hissing angrily and nearly tripling in size as they hit head-on. The resulting ball of energy expanded and burnt out spectacularly, like a firework fizzling out of the sky.

The force of the _Ragradia Rune_ had thrown the spell back in the two gargoyles' faces, and they were now not so much gargoyles as piles of rubble.

Well, color me impressed. I knew you could combine magic, but not like _that._ Maybe Mac _was_ more than a wimpy, pencil-pushing brainiac...although he still had a long way to go if he wanted to make it onto my _Top 10 Old Guys_ list.

On the other side of the garden, B.D. had used himself as a shield to protect Alden from the falling rubble that had resulted from the spell fusion. He seemed like he'd sustained a few bruises in the process.

"Thanks, man. I owe you one," I heard my brother say to the Brass Demon.

Mac looked up at me wearily. "That's nearly half of them destroyed. They're being controlled in groups of three by the three separate magical fields that overlap to form the nonagram."

I nodded. A nine-pointed star is really just three overlapping triangles. Each one must have had its own magical properties. If I were to wager a guess, I'd say they represented the three most widely-known types of magic: White, Black, and Shamanic.

Mac held his hand over one of the glowing rocks in the formations and muttered something under his breath, then turned to me again.

"There's not a whole lot of time to explain, but when I manipulate one field to make it weaker, the others get amplified. I need you to target those two," he pointed to a gargoyle in the southwest corner of the garden and another in the northwest. "And once you do, it'll be safe for me to deactivate the other three. Is that clear?"

"Crystal," I nodded. "See ya later, Mac," I trotted over to the other side of the garden, sword drawn and ready to whoop some gargoyle butt.

First, I had to relay the plan to the rest of my team. " That's your target!" I said discreetly to B.D. and Alden. "I'm gonna take care of the one in the northwest corner, and then Mac can shut down the grid to neutralize the other three," I whispered.

"Roger that!" Alden saluted. "B.D., let's initiate Operation Punchyface!" B.D. nodded in reply as I headed up to meet my opponent.

Alden slithered off to conceal himself. As you already know, my brother is quick on his feet and great at hiding, but not the strongest guy you'll ever meet. He's also pretty limited in magical ability, though he swears he makes up for it with his roguish good looks. ( _Whatever_.) But he knows how to combine stealth and the element of surprise to take the enemy off guard with a sneak attack. In the dimly lit garden, there were plenty of shadows to facilitate that.

An iron dagger, infused with willpower, came zipping out from behind the shadow of a boulder. _Thwack!_ It sunk into the shoulder of the southwest facing gargoyle and stayed there. The gargoyle turned around and swatted at it as if it were a particularly pesky mosquito. _Zing!_ Three more daggers came gliding through the air, sticking the gargoyle in the back like a pincushion. The beast turned around again to dislodge them, when—

 _Slam!_ B.D. took the gargoyle off guard as it looked away, pinning it to the ground in a full body tackle. B.D. slammed his fist into the gargoyle's face, wincing in recoil—yeah, maybe punching a rock isn't such a grand idea. (So much for "Operation Punchyface.") As soon as B.D. realized his mistake, he simply cast _Damu Brass._ It's an Earth spell usually reserved for busting open walls, but it can also bust open a gargoyle due to its similar composition.

Meanwhile, I decided to take my opponent head-on. I'm really not big on sneaking around like my brother, and while I'm (thankfully) not as brawny as B.D., I have a _little_ more going on in the magic and weapons department.

"Hey, marble mouth! Is it ugly in here, or is it just you?" I taunted as I charged my target.

...kind of an aside here, but I think I need to work on my trash talk. Mom says half the battle is fought in the mind. Sometimes it's hard to come up with something good on the spot though, you know? Especially when you've got all this adrenaline going from the fight. (Also, does giving the enemy a tongue-lashing make me look cool, or am I just coming off like a total jerk? These are the questions we really need to ask ourselves when faced with a deadly seven-foot-tall magically animated gargoyle.)

Anyway, the gargoyle saw me coming and took off flying. _Not so fast!_ I thought, but as I was thinking that, it had already started blitzing me with _Flare Bit._ As the barrage of tiny, exploding fire spells kicked up dust around me, I decided to get an aerial advantage, too.

"B.D., cover me from the ground!" I instructed our behemoth friend as I took to the air. " _Levitation_!"

I sailed up and away from the cloud of dust, and once the gargoyle was in my sights again, I directed my flight path straight towards it. Unfortunately, it saw me coming, and was ready with a _freeze arrow_ in its hand. As I veered off to the left, narrowly missing a weathervane on top of the mansion, I could feel an icy chill down my side. The spell glanced my left arm. I uttered a few choice words (which under any normal circumstances would surely get me grounded, so I'm _not_ repeating them, okay?) and took cover behind a steeple tower. I'd have to cast a healing spell if I wanted to use that arm for anything.

The last thing I expected was to see someone else sitting in the shadow of the steeple tower. But there she was, draped in the same cloak she'd worn on the night I'd first saved her from those bandits. Ellerin, the Guildmaster's assistant.

I think she was more surprised to see me than I was to see her. She dropped the spyglass she was holding, and it clickity-clacked its way down several rows of bronzed roof tiles before it plummeted to the ground.

"Wh...wha- _you_ —!" She stammered. I hastily tried to shush her as I cast Recovery on myself. If the noise from her spyglass hadn't alerted the gargoyle to our whereabouts, her talking sure would. (See, this is why I hate hiding during a fight! It gets so tense.)

She lowered her voice but kept right on talking anyway. "You're not supposed to be up here, human!" she hissed.

 _Yeah? Neither are you, probably,_ I silently groaned.

"Er, that is—!" She cleared her throat and pointed at me dramatically. "What I meant to say is... _give me that sword if you value your life_!"

 _Stop talking if you value yours!_ I pantomimed wildly. It didn't work. With a _Damu Brass_ from the gargoyle, the steeple tower came crashing down around us. I cast a _Ray Wing_ to engulf Ellerin and myself in a bubble of safety and keep us afloat.

Yeah, yeah, I know she'd basically just threatened my life, but I felt sort of sorry for her. She wasn't even concealing a weapon or anything. And her threat sounded more spastic than scary. It was kind of pathetic, really.

The gargoyle shot off another round of _Burst Flare_ s. The spell made contact with my _Ray Wing_ and bounced harmlessly off the surface. _Ray Wing_ has the double benefit of allowing the caster to carry passengers while simultaneously creating a protective magical barrier, but it comes at a price. It takes a lot more concentration than simply levitating oneself. So I wasn't able to counter with a spell of my own. But I did have a sword, a magical bubble, and a lot of willpower to burn.

"Sword," I shouted as I raced towards the gargoyle. "Accept my will!"

"Oh! That's—!" Ellerin uttered in surprise as Calibren illuminated.

I swooped in and performed a thrust from the right. Reading my move, the gargoyle met my blade with a lateral parry from his axe, but the power of my sword was too great for his stone weapon to handle. It cracked and fragmented into pieces, leaving the gargoyle unarmed. In a panic, it cast a fireball, which of course did nothing. But that gave me an opening—

" _Hya_!" I struck hard and fast with a vertical downwards cut. Being in the air gave me the leverage I needed to crack the gargoyle's solid granite skull, and it crash-landed back in the garden. The force of the fall was enough to smash it.

"Hit it, Mac!" I shouted, and with a few quick spells from our sandwich dispenser turned savior, the remaining three gargoyles became lifeless statues once again. Our little scuffle was over. Well, _mostly_ over.

"How dare you trap me with your sorcery!" Ellerin fumed. "Put me down at once!" she demanded, grabbing me by the ascot. _Jeez_ , when the Guildmaster didn't have her on a leash, she sure was a piece of work. This was the second time I'd saved her life and she was acting like I'd done her dirty when I hardly even _knew_ her!

"Didn't you hear me, human? I said! _Put! Me! Down!"_

"Okay," I shrugged, not really in the mood to argue. I stopped casting _Ray Wing_.

" _Wait_! That's not what I—!" The Dark Elf protested, but it was too late.

"Heads up, B.D.!" I shouted down below as I propelled myself back up with _Levitation._ The Brass Demon jumped up and caught her in his arms.

I lowered myself back down gently into the mess of a backyard as Macrius stormed up to the B-team and Ellerin.

" _You!_ " Cried Macrius. "You're Rivera's right-hand goon!"

"A...A _goon_?! How dare you! If anyone here deserves to be called a goon in this situation, it's _you,_ you, you—you third-rate book jockey!" The Dark Elf retorted vitriolically. "I knew you were jealous that Mister Rivera selected me as his assistant, but I never thought you would stoop to being so _petty_ about it!"

" _Selected_ you? _Right_. More like you _begged_ him to take you on, you brown-nosing know-nothing! Pathetic, if you ask me!" Mac spat.

 _Hoo boy._ Again with the guild politics. This was about to get ugly, fast. B.D. shot me a worried look as Ellerin tried to wriggle out of his arms. I shrugged, not really sure what would end this conversation.

Alden whistled sharply. "Children, children, let's remember our manners," he smiled nervously. "What Mac here means to say is—it's _great_ to see you, Miss Ellerin," he elbowed Mac in the guts. "What a nice coincidence that we're all here, huh?"

While Ellerin might have been disarmed by my brother's manners, Mac wasn't taking the hint. "Like _Hell_ it's a coincidence!" he fumed. "You were the one behind the gargoyle attack, weren't you?"

"Of course not!" Ellerin puffed out her cheeks indignantly. "They are a security system devised by the Great Zerramond to keep out common thieves like _you!_ "

"Hmph," Macrius quirked his eyebrows, his lip trembling. "So you were just casually taking a stroll along Zerramond's _rooftop_ in the middle of the night when we tripped the alarm?"

"Of course not, you fool!" Ellerin jerked her head towards the librarian. "Mister Rivera asked me to keep an eye on things here," she scoffed.

"A- _ha!_ _Hah_! Spy on _me,_ will he?" Mac brandished an index finger. _Whoa, careful there, Tiger, you might put somebody's eye out._ "I _knew_ he was out to steal my research!"

"Don't flatter yourself, human!" Ellerin balled up her fists. "This has nothing to do with your so-called research. I was spying on _them!_ " She indicated my brother and I, then realizing her blunder, quickly slammed both fists over her mouth in a fit of embarrassment. Wow, all you had to do was piss her off a little and she'd spill the beans. Not a very good quality in a spy.

"Well, now that we've established the obvious," I rolled my eyes, "Can we move on? B.D., put her down. She's unarmed," I tapped my foot on the ground. "Now look, Ellie," I said evenly.

"My name is not—!" the elf protested. I kept going.

"Why don't you head back to the guild? I really don't care if you tell Rivera we trashed the place at this point," I shrugged, "He knows we _need_ that manuscript or the world could be destroyed, and we plan to get our hands on it any way we can," I explained. "But it's probably not safe for you to tag along with us if you've got no weapons or magic."

Ellerin cast her eyes to the ground, unclenched and re-clenched her fists, and muttered something to herself in Elvish.

"Translation, please?" Alden requested.

The Dark Elf looked straight at me. "The Legendary Sword, Calibren. It does not belong to you, False Knight Of Ceiphied," she annunciated with a quiet intensity that caught me off guard.

"Wuh—uh, w-well yeah, but Aunt Luna _said_ I could borrow it if I had to help save the world!"

"Your _aunt?_ " Mac interrupted, going slack-jawed. "You mean you two are related to—?" He pointed between my brother and I.

"I'm afraid so, Mac old boy," Alden patted the sorcerer's shoulder sympathetically. "Better be nice to us from now on if you know what's good for you. 'Cause if our Auntie doesn't get you, our mom sure will…"

As Mac turned a fun shade of blue, Ellerin continued locking eyes with me. "Nor does it belong to your _real_ Knight of Ceiphied," she said with contempt. "Not even the greatest among humans could hope to understand the sword's true power. Even Mister Rivera, after all his years of research, cannot fathom it."

"Okay, we get it, we're all too dumb to understand this thing," I rolled my eyes in exasperation. "Why are you telling us?"

"Because," Ellerin continued, "Upon your completion of the mission, Mister Rivera is prepared to offer you a large sum of coins in exchange for the sword. But…no matter how much he offers you, you must not...you...no matter how tempting an offer..." she trailed off, her voice shaking with an unreadable emotion.

Hah! Yeah, _that's_ a good one. I sure wasn't tempted to think about selling the sword, not even for a millisecond. She had _no_ idea what Aunt Luna would do to me if I ever sold her favorite sword.

"But you _will_ give the sword to me," Ellerin continued. "It is a sacred treasure of my hometown, stolen from us many years ago. It belongs in the hands of the Dark Elves."

Alden winced and fidgeted around. "Yeah, thaaaaat's gonna be a problem," he said uncomfortably. "It's not just our Aunt's sword. It's her _favorite_ sword. I'm really sorry about your hometown, but there's just _no_ way," he shook his head. "We _really_ don't wanna be skinned alive for giving it away."

"Uh-huh. For once, I agree with him," I concurred with my brother whole-heartedly.

"Then you are both fools," Ellerin disparaged. "I, Ellerin of Emerald Village, will follow you until your dying day. You will not eat, you will not rest, you will not have a moment's peace until the Holy Sword is mine!" she raged.

"Eh, okay," Alden looked at me with a shrug.

"We can live with that," I shrugged back. "It sounds like a drag, but I can one _thousand_ percent guarantee it's better than crossing Auntie and facing the consequences."

"Hm. So the Knight really _is_ as fearsome as the legends say," Macrius straightened his ponytail.

B.D. nodded. We lapsed into an awkward silence.

"So, does that mean you're coming inside the mansion with us too?" Alden asked resignedly.

Ellerin took a giant step towards my brother, towered over him, and simply snorted in reply.

"All right," Alden deadpanned. "Mac, you're promoted. Give her the sandwiches."

* * *

The mansion was eerily silent inside as we crept up the stairs. Not even a sound (or a smell) from the fish butler. And it was pitch dark, to boot. I couldn't even see my bangs in front of my face, much less any of The Great Sorcerer Zerramond's interior decor. But given his taste in horticulture, I wasn't exactly dying to find out what was on _this_ side of the mansion walls. I stumbled along, trying to feel my way through.

On the other hand, my brother was practically skipping down the hallway. Thieves are usually known for their perceptiveness in low light settings, I guess, but I have _no_ idea where he learned it from. It bugs the hell out of me, actually, because when I asked him about it, he'd just smiled like a buffoon and said, "A great thief _never_ reveals his secrets!"

Ellerin also had no trouble seeing through the darkness, which is more or less what you'd expect from any kind of elf. Which left Mac and me in the Stumbling Around Club, since B.D. was keeping a lookout outside. (He was too big to fit through the window, anyway.)

" _Ow!_ Watch where you're going, geezer!" I hissed in whatever direction I thought Mac had just stepped on my toe from.

"Same to you, kid! Stop treading on my mantle!" Macrius griped.

"It's not _my_ fault all you old sorcerers have no fashion sense!" I grumbled. "You know what?! Screw it. I don't care if we get caught, I'm casting Lighting," I decided as we approached the end of the first floor hallway. I illuminated the area with the light spell, just enough to help me see in front of my face.

Everyone stopped dead in their tracks. " _Whoa,"_ Alden uttered.

With even that sliver of light in the room, it was plain to see that we were in some sort of art gallery. I'm no connoisseur of the artsy fartsy, but I'll tell you this much—Zerramond must have been filthy stinking rich to afford them. Right off the bat, I could see a few pieces that even _I_ recognized—a famous painting of a marketplace from the lost duchy of Letidius, painted 400 years ago; a statue of the sage Rezo healing the blind, and…

"Fascinating," Macrius gasped. "It's Renfried's _Adrift Upon The Sea Of Chaos…_ "

"It's who's what upon the _where_ now?" Alden scratched his head, ambling over to Mac for a closer look. I followed behind him, and Ellie behind me.

The painting Mac was admiring was large enough to take up the whole wall, and I have to say, it was too weird for my tastes. Intense waves of black and gold swirled around four scattered discs, and in the center, the inverted figure of a woman in white, with long blond hair, was in a sort of freefall. She had a complexion the color of snow. Her eyes were closed, and her right arm was extended towards one of the four discs.

"I see," Alden stroked his chin in contemplation. "It's like...it's like a visual representation of the super-ego juxtaposed with the chaotic nature of the subconscious mind, and those cinnamon buns represent human desire," he opined. "I can dig it."

All of us stared at my brother as if he'd just sprouted an extra set of limbs.

" _No!"_ Macrius planted his head in his hands, disgusted. "What are they _teaching_ you kids in school today?"

It was a rhetorical question, but that never stopped Alden. "I dunno, math and stuff mostly. I don't really pay that much attention."

"Well pay attention _now_!" Mac snapped. "The artwork of Serin Renfried dates back to the time of the War of Resurrection. Some say she was an oracle, who could paint depictions of battles before they even occured," he explained. "Her works have an otherworldly, surreal quality to them, but if you pay attention, you'll see connections to the gods and legends of this world," he went on. "And in case you weren't paying attention to the title, _this_ one depicts the four worlds standing among the Sea of Chaos."

Oh yeah. _That_ old legend. How could I forget? When we were kids, Mom had explained it to me and Alden this one time when we were fighting over the last waffle. You ready for a fun-tactic family flashback? I've got a million of 'em.

 _Mom stabbed the golden waffle emphatically with a fork and held it upside-down in mid-air. Alden and I whined as the food slipped out of our grasp. "Pipe down already!" Mom shushed us. "Now take a look at this, and you might just learn something," she'd said. "The world we live on is shaped just like this waffle. We're right here on the top, see? And on the bottom, there's a big pillar holding us up, just like the fork," she gestured._

" _Thousands of years ago, countless worlds just like ours sprang up out of the Sea of Chaos, and the Gods and Mazoku of those worlds duked it out to determine if the world would be saved or destroyed. Our world was saved by the Flare Dragon, Ceiphied."_

" _But what happened to the worlds if the Mazoku won?" I asked, entranced._

" _ **This**_ _!" Mom exclaimed, and proceeded to eat the whole waffle._

Thinking back on it, I really did learn something that day. I learned that Mom always gets the last waffle.

"Okay, so the black and gold stuff is the Sea of Chaos, and the four discs are the worlds on it. That kind of makes sense," I thought out loud. "But who's the lady supposed to be?"

Macrius nodded. "Ah. An interesting question, and a topic of scholarly debate," he replied. "This painting dates back to the defeat of Ruby Eye during the Demon War, twelve hundred years ago. Early historians believed that the woman in white represented a piece of the Water Dragon King, sinking back into the Sea of Chaos after using all his power to seal Shabranigdu. But after about two hundred years passed, scholars believed her to be a different entity: the embodiment of the Sea of Chaos itself. In other words…"

"The Lord Of Nightmares," I nodded. I'd heard stories about it from Mom, too. The most fearsome god of all, the mother of all creation, whose entire being manifested itself as the Sea of Chaos, a void of nothingness and destruction that flowed around the four remaining worlds. (Well, when we were little, she'd also told us that the Lord Of Nightmares came to punish kids who misbehaved, but I was starting to have my doubts about that.)

Alden squinted. "The Lord Of Nightmares, huh? I dunno, she doesn't look so scary to me."

"Best hold your tongue, human," Ellie warned. "You know not of whom you speak."

Macrius cleared his throat. "Well, it's hard to say _who_ it really represents. The most recent research favors the theory that the Lord Of Nightmares is, in fact, the Sea of Chaos itself. So the identity of the woman in the painting remains a mystery," he concluded.

"Ha! You fool," Ellie chortled. "You do not recognize her? You humans really _are_ simple-minded. The identity of the woman in the painting is…"

We all learned in expectantly and held our breath, awaiting a revelation that would no doubt blow our minds. "The identity of the woman in the painting is n-none of your business!" Ellie barked, blushing at all the attention we were suddenly giving her. The rest of us heaved a collective sigh.

"If you don't have anything to add to the conversation, then I suggest you save your voice and stick to handing the sandwiches, sandwich-handler!" Mac sniped.

" _Why you_ —!" Ellerin exploded.

 _Here we go again,_ I thought.

"Uhhh, I have another question! About the painting!" Alden quickly butted in. The other two turned to face him, surprised. "What's the brown handprint represent?"

"A handprint?" Mac furrowed his eyebrows, confused. "There is no handprint."

"Yeah there is, _right_ there. On the lady's face," Alden grabbed my hand that was casting the light spell and nudged it closer to the painting. "Look!"

"Oh, I see," Mac adjusted his glasses and stared. "Well this is...it appears to be, err…"

"Chocolate pudding," a silky-smooth answered us from behind. We all practically jumped out of our skin as the voice went on talking. "The Great Zerramond is terribly fond of sweets."

In my panic to turn around, I put out my light spell, but with a snap of his fingers, the owner of the voice had all the oil lamps in the room going full blast. He was a pretty average-looking guy, about 20 years old or so, average height, average weight, average haircut. He wore the robes typical of a priest and the biggest shit-eating grin I'd ever seen.

"Ah, that's much better, don't you think?" The priest took a good, long look around the room, admiring the ambience while we all stood there, agape. "Now come along, everyone. Zerramond has been expecting you."

Mac, Ellie and I looked at each other mistrustfully. What was this guy's deal? He'd just caught us breaking and entering and he was acting like we'd just dropped in for some tea and cookies. Could it _be_ more obvious that we'd walked into a trap?

"Run for it!" shouted Alden, subtle as ever. "It's a ma—ma— _ma—"_ he stammered.

"A man of impeccable taste?" The priest's smile brightened a few watts. "Why thank you."

" _It's a_ _ **Mazoku**_ _! He's gonna_ **KILL** _us!"_ Alden blurted out.

The priest chuckled. "Young man, if I'd _wanted_ to kill you…" his smile grew to proportions I just wasn't comfortable with, "You'd already be dead. But _do_ follow me to the library before I change my mind."

We all looked to Alden, who gulped deeply and moped along behind the priest as he walked jauntily through the doorway. The rest of us followed suit.

Don't you hate that sinking feeling when things go from _bad_ to _catastrophic?_ I started to have second thoughts about my recent life choices as we silently followed the priest through the winding passages of Casa Zerramond.

"It's been a long time, hasn't it, Mr. Alden?" The priest chatted away, as though my brother were _not_ on the verge of peeing his pants in terror. "My, how you've grown!"

To my surprise, Alden started to look more angry than terrified. "No thanks to _you_ , you maniac!" he thundered. "I was _this close_ to being worm food because of that stunt you pulled!"

...oh. The "Mazoku Incident" nobody at home liked to talk about. I guess Alden and this priest had met before, and there was some bad blood between them. Well, at least as far as my bro was concerned. The priest was still shrugging it off as though it'd been a fun frolic in the woods.

"Well, it's all water under the bridge now," the priest-slash-Mazoku-slash-maniac shrugged. "Here you are, safe and sound!"

"Not for long, I'll bet," Alden muttered as he crossed his arms and sulked.

"I'm kind of afraid to ask, but who the hell _is_ that?" I nudged my brother.

"I have to admit I'm curious myself," whispered Mac. "Is this joker _really_ a Mazoku?"

Ellie said something derisive in Elvish. We ignored her.

"Yeah, and not just your _average_ invincibly tough Mazoku either," Alden griped. "This guy is—"

"Xelloss the Priest," the alleged Mazoku butted in. "At your service."

Okay, now _there_ was a name I recognized. I've sat through my share of Mom's long, drawn-out stories, and I can tell you _this_ much: Xelloss, the only servant of Greater Beast, wasn't a guy you wanted to be enemies with. Which is weird, because he looked more liked he belonged on the cover of _Funny Jokes Monthly Digest_ than on the field of battle.

"I see that you have some questions," Xelloss continued.

"A few, yeah," I admitted. "Why are you here? Shouldn't you be blowing up an army of dragons or something?"

"Not at the moment," Xelloss replied politely. "Just like you, I have some official business with Zerramond."

"What _kind_ of business?" Alden asked suspiciously.

"Well, you see…" the priest began. He acted as if he was trying to find the right words. We followed him in silent suspense. "How do I put it…?"

Finally, after a full minute and a half, he finished a sentence. "It's a secret."

"Oh, come on!" I groaned.

"I'm certain Zerramond will be more helpful to you in that regard," he added. "And here we are! The library." With a flick of his wrist, Xelloss opened the heavy mahogany double doors without even touching them.

 _Show-off._

"Ladies and gentlemen, may I present to you my longtime associate, The Great Sorcerer Zerramond," Xelloss said with a flourish.

The rest of us peered around the door carefully, half expecting to be ambushed. As we crept across the creaky floor, there was no sign of a sorcerer. But someone had definitely been busy in here. Papers, books, pens, and inkwells were scattered across tables and desks. The handwriting was chicken-scratch, but ink was still fresh. The library itself rivaled the one at the guild in size. Tempted by the selection, Macrius and Ellerin both reached for a book. The same _exact_ book.

"Hands off, human! I saw it first!" Ellie grunted as she tried to wrestle the book from Mac's bony fingers.

"Haven't you ever heard of respecting your elders?!" Mac shot back.

" _I_ am older than _you,_ human!" Ellie replied, reddening.

"Oh yeah?! Can you even _read_ runes?" Mac taunted.

"My people _invented_ runes, you ignorant cad!" Ellie retorted. "No one needs _your_ third-rate translations!"

"Let's just leave them alone," Alden grabbed me by the wrist and kept walking.

"Maybe if we're lucky, they'll kill each other," I agreed. Actually, the sounds of bickering made the library seem a little less vacant and intimidating. I was the teensiest bit grateful for it. We continued to search the library amid the noisy clamor of voices.

"Hey! Down here!" came a third voice from below. There, underneath the table, wearing the ugliest footie pajamas I'd ever seen, was the last person I'd probably expected.

"Olivia?!" Alden exclaimed. "Long time no see, kid," he extended his palm to help her up. She dragged a blanket and a book with her as she stumbled to her feet.

"Thanks," Olivia chirped. "I was waiting for you. Torgo told me you knocked on the door earlier, but I wasn't home. Did you come over to play?"

" _Hell no!"_ I said. My distaste for Olivia hadn't faded with time. If anything, I was even angrier at her _now_ than I was when she'd showed me up with that Dragon Slave. "We're looking for a great sorcerer, not a shrimp!" I exclaimed.

Olivia blinked up at me with her stupid doe eyes. "Okay."

It was so quiet, you could hear a pixie sneeze. " _So?"_ I asked impatiently. "Where is he?"

"Where is who?" Olivia asked.

" _The Great Sorcerer Zerramond_!" I exploded. Seriously, just because _she_ didn't have anything better to do didn't mean _I_ had time to play games.

"Right here," Olivia answered.

" _Where_ here?" I gritted my teeth. "Where _specifically_ is this Great Sorcerer?" If I tried any harder to ask nicely, I was sure my head was going to pop off.

Alden smirked. "Pretty slow on the uptake there, aren't ya, sis," he shook his head.

"Yeah, I'll say," Olivia agreed. "Is she always like this?"

"Pretty much," Alden shrugged. "You're gonna need to spell it out for her or we could be here all night."

"Explain _what_?! How annoying you both are?" I scowled.

"No. That it's _me. I'm_ the Great Sorcerer Zerramond," Olivia said slowly and clearly.

"Yeah?! And I'm the Crown Princess of Saillune!" I rolled my eyes.

Alden crossed his arms. "Did you, like, miss the part where she blew up a whole mountain?" He asked me sarcastically. "She _is_ pretty great."

"Hey, thanks!" Olivia beamed at Alden. "I think you're great too, Big Bro."

" _Yeah,_ but—!" I protested. "Big" Bro here was missing some pretty _big_ pieces of information. Zerramond had been writing monographs since before either of our _parents_ were even born. Olivia was younger than _we_ were.

"You'll have to excuse her," Alden said soothingly to Olivia, leading her away by the arm. "She's _extremely_ jealous of your powers."

"It's okay," Olivia shrugged. "I get that a lot."

"So, let me guess. The Great Sorcerer Zerramond is a title you inherited, right? Like a family thing?" Alden asked, walking Olivia towards a towering bookcase. "I totally get that vibe from you. I, too, was born into a big deal family," he said, in a pretending-to-be-burdened-by-having-famous-parents sort of way. "So I know another kid destined for greatness when I see one."

 _Stop tooting your own damned horn! And why am I suddenly not a part of this conversation?!_

Olivia followed him down the row of shelves. "Mmm...yeah. My dad was the first Zerramond. It used to be me, my mom, my dad, and my grandpa. And then it was just me and my grandpa. And now it's just me," Olivia replied, sounding sad for the first time since I'd met her. "So I took up Dad and Grandpa's research," she explained. " _Some_ body had to."

"Wow," I uttered. "Um...that's rough, kid. I'm really sorry," I said. And I meant it. It didn't mean I was going to go easy on her from now on or anything! It's just...I can't imagine living in a world without my whole family in it. It must've taken some real guts. I could at least respect that.

Olivia turned around and smiled sympathetically. "It's okay! I have lots of friends," she changed the subject. "Like my butler Torgo, and the dog who lives near the bakery, and um... Xelloss." She ticked off a finger for each one. (Ouch, only three friends? And Xelloss ranked lower than the _dog_ …?)

Alden almost died. "Your _friend?! Xelloss?!_ Listen to me, kid," he took Olivia by the shoulders and practically shook her, "You can _not,"_ he emphasized, "under _any_ circumstances," he emphasized some more, "trust Xelloss. _Ever._ "

"I know," Olivia shrugged. "But he's still my friend."

"Dear gods, _why?_ " Alden lamented. "You'd be safer being friends with a scorpion!" he hammered his fist into his palm.

"Well, maybe," Olivia agreed hesitantly, "But he did a _really_ big favor for my grandpa before," she explained. "And besides, he helps me a lot with my research."

"Oh, right. Research," I mulled over the situation we were in. "We need to talk about that." I still doubted Olivia had half a brain for magical research, but there was at least a chance she could help us with the mission. If anyone knew where the Magnus Manuscript was in this huge library, it was probably her.

I took the letter from Blanche out of my pocket and tried to uncrumple it. (What? You think _you'd_ be able to keep it pristine after a fight with an enormous chicken and nine bloodthirsty gargoyles? Yeah right!) But before I could show Olivia the summons and the royal orders from Blanche, the paper was swiftly snatched out of my grasp. I whipped around to see Xelloss standing behind me with the paper in his hands. _When did he even_ get _here?_

"Hey!" I objected. "Hands off, Chuckles!" But the priest had already maneuvered around us to Olivia's side, without ever taking his eyes off the page.

"Ah," Xelloss uttered, "I see. Well, how fortunate. It appears we might be able to help each other out," he nodded, then handed the letter over to Olivia.

" _Us?_ Help _you?_ " Alden turned up his nose. "As if we'd ever—!"

Olivia looked up from the letter. "Before you say no, just listen, okay?" she implored. Conflicted, my brother fell silent. "I'll give you Grandpa's manuscript," she continued. "You can't keep it. But you can _borrow_ it," she clarified. "Even though I know you're not the _real_ Knight of Sea Freed."

Xelloss leaned down and whispered something in the girl's ear. "Um, I mean _Ceiphied_ ," she corrected herself with a shrug. "But there's something you need to do for us, too."

 _Ugh, seriously?! It's like the mission that wouldn't end! Doesn't anyone just give out simple fetch quests anymore?_ I sighed. "Yeah, what?" I asked crankily.

"Grandpa's treasures," Olivia answered in a pained voice. "The God's Eyes Talismans. You remember them from before, right?" the girl fidgeted.

"The four jewel thingies from the cave?" Alden quirked an eyebrow. "What about 'em?"

"I'm afraid they've been stolen again," Xelloss butted in. "They are artifacts of great importance to Miss Zerramond and myself," he added. "We would appreciate your cooperation in tracking them down."

"Okay. Whatever. But I get to ask some questions about them," I demanded. "And if _you_ don't answer," I narrowed my eyes at Xelloss, " _I_ don't help you. We all clear?"

Olivia looked pleadingly up at the priest. He looked from Olivia, to me, to Alden, and back to me again.

"Fair enough," Xelloss said reluctantly. "I will answer to the best of my ability."

"First of all, what _are_ these so-called talismans?" I eyeballed Xellos, "and why do they keep getting stolen?" I shot a glare at Olivia.

"Simply put, they are magic amplifiers," Xelloss replied.

"My grandpa made them!" Olivia chimed in. "He said they're special, just like me," she bragged.

' _Special' is one way to put it…_

"So, let me guess," I racked my brain, "They each call upon the power of some higher being, right? I've heard of something like that before…" _from Mom, naturally._

"Correct. They are unique in that they are the only known talismans in existence to call upon the gods of the four worlds in order to increase the power of ordinary spells."

"Hold it!" I pressed. "That doesn't sound so unique to me. As a matter of fact, this sounds like a ripoff of another set of magical artifacts I've heard about," I folded my arms. "Does the name _Demon's Blood Talismans_ mean anything to you?"

"Ah," Xelloss smiled, "You've got me there. So you _do_ pay attention to your mother's stories."

"Occasionally," I shrugged. " _Any_ way. What's the connection?"

"Both the Demon's Blood and the Gods' Eyes Talismans originated from the same source. Miss Zerramond's grandfather crafted both sets of magic amplifiers. Although different in theory and construction from the Demon's Blood Talismans, the Gods' Eyes work the same way in practice. So, imagine a Fireball with five times the destructive capacity, for instance," Xelloss elaborated.

"Whoa," I almost felt my jaw hit the floor. It was hard to wrap my brain around, honestly.

"It is unfortunate," Xelloss went on, "But although the Demon's Blood Talismans were entrusted to me by Miss Zerramond's late grandfather, they were destroyed due to...circumstances beyond my control," he said sheepishly. "Leaving the Gods' Eyes as the sole remaining artifact of their kind."

"Meaning," I concluded, "that there'd be a lot of people out to get the Gods' Eyes for themselves."

"Precisely," Xelloss nodded in agreement.

"Okay, my turn!" Alden bolstered his courage and finally spoke up again. "If they're so unique, why can't _you_ find them?" he asked the smiling priest accusingly. "Shouldn't they give off an...astral signature or something?"

"Normally, yes," Xelloss responded. "That kind of artifact is usually easily detected by a sorcerer who recognizes its unique magical output. But whoever has the Gods' Eyes right now has sealed them off from the Astral Plane completely with an anti-detection spell, or otherwise changed the way they work so that they are untraceable," he explained. "So needless to say, they must be in the possession of someone very powerful."

"Well, _that_ narrows the list down, at least," I mused. "Next question! You got any leads?"

"A few, yes. And that's where you come in," Xelloss said matter-of-factly. "Our primary suspect is a gentleman going by the name of Rasche the Ivory. It appears you have some sort of connection with him, as well."

"Rasche?" Alden raised an eyebrow. "Lady Blanche's boyfriend? You think he wants to give them to her as a present or something?"

"How should I know? I never even met the guy," I felt my expression go sour. I really didn't want to believe that someone as kind, noble, trustworthy and beautiful as Blanche would be into a guy who stole jewelry from little kids. But you had to admit, to someone who specialized in long-lost rituals and spells, a set of talismans that amplified magic would be pretty tempting. (And Blanche wasn't exactly a great judge of character, seeing as she had _me_ pegged for the Knight of Ceiphied.) It was at least worth looking into whether or not Rasche had them. And if Xelloss's hunch turned out to be correct, I'd have to break the bad news to Blanche. She definitely deserved better. Us lovely ladies need to stick up for one another, ya know?

"I can check him out," I shrugged. "If nothing else, he ought to be around when I deliver the manuscript. And I'll let you know if I notice anything suspicious," I told Olivia honestly. "That's about all I can probably do."

"Right," squeaked the pipsqueak, "That's why _I'm_ coming with you."

 _Noooooo. No way. Nuh-uh. Not happening._

I shook my head. "Nope. It's too dangerous for a kid," I reasoned, feeling my palms grow sweaty. Olivia's face fell.

"Not for a kid who can cast the _Dragon Slave_ ," Alden nagged. "Come on, can she come? _Please?"_ He used the same pleading face that he'd used on Mom when he'd asked her if he could keep the cat. _Ugh._

"Yeah, please?" Olivia mimicked. "I promise I won't slow you down or anything."

"We've got too many hangers-on as it is!" I complained. "I'm already toting along my younger brother, a Brass Demon, a hotheaded librarian, and a stalker!" I counted off.

"I'm only eight minutes younger," Alden assured Olivia out of the corner of his mouth. "Also, I'm the smart one."

"Hey, _smart one_ ," I grabbed my brother by the ear and pulled him away from his new buddy for a little side chat. "Family conference, starting now. No runts allowed."

"Ow!" Alden complained. "What's your deal, sis? She's giving us the manuscript. And she's way cooler than Mac and Ellie," he argued.

"Are you kidding?! She's friends with the guy—scratch that, the _Mazoku,_ who nearly got you killed, _and_ she's liable to blow up innocent bystanders!"

" _But she's adorable!"_

"Look, it's bad enough that we have to make a deal with her and this jokester priest to complete the mission. I am many things—a sorceress, a swordswoman, a waitress—but I am _not,_ " I articulated, "a _nanny_! I won't be held responsible for what happens to this kid!" I said, feeling like all the veins in my head were about to explode. _And besides, it's_ my _mission! I can't have her one- upping me when I've finally got a chance to prove myself here!_

"Okay, I get it," Alden nodded. "I really do. Don't worry about a thing, sis," he clapped me on the shoulder chummily. "If you won't take responsibility for Olivia," he said slowly, "Then _I_ will."

" _What?!_ You don't get it at _all!"_ I protested. But it was too late.

"Olivia!" Alden shoved me aside like yesterday's fashion and turned to the kid, who was playing with her fingers. "How would you like me—the one and only Thief of Justice—" he paused for dramatic emphasis, "to be your chaperone?"

"Okay," Olivia shrugged. "What's a chaperone?"

"I'll explain later. So, you got any picture books in this place?"

"Sure."

 _Juveniles._ The two ignored me again, chattering mindlessly and walking away. That left just me and Xelloss.

"They certainly are two peas in a pod," the priest scratched his nose, looking pleased with himself. "Well, in any case, it appears that the matter has been settled for now. It's about time for me to take my leave. The rest is in your capable hands, Miss."

I didn't _feel_ very capable. I felt like a sham. My entire party had gone completely off the rails. But I would have to worry about _those_ knuckleheads later. I had _one_ more thing to ask Knucklehead Numero Uno.

"What, you're not gonna beg me to come along on the mission, too?" I ribbed Xelloss sarcastically. "Everyone _else_ already did."

"Oh, goodness, no!" the Mazoku shook his head in reply. "I really can't get directly involved right now."

"Oh yeah?" I asked. "And why not?"

…I'm pretty sure you already know what he had to say in response to _that_ question.

* * *

"Okay, it's around here _some_ where," Olivia indicated a broad section of shelving along the eastern-facing wall.

 _Finally,_ we were getting someplace. Well, sort of. We'd gone from finding a needle in a haystack to...finding a needle in a _slightly_ more manageable haystack.

"The 'manuscript' I borrowed from the vault at the guild was actually just a single page of a much larger text," Olivia explained, spreading out her hands for emphasis. "And I _know_ it goes with one of the books in this collection. I was trying to figure out where it fit in, but then I got hungry and forgot," she admitted.

Macrius, who had finally rejoined us, was marveling at the display. He ran his finger along the shelf, swooning a little more with each title he read. "Fergus's _A History of Letidius_ , First Edition...The _Encyclopedia Chimerica_...Ashwound's _Chronicle of the Demon War_...a _nd_ the _entire_ collected works of Torin the Gold?! Including the three lost volumes—! This is impossible! Am I...dreaming?"

"I will gladly pinch you," huffed Ellerin, who had to be separated from Mac by at least six feet at all times. Olivia glared at the Elf, who miraculously shut up. (Apparently, the kid was useful for _some_ thing. All it took to get Mac and Ellie to stop quarreling was Olivia shouting " _HEY! If you can't play nice, then you can't play at my house!_ ")

"Okay, well, let's divide and conquer," I said, desperate to get this mission back on track. "Alden, you take the left side of the shelf, and I'll take the right. Olivia, you can sort through those papers on the north tables, and Mac, you've got the tables on the South side. And Ellie," I sighed, looking up at her tall form next to me, "Just try not to cause any trouble."

Everyone scattered. The Dark Elf harrumphed but didn't raise any objections. She simply picked up a book and pretended to be interested in it, then snuck intermittent glances at me as I began pulling books off the shelves and flipping through them, looking for loose or missing pages.

While I checked out the plethora of books, I absently thought to myself that if Mom ever set foot in this library, she'd probably never want to leave. She's kind of a nerd when it comes to the arcane.

Speaking of nerds, Macrius was only a few yards away, sifting through piles of papers. I decided now was as good a time as any to pick his brain. He actually seemed like he knew what he was doing in battle, which is pretty rare for an academic sorcerer.

"So what was up with that spell you cast in the garden?" I asked him point blank. "I've never even heard of it before, but it really packed a punch against those gargoyles."

"Ah, that," Mac grunted distractedly, glancing from an old piece of parchment in his left hand to an even older one in his right. "It's a simple Holy spell."

"Don't say it like it's no big deal!" I reacted in shock. "Most sorcerers would pay a pretty hefty sum to learn Holy Magic," I stated. (I mean, I'm a filthy casual when it comes to magic, but even _I_ was interested.)

Mac reached for another scroll. "Yeah, you're not kidding, kid," he replied. "I certainly did. I'm _still_ in debt from all my years studying Holy Magic at the Academy of Solaria."

"So is _that_ where you learned that spell?" I inquired. "In Solaria?"

"Believe it or not, _no._ For all the time I spent there, the Academy only taught me magical theory. I gained enough of a base knowledge to translate the ancient instructional texts and start practicing Holy Magic on my own time," he explained, licking his thumb and paging through a leather-bound notebook. "But it's not like I can just perform Holy spells by replicating the movements and Chaos Words in the original texts. It requires a deeper knowledge than that."

"Really?" I raised my eyebrows. (I might not be a renowned sorceress, but magical theory is actually pretty interesting to me.)

"Yes. Because of the shift in the power between Gods and Mazoku since the Demon War, the old texts aren't always entirely accurate in describing the transferral of energy to the caster. So I've had to do a great deal of additional research to supplement that."

"Huh. Sounds like a lot of work," I remarked.

"Well, now you're beginning to understand what I do. Yes, it is, as you say, _a lot of work,"_ Mac repeated. "Recovering a single Holy spell could take years."

" _Years?_ Seriously?"

"Take that spell I performed, the Ragradia Rune. It didn't work when I performed it as originally written. The original incantation was ' _Thou who gleams upon the frozen seas, Dragon of the North, King of the labyrinth of ice, Bless me with your wisdom and might,'_ etcetera. But the Chaos Words needed to be changed because the God it invokes, Ragradia the Water Dragon King, lost its original form in the battle against the Dark Lord. He departed this world in the frozen labyrinths of the Kataart Mountains. And he is constantly reborn, dwelling in the souls of divinely ordained humans. Hence the new incantation: ' _Dragon of the North, lost in the labyrinth of ice; sleeping in the souls of the divine.'_ And so forth."

"Huh. So how'd you figure all that out?" I asked.

"Years of reading up on the topic. A background in magical vernacular. And a little guesswork," Mac shrugged. "Some say sorcery is an art, not a science. I say it's both. To tell you the truth, there's still something missing from the incantation. A piece of Ragradia I haven't been able to pinpoint. So the spell doesn't operate at its full power, nor do other spells connected to the Water Dragon King. But hey, at least I've got it to a point where it works. And if it comes into contact with Black Magic—well, you saw the result for yourself."

"Yeah, that kind of threw me off," I furrowed my brow. "Aren't Dark and Holy Magic supposed to cancel each other out? Just like opposite elemental spells do? That's what my mom told me, anyway."

"Ah. Well, technically, she isn't wrong—theoretically, that's how it's _supposed_ to work. Any textbook in this part of the world would tell you that a Black Magic spell and a Holy Magic spell in equal proportions should both disappear when they come into contact with one another."

"So what gives?" I asked. "That is _clearly_ not what happened."

"There are a few theories floating around. Some scholars argue that there was a major shift in the flow of magical energy to this world when the Mazoku Barrier was knocked down. Others pinpoint it to a few years ago—around the same time all the rumors about the Eternal Queen losing her powers started up, incidentally. And some are even saying that there's another Demon War raging in the lands beyond the former boundary. All immensely difficult theories to prove, you understand."

"So, in other words, no one has any idea what changed."

"Right. But one thing is for certain—the reaction between Holy and Black Magic has become extremely volatile. I sort of discovered it by a fluke, but it comes in handy in situations like the one we had earlier," the corners of Mac's mouth twitched up slightly.

"Yup. That was a pretty pretty cool trick, old man," I admitted.

"I'm not _that_ old!" protested Mac, exchanging the journal for a jeweled scroll case, "I'm thirty! But I'll graciously accept your compliment."

"So why haven't you published any of your findings? Seems like this stuff could really turn sorcery on its ear, but I've never heard of any of it," I said, sneezing as I pulled out the dustiest old tome yet.

"No, you wouldn't have," Mac sneered bitterly. "Rivera makes _sure_ of that." He threw the scroll case back down on the table and snatched up a book, looking thoroughly irritated. I debated on whether to press him any more on the subject of Rivera, but in the end I couldn't help myself. I'm a naturally curious gal, I guess.

"If you hate that Rivera dude's guts so much, why'd you ever apply to become his assistant?" I blurted out.

The sorcerer's hands trembled. "You know what they say, kid. Keep your friends close and your enemies closer," he iterated darkly.

"Fair enough," I replied, a little bit unnerved. Time to change the subject. "Okay, _one_ more question. Where'd you get the original version of that holy spell? I'm pretty sure info like that doesn't grow on trees."

"Ah, that. Well, to tell you the truth, it was the gift of an anonymous contributor," Mac said. "Someone slipped it into my pile of busywork one day, about three years ago—along with a note that said _from your secret friend._ No idea who it could be, though," he sighed heavily. "Most of the sorcerers at the guild ignore me if they don't openly mock me to gain Rivera's favor," he continued on morosely.

 _Yeowch. Sounds like our boy here has it pretty rough at work,_ I thought. I almost felt bad for drawing all over his face and calling him an old geezer. _Almost_.

"Wow. That sucks," I sympathized. Not that I could totally relate to being ostracized by my peers and signaled out or anything! Did I mention I'm super popular at school? ... _Stop looking at me like that!_

"So...really? No clue at all who it is?" I asked.

"None whatsoever," Macrius looked down at the papers he still hadn't touched yet. "Come to think of it, it's happened a few more times since then. Just last week, there was a new set of scrolls," he scratched his chin. "They're covered in ink now, though," he narrowed his eyes at the memory of this afternoon.

 _Ahaha...my bad._

"Still, though...the only reason I keep going back to that miserable library is because I'm hoping to find whoever is helping me and speak with them directly someday. I suppose that's a bit childish of me."

"Not really," I shrugged. I myself must admit that when school seems like a total drag, I keep telling myself that at _least_ I might someday strike up that conversation with the fishmonger's son. _Sigh_. _I wonder what he's doing right now._

"I mean, who knows? Maybe you've already met them," I encouraged the spiky-haired sorcerer.

A few feet away, Ellie dropped the book she was pretending to read. She turned away in embarrassment. I only saw her face for a split second, but I could've _sworn_ she was blushing.


	4. Four

**4: The Queen & I**

* * *

The passing minutes turned into hours as we searched the library. I was hungry, tired, and probably about to maul someone when finally, _finally,_ the blasted thing turned up. I was kind of expecting it to appear in a shower of fireworks accompanied by a fanfare of trumpets, given what a big stink everyone was making over this manuscript. But in actuality, it was a pretty mundane exchange. Well, it was at _first,_ anyway. I found a loose piece of paper, and tried to see if it matched up with a book I'd seen earlier. (Well, I say 'book,' but it was really more like a tattered leather-bound notebook full of what looked like some sort of code. Mac remarked from over my shoulder that it looked like it fit.)

"Uh-oh," Olivia remarked from the other side of the room. "Be careful!" she yelped.

"Be careful of _what?_ " I asked, irritated, but when I looked up from the book, Olivia was gone. Macrius was gone. The book was gone. The whole _library_ was gone. An intense chill rippled through the air, and I realized that all traces of the hot, dusty old mansion had vanished. The sun glinted overhead as I looked down to find, much to my distress, that I was treading on snowy ground.

A cavernous mountain lay behind me, and a great gaping chasm stretched out in front of me. But it wasn't the view that took my breath away. It was the sudden explosion that rattled the mountain. Not bothering to question why this was happening to me, I dove for cover behind a boulder. And when the dust cleared…

"Sir, you're being much too reckless!" a voice I didn't recognize rose up among the din of what was apparently an ongoing battle.

"Stay on your guard, Milgazia. Another wave is approaching from the East," a second unfamiliar voice barked orders in reply.

I peered over the rock, and was dumbstruck at what I saw. If the sight of a majestic Golden Dragon wasn't enough to turn heads, the sight of the man _next_ to the dragon sure was. There, draped in blood-red robes bound up with silver threads was…

 _Lei….Lei Magnus?!_ I stifled a gasp.

"Sir! They've already arrived!" The dragon took a mighty step backwards, his tail nearly swiping my head. I bit the inside of my mouth to keep from screaming as a legion of lesser demons took to flight on the opposite side of the chasm. There had to be at least a thousand of them, hanging in the air like dark, ominous clouds. And something told me they _weren't_ gathered for a family reunion…

"Attack! _Now_!" commanded Magnus, and the dragon, hesitating slightly, uttered something in a language I didn't understand. A great white shockwave hurtled towards the demons, sending some of their numbers plummeting to the earth far below. But they just kept coming!

Magnus was readying a spell of his own. The first spell he cast—it sounded like an amplification spell, though I couldn't be sure. And then…

" _Thou who art darker than night…"_

Whoah. An amplified Dragon Slave? _Not_ something you'd see every day. Unless you were Lei Magnus, probably.

But after hearing those familiar Chaos Words, what came next caught me off guard:

" _Dragon Slayer!"_ Magnus cried out _._ The Power Words echoed across the canyon as the incredible spell ripped through about two hundred airborne demons.

That's right...that's what the spell used to be called, back before the name got corrupted from centuries of use. I had a sinking suspicion that I wasn't _just_ a long way from home, I was a long _time_ from home, too. Too shocked and terrified to move, I watched as more demons rose to the sky by the dozen to take the place of the ones who had fallen.

"It's not going to be enough," the young-sounding dragon hung its head.

"The Dragon reinforcements should be arriving at any moment—" Magnus gritted his teeth. "Just...hold the enemy off for as long as you can!"

"But your human companions...can you really save them this way?" Milgazia turned to the sage, tail quivering.

"I've no other choice," Magnus replied, with a glazed-over look in his eyes. His body shook with adrenaline as he powered up the set of talismans he was carrying once again for amplification. The spell he chanted this time was different.

" _Thou who art more brilliant than dawn,_

 _Thou who dwells in crimson flames,_

 _Scattered to the four corners of the Earth;_

 _Heed my call, and destroy those who would bring about destruction._

 _Become my ally and deliver your swift vengeance._

 _The time of salvation is at hand!"_

" _Holy Crusader!"_

I couldn't believe my eyes or ears. Another spell, equal to the Dragon Slave in both size and firepower, went careening between the mountains. It smashed through the demon army's left flank spectacularly, buying the sorcerer and dragon more time.

Wave after wave of lesser demons came swooping in as the sorcerer and dragon fought on, holding their ground. And then, finally, with a great collective roar, an entire flock of Golden Dragons rose to meet the demons in combat.

"The reinforcements! They've arrived at last!" The young dragon's eyes sparkled with hope.

"By the providence of the Gods…" Magnus stopped casting and wiped sweat off his brow as the airborne dragons advanced, poised to gain the upper hand.

"I see," sighed a third voice. "Well, this is inconvenient."

Magnus jerked around to face the speaker. The familiar form of Xelloss the priest materialized out of the ether. Maybe it was just the mountain air, but something sent a chill down my spine. Milgazia averted his eyes awkwardly.

"Xelloss," Magnus gripped the priest by the shoulders. "Did you find any trace of them?" the sorcerer asked desperately.

"Yes. They're being held captive by a group of King Letidius's spies, just over the next mountain," Xelloss said calmly, in the same way you might report what groceries you bought at the store the other day. "They are unharmed," he added as an afterthought, "for the time being."

"And my granddaughter?" Magnus's voice quivered.

Xelloss shook his head slowly. "She is not with them."

Magnus let go of the priest, a look of both desolation and hope crossing his rigid features. "Then there's no time to waste. We need to keep moving."

"I don't see how we can," the dragon spoke in a low voice, still avoiding eye contact with the others. "Not while the battle rages on ahead of us. Even if you flew on my back, I could not guarantee your safety," he explained, a hint of apology in his voice.

" _No,"_ Magnus growled. "We've come too far to stop now. We must advance, before it's too late," he argued.

"But sir—!" the Golden Dragon protested.

Xelloss made a _tsk-tsk_ sound, a smile crossing his features. "It _is_ problematic, isn't it, Mr. Milgazia. Perhaps I could be of assistance."

The young dragon roared in protest, sending me reeling backwards. "I require no assistance from _you,_ demon priest!" he growled. "The Golden Dragon race would sooner _die_ than ally with the likes of you!"

Xelloss smiled ironically. "Have it your way, then," he simpered and vanished.

Magnus threw a glance in the dragon's direction, but Milgazia was looking elsewhere, transfixed on a point in the distance. A thick bloodlust hung in the air. And then…

" _No...NO!"_

Milgazia cried out in anguish as Golden Dragons and Lesser Demons alike all began dropping out of the sky, dying like insects by the hundreds at the hands of the smiling priest. Xelloss's body warped itself into hundreds of black wedge shapes in the air to attack his prey. His magic was overwhelming, far more powerful than Magnus's. My stomach turned at the sight of the massacre, and I had to look away. But Magnus stood transfixed.

"Xelloss...such power," the sage marveled as he looked upon the battle in awe.

"We cannot stand by and watch this slaughter," the dragon urged. "I must go and join the others—!"

Magnus held up an arm to stop the dragon's flight. "And perish along with them? I will not allow it."

"But—"

"We are as insects before Xelloss. A death by his hands would be pointless. Go back to your village, Milgazia. Tend to the survivors. You are needed there, not here," the sage said calmly. The dragon looked at him for a long moment, then bowed his head in understanding.

"Will...we meet each other again, sir?" the dragon asked remorsefully.

"I cannot say. Godspeed, my good friend," Magnus uttered.

"May the blessings of Ceiphied go with you," the dragon replied sadly, and turned back to leave.

Xelloss reappeared beside the sorcerer, extending a hand. "Well, that takes care of that," he indicated the empty skies. "Shall we get going?" he asked Magnus.

The sorcerer nodded, a somber expression on his face. And as the pair departed, I felt myself lurching forward, and the world around me blurred into darkness.

* * *

When I stopped moving , I found myself somewhere cold and damp. The air reeked of smoldering flames and death. And the only light to see by was a single torch on the wall. Then—

" _Lighting!"_ It was the voice of Lei Magnus, sounding considerably weaker than the last time I'd heard him. As the ball of light gathered in his hand, I could make out his facial features. He was exhausted and pale, with a cold, unchanging expression on his face. But in his eyes, I could sense an intense glint of danger. Something almost feral.

Beside him was the form of the priest Xelloss, looking as calm as ever. He scanned the room as the light penetrated the thick darkness, seeing that the floor was littered with corpses.

"Okay, I can't take it anymore," I looked directly at him, my knees clacking together. "What the hell is going on?" I demanded. But neither the priest nor the sage heard me. It was as though I wasn't even there.

The dark glint in Magnus's eyes intensified as he knelt down, shaking, to identify the bodies. "Orth...Selene… Rudinald...and Yvonne, too," he mouthed, his voice breaking. "All of them...dead."

"It would seem their captors fled the scene after the deed was done," Xelloss added. "Perhaps King Letidius called them back."

"So in the end…" Magnus breathed, "It really was pointless. After all our battles...all our triumphs against insurmountable odds...their lives were ended at the hands of mere humans," Magnus lamented.

"So it would seem," Xelloss replied somberly.

Magnus clenched his fists so hard that his nails bit into his skin. "Letidius will pay. I will wage war on his entire kingdom if I have to—I'll—"

Something cut Magnus short. A child's voice called out weakly to him in the darkness.

"...Grandpa?"

Magnus snapped to attention, some of the light returning to his eyes. From further down the dark dungeon corridor, I could make out a small cloaked figure, limping as though it had been injured.

"Olivia!" Magnus called out in desperation, rushing to the source of the voice.

" _Olivia_?!" I repeated, dumbstruck. It couldn't be...could it?

But it was. The very same little girl I'd encountered selling treasure in the foothills, the same kid I'd met again at the Zerramond mansion. She crept out of the shadows, the God's Eyes Talismans dangling from her loose canvas cloak. She collapsed into Lei Magnus's arms. I could see that she was bleeding heavily from her side.

The mighty sorcerer's lips quivered as he took in the sight of the injured child. "Who did this to you?!" He demanded, and immediately began casting the strongest healing spell, _Resurrection_.

"I'm sorry, Grandpa," Olivia struggled to speak as her head slumped onto Magnus's shoulder. Her tears stained his robes. "I...I came here by myself, I…" her breaths became more labored, but she forced herself to continue. "I tried to stop the bad guys who were hurting your friends. I used the spells you taught me, but—"

"Save your strength, my child," Magnus whispered. Olivia twisted her head to the side, coughing up thick gobs of blood.

Magnus turned to Xelloss in a panic. "Resurrection isn't working," he said, fear rising in his voice.

"There isn't enough living matter in this area to convert to energy to reverse the damages from her injuries," Xelloss explained. "You'd need to get her to a healer in town."

"There isn't enough time!" Magnus urged. "Xelloss. You know what you must do," he pleaded with the priest, who knelt beside him.

"I'm afraid that won't be possible," Xelloss responded sedately. "Without direct orders from my superior—" he began.

" _Silence_!" Magnus interrupted, grasping Xelloss by the collar violently. His eyes burned with hatred again as he spoke. "Look into my eyes, Priest of the Greater Beast, and tell me—would you refuse to follow an order from your master's master, the Dark Lord, Ruby-Eyed Shabranigdu? I, who slept within the souls of mortals for centuries—I, who awakened to my power in hatred and sorrow? Would you deny me? Doing so would assure your destruction," Magnus spat, throwing Xelloss to the ground.

Xellos bowed his head reverently. "Ah. So it's already happened, then. Forgive me my ignorance, my lord," he replied. "As you will it, it shall be done."

"Pledge yourself to the girl. Use the God's Eyes as the Stone. In exchange...the Demon's Blood Talismans shall be yours. I no longer require their use," Magnus commanded.

"Understood," Xelloss nodded.

"Olivia," Magnus turned to the girl, "You must pledge yourself to Xelloss. Quickly! Put your hand on the talismans and—"

"But…" the child protested meekly. Sensing her grandfather's determination intensify, however, she stopped and obeyed. "I...I pledge myself...to Xelloss…"

Her turn finished, Xelloss did the same. "I pledge myself to Olivia Zerramond."

 _The pledge of immortality_...an unholy pact between a human and a Mazoku. But one that would ensure that Olivia lived...as long as Xelloss and the Pledge Stone stayed intact.

Her blood dried. Her crying ceased. Time seemed to stop in that dark dungeon as Olivia Zerramond, granddaughter of Lei Magnus, lapsed into a dreamless sleep. After what seemed like an eternity, the sage rose and handed the sleeping child to Xelloss, who regarded her awkwardly.

"Ironic, isn't it?" Magnus laughed darkly. "I fought to surpass the power of the Gods; the power of the Mazoku, by my own hands. And now...I become the very thing I sought to destroy."

Magnus turned to leave, his robes lashing out behind him. "Protect the girl until she is fully recovered. Tell her that her grandfather has died...that the spies returned and killed him."

And then, he was gone. The sight of the bewildered Mazoku, the little girl, and the lifeless dungeon melted away around me, but the look of hatred in Lei Magnus's eyes continued to haunt me.

* * *

I awoke with a jolt. The room around me swam slowly into focus.

 _If this is another flashback, I swear to God…_

"Miss Luna?"

But the phantoms of the past—or _whatever_ they were—had vanished. I bolted upright in bed, and found myself in an unfamiliar room with a familiar face in front of me. The shrine maiden Blanche hovered just inches away from my sweaty brow.

"Miss Luna!" the lady-in-waiting repeated, gripping my hands enthusiastically. _Wait, Auntie's here too_?

"Where is she—?" I gulped, whipping my aching head around to get a better look at the room. It was simply but elegantly furnished, and smelled of clean linens. Everything was embroidered with red roses and tulips, which Meemaw would've probably been crazy about. But there was no one else around…

 _Oh crap! I forgot she thinks I'm…!_

"Uh, I mean, yep. I'm Luna. That's my name, don't wear it out! Ha ha ha..." I laughed nervously. _Ugh, that was so lame._ But as expected, Blanche still bought it hook, line, and sinker. I thanked my lucky stars that my esteemed employer, cute and nice though she was, had the deductive reasoning skills of a goblin.

As I became slightly more lucid, a million questions formed in my mind. First of all, I pinched my cheeks to see if I was really awake. _Ow!_ _Yup, definitely awake._ Next question...

"Um...where exactly am I?" I rubbed my aching face and looked up at the young priestess.

"A guest room in the Royal Palace," Blanche answered. "I'm sorry to surprise you like this, but I do hope you find it comfortable. I've just sent Lord Rasche to fetch us some tea."

 _Wow. I wouldn't have guessed it from the simple decor, but this is a classy establishment, huh?_ I marveled. But there was no time to be impressed! My list of questions had gotten longer again, because I'd noticed that someone had changed me into a frilly pink nightgown (which was totally not my color) and, more worrisome still, all my equipment was nowhere to be seen.

"How long have I been here? What _happened_ to me? Ugh—where's the sword!?" I panicked. Everything just kind of exploded out of my mouth at once.

Blanche's mouth turned down at the corners. "Please don't worry about your sword, Miss Luna. I checked it into the guard station when we arrived here yesterday. It's safe, I assure you. I'm more worried about _you,"_ her voice wavered. "You...you were cursed," she explained apologetically. "It must have been the Magnus Manuscript."

Aha. Blanche _did_ mention a curse associated with the manuscript, way back when. I had planned to research it more, but things kind of got out of hand with my training, and then there was all that funny business at the Sorcerer's Guild...

"Oh...right. When I put the page back in the book, everything just kind of…well, there's no way to explain it without sounding totally crazy," I sighed, looking down at my hands.

"I can't imagine. It seemed as though you were trapped in a terrible nightmare," the shrine maiden placed a hand on my head, looking miserable. "Your companions brought you to me, but I was unable to heal you. It's all my fault for getting you involved. I'm...so very sorry, Miss Luna."

"Nah, it's all right," I shrugged. "I learned a lot from this whole experience," I admitted. "But...what about everyone else? Are..are my friends okay?" It felt weird to call an oddball group like Macrius, Ellerin, and Olivia _friends_ , but I wasn't really sure how else to phrase that question. And I _was_ worried about them—plus, B.D. and my brother were with them, too.

"Well, I…" Blanche began, hesitating a bit.

" _I_ sent them away," a man's voice in the doorway startled me. "They were becoming a nuisance." Judging from the tea tray in his hands and his off-white scholar's robes, I guessed that this young man was Rasche the Ivory. I had to give Blanche some credit here—he was actually kind of a looker. Like, not _nearly_ on the same hotness level as the fishmonger's son, but his flowing locks and chiseled jaw were nice if you were into that sort of thing. (Plus, he didn't stink like old tuna.)

"O-oh...yes," Blanche fidgeted and blushed as Rasche set the tray down and sat beside her. "That poor little girl, Olivia—she just wouldn't stop crying. And the elf was watching you so intently…she didn't want to leave your side. I must say, I was certainly surprised to see that one of your friends was a Brass Demon. He gave the guards quite a fright," she added.

"Yeah, it's a kind of a long story," I buried my face in my hands as Blanche took a long sip of tea. "Sorry about that. So...what happens now? Is the Queen going to be all right? Did you use the manuscript to perform the ritual?" I picked my head up and looked between the silver-haired maiden and the scholar hopefully.

"Not yet," Blanche looked down.

"Lady Blanche refused to help us perform it until she knew _you_ were all right," Rasche added, placing a hand on the young woman's shoulder. "She's so soft-hearted…"

"Seriously?!" I was a bit taken aback. Putting my safety over the Queen's recovery...Blanche really was a nice person. Dumb, maybe, but nice. "Thanks, Blanche. I mean it."

"Erm, well...it's nothing, really," Blanche stammered. I looked past her flustered face at Rasche, trying to get a read on the guy that she was so crazy about. Then I did a double take. I rubbed my eyes—I couldn't believe what I was seeing.

Pinned to Rasche's clothes were... _The God's Eyes Talismans?! Then he really...uh-oh. Shit, what do I do? What do I_ say _?_

I tried to play it cool, but my stomach felt like it was on fire from the sudden anxiety that came with the realization. If Olivia and the others had seen Rasche, wouldn't they have tried to confront him about the talismans? Was he lying to me about them going home? Just _what_ the hell was going on here?

"Well, the young knight appears to be in better health now. Come, Lady Blanche. Her Majesty cannot wait any longer," Rasche urged.

"W-wait! I need to speak to Blanche first. _Alone_ ," I glared daggers at Rasche.

"Whatever for?" the scholar asked icily.

"It's...it's girl talk, okay? No boys allowed," I bluffed, quietly praying to every god I could think of that I'd get a chance to warn her.

Rasche stood up and gave us a once-over. "Very well. You have two minutes. Lady Blanche, I will await you outside," he said impatiently, departing for the time being.

As soon as I could be sure Rasche was out of earshot, I drew in a sharp breath, ready to spill my guts to the wide-eyed priestess who sat beside me.

"Err, Miss Luna? I'm not sure I understand what you're—"

"I know, just shut up and listen for a second, okay?!" I hissed. "It's super important. That guy—Rasche—I know you're really into him, but you can't trust him—he's a crook! I don't know why, but he stole those jewels from Olivia, and I can't explain it right now, but they're really, really, _really_ important to her, so please, just—"

Blanche gingerly placed her fingertips over my mouth to silence me, her eyes full of tears and understanding. "Miss Luna...I'm so desperately sorry..."

She pulled me into an embrace, sobbing deeply. I really had no idea what was going on in her head, but it couldn't have been good. Awkwardly, I returned the hug.

"It's too late for me," she managed to squeak out between tears.

"Uhh—hey now, come on, it's never too late! You can ditch him and find a better guy, right?" I pleaded. I hated to see her like this. But Blanche only shook her head.

"I'm so sorry...for everything. Farewell, Miss Luna," the shrine maiden wept. "I know you'll remember our promise. And thank you...for being someone I could trust." She struggled to smile at me one last time, squeezing my hands and kissing both my cheeks before she left.

"No, _wait!_ " I called after her, stumbling to get out of the tall four-poster bed. I had absolutely no idea what was going on, but something _really_ reeked about all this.

I couldn't seem to steady myself on my feet fast enough. As soon as I made it to the doorway, I found myself face-to face with Rasche, who looked thoroughly annoyed with me.

"Guards," he summoned a small enclave, "See to it that Miss 'Luna' does not leave her room. Make sure she's...well taken care of," he sneered as the guards began to close in on me.

 _Wha—?!_

"Why you dirty, low down, no good son of a—!"

"Tut tut—if you scream, you'll make poor Blanche cry again," he teased. "We wouldn't want that, would we? Come now, be a good little girl and die quietly."

 _Ooooh, I'll wipe that cocky grin off your face, you smug bastard!_

Well, that's what I thought, but there were now four heavily armed palace guards between Rasche and me, and he managed to get away fairly easily.

"You heard him," one of the guards brandished a spear. "Nighty-night, knight."

 _Just for that, I'm gonna skewer him first!_

I reached for my sword, which of course wasn't there. Which left magic as my only option. But if I cast a spell inside the royal palace...well, it was going to get me in a whole mess of trouble, but I didn't have time to think about it.

" _Fireball!"_ A blast of flames rendered the guards extra crispy. Surprisingly enough, the spell didn't come from me.

" _Alden?!"_ I stood dumbfounded when the dust settled to reveal that the fireball had come courtesy of my brother. He turned to Olivia, who was by his side.

"How'd I do?" He asked the diminutive sorceress with his usual cheeseball grin.

" _Yahoo_!" Olivia looked pretty pleased with herself. "You're a natural, Big Bro!" she cheered.

"Naw, not really," Alden rubbed the back of his head, "You're just a really good teacher."

"Um, _hello_?!" I waved both hands in the air. "Remember me? The person you're here to rescue?"

"Oh, heya sis," Alden snapped his head up and waved. "We got kind of held up after Rasche had us thrown in the dungeon for trying to steal back those talismans, so we—"

"Fill me in on the details later! Rasche is getting away!" I hollered as I sprang over the pile of charbroiled guards and took off running down the hallway in the direction Blanche and Rasche had seemed to be going.

"Actually, that's really pretty much the whole story," Alden shrugged as he and Olivia caught up to me.

"Yeah. I hate dungeons," Olivia added with a frown.

"I mean, I have to say though, out of all the dungeons I've ever _been_ in, that one was pretty top notch. I'd give it maybe four and a half stars out of five?" Alden teetered his hand from side to side in a 'so-so' gesture.

"The food was okay, I guess," Olivia scratched her nose.

" _Focus!"_ I rubbed my temples as we rounded a corner. "Where are the others?"

"After we busted out of there, Ellie wanted to go get your sword back from the guard station—"

"You sent _Ellie_ to get the—?! Are you crazy?" I nearly ran into the wall.

"Well, um, she _really_ wanted to be the one to get the sword. So then Mister Macrius went with her to make sure she wouldn't run away with it," Olivia explained.

My head was swimming. "You let _those two_ go together?! They're probably just standing around somewhere arguing!" I nearly screamed.

"See, that's why we sent in B.D. with them. To make sure the other two don't get in a fight," Alden said blankly. "Give us some credit here, okay? We're not _total_ idiots."

...Okay, I'd give them that. But they were still _partial_ idiots.

"They _do_ fight a lot, huh?" Olivia looked thoughtful. Such a keen observer of human and elf behavior, that one. "But I think deep down, maybe they really like each other," she guessed.

"Ugh, really?" my bro crinkled up his nose in disgust. "Then why don't they _act_ like it?"

"I dunno! Grown-ups are stupid," Olivia reasoned. I couldn't argue with that one.

We found ourselves at a four-way intersection in the long, white hallway. I was relatively sure that Blanche and Rasche would be headed to the throne room, where the Queen was said to be sleeping. Too bad there was no big sign on the wall that said _This Way to the Throne Room._ I could really use a break.

"Hey, can you track them?" I asked my brother. "Which way do you think they went?" He was a dope, sure, but he was a dope with heightened awareness due to being a thief. It was a step up from guessing.

"It's that way!" Alden pointed east.

He was correct. The throne room was down the hall to the East. You know what _else_ was down the hall to the east? A metric butt-ton of guards. _Figures._

"We need to get to the throne room! It's an emergency! The Queen might be in danger!" I called out to them, hoping they'd realize that we were the good guys and let us through.

No such luck.

"Sorry, kid," one of the guards answered as he lunged at me with a spear. "But Mr. Rasche is busy in there. And he promised a thousand gold to anyone who could bring him your heads!"

Well, at least he had the decency to explain _why_ he was trying to kill us. I evaded the first thrust, but it was just a feint. His second thrust caught me off guard, and I scrambled to avoid it, stumbling backwards.

" _Digger volt!"_ Olivia had managed to use her tiny size to her advantage, crawling under the guard's legs and electrifying his armor with a spell. My assailant fell. But then—

"Look out!" I panicked as another guard prepared to bring a halberd down on Olivia's head. A throwing knife tore through the air and sunk itself into the attacker's hand, causing him to cry out in agony as he dropped his weapon. Having finished his counterattack, Alden dove in to sweep the little girl out of harm's way. That's when I barbecued the second guard with a _flare arrow_ spell.

"Thanks, big bro!" Olivia cried in adulation. "You really saved me."

"Hey, what are chaperones for?" Alden smirked.

 _What am I, chopped orc meat?!_

No time to be salty—another pair of guards came barreling down the narrow passage. Before they could close the distance between us, I let loose with a _Wind Brid._ A cluster of invisible arrows formed out of the air around me and struck at the opponents. It's a hard spell to dodge because you can't see it, but one of the two guards got lucky and ducked at just the right moment. However, that left him vulnerable for another attack. Alden struck like lightning with his throwing knives again. I briefly wondered where he hid them all.

So many guards in the way, and so little time. Apparently I wasn't the _only_ one sick of fighting in the cramped hallway. "Get behind me, guys," Olivia warned. "I'm going to cast something big!"

I felt queasy. "It better not be another Dragon Slave!" I snapped at Olivia, remembering our escapade in the cave not-so-fondly.

"Nah, Grandpa told me the Dragon Slave is an outside spell," Olivia shrugged. "I've got a different one for inside."

Still uneasy, but anxious to get out of the hallway, I followed instructions as Olivia began the motions and Chaos Words.

" _O darkness,_

 _I call you forth from the abyss._

 _Destroy the enemy who stands before me!_

 _Blast Ash!"_

Another powerful Black Magic spell—well, it made more sense now, at least. I guess I wouldn't expect anything less from from the immortal granddaughter of Lei Magnus. Come to think of it, how old would that actually make Olivia…?

Before I could finish the mental math, though, a large black vortex stretched out under the remaining foot soldiers, reducing them to ash.

Unfortunately for us, the guards also had a sorcerer among their ranks. "I am the Royal Court Magician, Ulfred. Remember that name—it is the last one you will ever hear," he smiled wickedly.

Unlike his recently departed pals, our boy Ulfred appeared to be doing just dandy. He had avoided the _Blast Ash_ attack by levitating off the floor and casting a wind barrier. Being able to do both at once proved he was at least second-rate. Actually, he was probably _first_ rate if he was the Royal Court Magician.

... _ugh, more like a Royal Pain in the Ass,_ I grimaced as Ulfred mounted a counterattack.

" _Freeze Brid!"_ Ulfred heaved an enormous ball of ice at us. Olivia and Alden looked at each other and nodded. Then—

" _Fireball!"_ they called out in unison, sending their own spells into the fray. The wimpier of the two fireballs smashed into the _Freeze Brid_ , canceling it out. (Opposite elemental attacks can have that effect on each other, although there are some more intricacies of combining spells that somebody like Mom or Macrius could probably explain better than I could.) The beefier Fireball kept its forward momentum, on a collision course with Ulfred. But Ulfred saw it coming, and quickly put the kibosh on the _Fireball_ with the extinguishing spell, _Mos Varim._

Almost as suddenly as he'd put out the _Fireball,_ Ulrich had uttered another offensive spell. " _Van Rail!"_

Hundreds of tiny threads of ice spread from his fingertips to the ground where he touched it, coating the marbled floor beneath us with a slippery mass of ice.

"That's a safety violation!" I fumed as I tried to skitter out of the way. I slipped and fell to the ground, bringing my companions down with me.

"Owwie," Olivia rubbed her head where I'd knocked into her. Ulfred cackled in amusement and prepared an _icicle lance_ to finish us off.

Already sick of the ice capades, I chucked a spell of my own from down on the floor. " _Flare Lance!"_ I chanted, and once again the equal but opposing elemental spells fizzled out as they met in midair.

"Damn, this guy's good," Alden frowned deeply.

"Not as good as me!" Olivia protested. "He's going to use another ice spell. Cover me so I can hit him with Black Magic, okay?" she whispered to my brother and I as she levitated off the slippery floor.

I listened closely to anticipate Ulfred the Ugly's next move. The Chaos Words he'd begun to chant belonged to _Vice Freeze_ , the most powerful ice spell in shamanism. I had two options: cast its opposite spell, _Burst Flare,_ and let the two cancel each other out, or protect us with a wind barrier. I went for the path of least resistance and shielded us. (But don't misunderstand me here! It's not like I _couldn't_ have cast _Burst Flare_ if I _really_ wanted to! Stop looking at me like you don't believe me, it hurts my feelings.)

Olivia uttered a few Chaos Words of her own. It was some weird spell I've never heard of.

" _O Lord of Beasts who slumbers in the great forest;_

 _You who command the claws and teeth that rend flesh and cleave bone,_

 _Grant me the power to destroy the enemy that stands before me!_

 _Zelas Fang!"_

What appeared to be a multitude of red, pulsating needles gathered around Ulfred's head. In an instant, they zoomed inward, pierced his body and shocked him, bringing the Royal Sorcerer to the ground. I watched in morbid fascination as he writhed in pain. "What the _hell_ was that?" I asked, mildly creeped out.

"An original spell by the Great Sorcerer Zerramond!" Olivia happily replied. "I could've done a better one if I had my talismans, though," she scratched her chin in thought.

"You guys can talk shop later! He's getting back up!" Alden cried out in surprise.

 _Seriously?! What the hell is this creep made of?_ I gulped.

Ulfred began casting another spell through clenched jaws. But before I had time to react—

 _Smaaaash!_

The Holy Sword Calibren made its grand entrance along with Ellerin, who simply beaned our opponent with it. She breathed a sigh of relief and pushed a lock of hair away from her eyes as the Royal Court Magician Ulfred crumpled to the ground, hopefully for good this time.

"Hmph. Another disgusting human falls before my superior skills!" Ellerin grinned. " _That's_ how you win a battle," she put a hand on her hip with a proud flourish.

"Your brute strength _is_ really something, I'll admit," an astonished Macrius came out of the woodwork to congratulate the satisfied Dark Elf. B.D. plodded around the corner and bellowed a greeting.

"What took you guys so long?" Alden folded his arms.

"No time for chit-chat, human!" Ellie boomed, "The one called Rasche must pay for what he did to me! Come, let us advance upon the throne room."

"Can't argue with that logic," I agreed and hurried after Ellerin. "Come on, Blanche needs our help!"

And with that, the six of us pushed our way through the heavy gilded doors to the Eternal Queen's throne room.

* * *

Beyond the doors, it was dead quiet. We had entered a room so big, I couldn't believe we were still indoors. The air was unbelievably tense as we quietly crept up the long, violet carpet that passed through row after row of long stone columns, each one imbued with a carving of a legendary chimera.

At the end of the hall, a framed portrait of a lady glared down at us, a stern expression on her face. Her pale features and long, golden hair felt oddly familiar. Beneath the portrait, a magnificent throne stretched up the rest of the length of the wall. My breath caught in my throat when I saw her—the Eternal Queen of Zephilia, encased in a cocoon of pure crystal as she slept upon the throne. Kneeling before her great golden altar was Rasche the Ivory, a bloody dagger in his hands. He did not turn around to addressed us.

"So, you've made it this far...quite impressive indeed. It seems I've sorely underestimated you. But," he added, the laughter in his voice rising, "It was too little, too late. The manuscript, the talismans...they belong to me now."

Wow. I mean, _wow._ If ever there was a textbook villain, it was this jerkoff. I could already tell I was going to get real tired of his monologue, _real_ quick. So I shut him up.

"Cut the crap," I growled. "Where's Blanche?"

"See for yourself," the so-called scholar stepped aside, leaving the altar clearly visible. I dashed up to the pedestal to find the quivering form of the shrine maiden Blanche, lying prone. A number of fresh stab wounds covered her body. Her blood spilled over the sides of the great stone slab and pooled into the shallow grooves around the structure. Her face was pale from shock, but she was still breathing.

"Blanche—you have to hang in there. I'll cast _Recovery_ —we'll get you out of here—" Tears swamped my eyes as I called out to her in desperation.

But to my horror, Blanche only smiled deliriously. "Miss Luna...remember...our promise…" she whispered.

Our promise...she'd mentioned it earlier as she'd said goodbye, but I hadn't even had time to process it then. ' _No matter what happens to me, you will go on fighting. To carry on the promise I made to protect our beloved Queen.'_ That's what she'd said the night I'd met her. Had she known all along? That _this_ was going to happen?! I didn't understand, I didn't _want_ to understand. Why would she do this?

Rasche cupped the priestess's chin in his hands as she breathed her last. "Yes...her ladyship has made a _noble_ sacrifice for the greater good. Just like oh so many shrine maidens before her," he sneered. "It really does seem like a waste, doesn't it?"

"She believed in you," I spat, bristling with anger. "She _loved_ you. How could you do this to her?" Behind me, my companions mourned the loss of life. Macrius prayed. B.D. rested a hand on Ellerin's shoulder. And Alden held Olivia while she cried.

"It was her decision, in the end," Rasche shrugged. "She was prepared to do anything for your Queen. Up to and including sacrificing her own life."

I swallowed hard. "And...and the Queen...will she be…?"

"Oh, she'll wake up all right. Once I've gathered enough fresh blood, that is. But _that_ won't be a problem...I'll make you _all_ sacrifices!" Rasche laughed maniacally, inching towards us.

"Rasche. That's enough," a stern voice interrupted the proceedings. Ellerin's eyes lit up with recognition while Macrius's narrowed with hatred. Rivera the Azure, the Director of the Zephiel City Sorcerer's Guild, stepped out of the shadows.

"Guildmaster!" Ellerin cried. The esteemed Director was already chanting a spell.

" _Gaz Vu Row!"_

"Master!" Rasche whipped around to face the man who was targeting him. But he wasn't fast enough. A great swarm of shadows descended upon Rasche, closing in to devour him. His maniacal howls of pain were silenced almost as soon as they began. Rasche folded and fell like a lifeless rag doll.

"Oh, Guildmaster!" Ellerin eagerly ran to her boss's side, looking relieved. "I was so worried…" She still clutched Auntie's sword to her chest like a prize, which made me uneasy.

"Ellerin," the Guildmaster addressed his assistant, "I find myself disappointed in you. Your assignment was to prevent this very thing from happening. We will discuss the matter of your pay later."

"Yes sir," the Elf hung her head in shame.

Guildmaster Rivera's eyes trailed from the crestfallen Dark Elf to the bloody altar, and then to the five of us. "As for the rest of you," he frowned, "You've caused a great deal of damage to the Royal Palace. Repairs will be quite costly for you. You will likely be facing legal charges, as well," his frown deepened. "It's really quite a bothersome situation for me."

I felt the pit in my stomach deepen. _Mom's gonna kill me…_

"However," Rivera continued, "There is the matter of...collateral."

"Co...collateral?" I stammered.

"Yes. The Magnus Manuscript...The God's Eyes Talismans...and the Holy Sword, Calibren," Rivera ticked off his fingers as he counted up the magical artifacts in the room. "All quite valuable items you've gathered. I may be willing to help the Royal Parliament look the other way...in exchange for these three items. Do we have an understanding?" He regarded me sternly.

Oh. So _that's_ how it was. Rivera had cooked up this mission in order to get his greasy paws on the magical items he wanted. But because of that, Blanche had to…

"Rivera, you sick bastard," Macrius bellowed. "You don't even care about her at all, _do_ you?! You'd let the Queen wither away and die for your own benefit. You may have the Parliament fooled, but I see you for what you really are, you despicable, stuck-up pretender to the throne! You disgust me," he accused, shaking with rage. _Wow. He must've been holding that in for a long time._

"I'd watch what I said if I were you," Rivera regarded the librarian icily. "Your work has already been thoroughly discredited by the Guild council—"

"And whose fault is _that_?!" Macrius replied through clenched teeth.

"No other Sorcerer's Guild in the world would employ you," Rivera stated. "You're on thin ice, my old friend. Now, let the girl make her choice," the sorcerer narrowed his eyes at me.

"What are you gonna do, big sis?" Olivia looked up at me pleadingly. "My talismans…"

I clenched my fists. There was no way in Hell we were gonna do this Rivera's way. I didn't care how much I'd be punished for it.

"No deal," I told Rivera plain and simple.

Rivera's face broke into a laugh. "I don't think you realize the gravity of the situation. You'd owe money for the rest of your life if you refused. You may even be thrown in prison," he explained.

"Yeah?" I argued. "And what if you got the artifacts today, but you still weren't satisfied? You could continue to hold all this over my head. You could still threaten to expose me. You could keep blackmailing me forever if you bailed me out now," I folded my arms. "Sorry, but I'm not as easy to manipulate as Mac over here."

"Hey now!" Macrius protested weakly. _Sorry, buddy, I just call 'em like I see 'em._

Rivera's smile broadened. "You're a very smart little girl," he chuckled. "What a shame we couldn't see eye to eye. In that case…" he took a step closer to me, "How would you like to pay...with your life?"

"Guildmaster, no!" Ellerin's eyes went wide with horror. I hadn't noticed it, but Rivera had already started to rattle off a spell. _Damn, he's fast!_

 _Whoosh!_ In a flash of steel and strength, the Holy Sword came swinging down. In the blink of an eye, the hand that Rivera was using to gather magical energy had been severed. The guildmaster stifled a cry of horror and pain by biting into his own shoulder. He sunk to his knees to recite a healing spell.

Ellerin's hands shook violently as she wielded the sword. "I-I…" she stammered. "I won't allow this," she panted. "I, too, desire the Holy Sword. But no one should be willing to kill for it. Mister Rivera...I must insist that we abandon this plan."

His wound partially healed, Rivera stood up to face his assistant. " _You_ ," he hissed, "and after all I've done for you, Ellerin...you will pay dearly for this," he began reciting yet another spell, but was interrupted again—this time, by a _flare arrow_ to his good arm. In a panic, the Guildmaster turned to extinguish his robes.

The spell had come from Macrius. "No—you've already ruined my life," the librarian shouted defiantly. "But I will _not_ stand by and let you ruin someone else's!"

"Nice moves, dude!" Alden raised his eyebrows. "B.D., grab this Rivera jerk and let's go already. We can let the authorities deal with him. And by authorities, I mean Aunt Luna," he clarified.

B.D. nodded and stepped in to help restrain the fallen Rivera as Ellerin held the guildmaster at swordpoint. Olivia timidly approached the altar as well, searching it for her missing talismans.

"That won't be necessary," a voice echoed through the throne room. With a start, I looked around to see where it had come from. Before I could pinpoint the source, _some_ thing tore a hole right through Rivera's stomach. That's when I noticed Rasche the Ivory, sitting up behind the altar. Whatever spell he'd cast, it had been nasty enough to rip right through Rivera's vital organs.

"Rest in peace...my dear teacher," Rasche chuckled darkly as the rest of us looked on in shock.

B.D. instinctively grabbed Olivia and Ellerin under his arms and tried to put as much distance between himself and Rasche as he could. But as he fled, Rasche struck again. This time, the spell reduced the Brass Demon to dust.

"B.D.—!" Alden cried out in remorse. " _No!"_

" _Damn it_!" I cursed as Olivia and Ellerin were thrown to the ground. Panic and adrenaline coursed through my body. The bloodlust in the air was palpable. _Rasche should have died from that spell! What the hell was going on? Was he really…?_

"You...you're a…" Alden gasped out, terrified.

"Ah, yes. I believe it's time to properly introduce myself," Rasche sniggered derisively. "These humans and their petty titles—Ivory is really _not_ my color. I'd much rather be called by the name my esteemed master gave me: Rasche Grau."

"And just who _is_ your esteemed master?" Macrius asked suspiciously, helping Ellerin to her feet. I already had a bad feeling about this.

"I may decide to tell you. But first, let's play for a bit." Grau heaved another of his enigmatic attacks at us in reply. This time, I could make it out more clearly: a small disc of black energy. The five of us scattered like insects to dodge it...except Ellerin, who brought Auntie's sword down upon it. Calibren glimmered with a radiant aura which repelled the attack, sending it smashing into a marble column. The column fizzled and crumbled, bringing some of the ceiling down with it.

" _Look out!"_ Olivia levitated out of the way of the falling debris, carrying my brother along with her.

" _Ha ha ha—!_ Most amusing," Grau rippled with laughter. Frankly, I didn't see what was so funny about all this. "In deference to your entertaining display, I shall allow you to witness my great masterpiece before you die."

"Masterpiece? You mean that big painting on the wall?" Olivia raised an eyebrow. "It's not _that_ good."

"Hah! I aspire to a _much_ higher standard of beauty, little girl," Rasche stroked his chin. "Although you're not so far off the mark. With the blood of these two humans, I shall release the Eternal Queen from her cursed sleep," he explained, indicating Rivera. With a snap of his fingers, the deceased Guildmaster appeared on the pedestal beside Blanche. His blood mixed with hers, spilling out into the crevices below—forming a glowing red pentagram. The Queen's crystal made a sharp, piercing _pop_ , and all at once the stone around her began to shatter.

"What are you going to do to her?!" Ellerin roared, her knuckles whitening from gripping the sword tightly in her hands.

"The question, my dear, is what _did_ I do to her," Rasche smirked. "The Eternal Queen you're all so fond of no longer exists in this world. When the Queen began to mysteriously die; when her memories of the Water Dragon King began to fade, sweet, devoted Lady Blanche was simply beside herself. So she turned to my research for help. Fortunately for her, I knew a certain ritual. A ritual to prolong a human's life...by grafting a Mazoku to their body. Of course, dear Blanche wasn't privy to that last bit of information."

"So the Queen has become...a half-demon, then?" Macrius asked in horrified fascination.

"It's not really quite so simple. Part homunculus, part chimera, part Mazoku...I was sure that there couldn't _possibly_ be much of the Eternal Queen left. However...I must admit that I did underestimate her. In a last, valiant attempt to stop the Mazoku from merging with her mind, the Queen put herself into an enchanted sleep. But I've got a ritual for that, too. All it takes are a few magical items and about ten liters of fresh human blood," he shrugged. "The result is as you see here."

"But _why?_ " Macrius asked. "Why go to such lengths?"

"Oh, _lots_ of reasons. If she lives, she'll be a convenient puppet for me. If she dies...well, a political vacuum is _such_ an easy way to start a war. A war to awaken a new piece of my master's creator. Maybe you've heard of him? The Venerable Dark Lord, Shabranigdu?"

 _Ugh, I freakin' knew it._ "You guys never quit, do you?" I asked.

"Neither do _you_ , apparently. But alas, you humans lead such short lives. It seems your parents were well aware of that fact. They certainly didn't waste any time in procreating," Rasche addressed Alden and me with disgust. "But luckily, it seems the two of you possess none of their superior abilities. It'll make getting revenge on them _so_ much sweeter. Imagine the looks on their faces when they find out I've killed you."

"Not gonna happen, bucko!" I retorted, though quite frankly it was hard to sound convincing when I knew what I was up against. During the Demon War, Shabranigdu created five retainers for himself, each a supreme Mazoku Lord in and of themselves. And the five retainers, in turn, created a general and a priest to do their bidding.

The man in front of us, by process of elimination, had to be the Mazoku retainer Dynast Grausherra's priest. Why? Well, my parents had already taken care of Dynast's general Sherra a while back. (Actually, they'd kind of done a number on Dynast himself, too.) And out of all the retainers, Dynast was the _least_ creative at naming his servants. I mean, all you had to do was rearrange the syllables...it didn't _exactly_ require any mental gymnastics. Too bad defeating this talkative asshat was gonna be a lot harder than figuring out his identity was.

Olivia and Alden crept up to me as Rasche admired the sound of his own voice. "Psst! Big sis," Olivia hissed in my ear. "Me and Alden have a plan."

I raised my eyebrows expectantly. I mean, I wasn't exactly anticipating something that was gonna totally blow my mind coming from _those_ two buffoons, but hey, at least they _had_ a plan.

"Mac and Ellie are gonna go distract Rash...or, uh, Grow, or _whatever_ the heck his name is," Alden whispered in my other ear. "I'll sneak up to the altar and steal the talismans. And then Olivia's gonna use them to blow his fat head off."

"So what am _I_ supposed to do?" I frowned.

"Uh...try not to die?" Alden mouthed. "Olivia needs your magic as her backup plan."

 _Gee, thanks, I can't_ tell _you how many times I've dreamed of being a backup plan._

"What about _you_? You sure you're not gonna crap your pants if you get too close to a Mazoku?" I asked my bro out of the corner of my mouth.

"A Great Thief always faces his fears head on," Alden nodded resolutely. I had to admire his guts. "This one's for all the ladies," he smiled roguishly, "But mostly for you, Olivia."

"You're awesome, Big Bro!" Olivia swooned.

"Ugh! Get lost before I barf!" I shooed Alden away. He ducked behind a pillar and began his sneak attack.

Speaking of attacks, Macrius was gearing up for one of his own.

" _Ra Tilt!_ "

Wow. I knew Mac was no slouch in the magic department, but I had no idea he could pull off the strongest spiritual spell in the book. Not even my mom really knew that one. But it's a useful spell to have if you ever need to attack a single target that has an astral body.

In a flash of blue, Grau was brought to his knees. Guess he wasn't used to someone interrupting him while he was divulging all the sordid details of his Evil Plan. As I expected, the Ra Tilt wasn't enough to do him in. But at least it got his attention.

"Such insolence!" Grau cried in outrage as he clutched his sides. "And after I was kind enough to invite you to the Queen's ceremony—"

Grau heaved another of his own attacks at Mac. But this time, it tore across the floor, creating a shockwave that ripped up the tile as it set itself on a collision course with the sorcerer.

" _Ray Wing!"_ As if by reflex, Macrius lifted himself off the ground, encased in a shield. And while Mac evaded, Ellie attacked. The Dark Elf advanced on Grau with beastly ferocity, channeling her will into the sword. The aura Calibren radiated was like nothing I'd ever seen before—it was almost like I was looking at a storybook picture of the legendary Swordsman of Light.

The sword slashed through Grau's robes before he had time to teleport out of the way.

"Coward!" Ellie raged. "If you are confident in your power, then face us in fair combat, demon! Retreating to the Astral Plane is a trick of the weak."

Here's a pro tip for fighting a Mazoku: they _never_ back down from a challenge like that. They're a proud bunch—totally convinced that a fight with a mortal being should be child's play. But you know what they say: a dragon can still exhaust its strength chasing after a fly.

"Very well, then. I will honor your request—since it will be your last," Grau reappeared to stand face-to-face with Ellerin. In his hands, he held what appeared to be a long staff. He'd probably fashioned it out of part of his own body—Mazoku can do stuff like that when the situation calls for it.

He advanced on Ellie, twirling the staff around to the left but then quickly sweeping it downward to the right, aiming at his opponent's legs. Ellie saw it coming and jumped over the staff easily, landing gracefully on her feet. As quickly as he'd struck from below, Grau brought the staff up to hit her from above, but again Ellie read his move, bringing the sword up to block it. They seemed equally matched in speed.

While Ellie shook off her attacker's advances, Macrius landed and joined in the fight again. " _Elmekia Flame!"_ A pillar of light encased Grau, catching him off guard. Mac had probably chosen the spell because it was easy to aim, therefore reducing any chances of friendly fire. Although a well cast _Elmekia Flame_ has the power to to reduce a human opponent to a mindless husk, to a Mazoku it was only a momentary distraction. But that was all Ellie needed.

" _Hyahh!"_ Ellerin's battle cry filled the throne room as she struck out at Grau like a cobra. The blade of Aunt Luna's sword bit into Grau's shoulder. Ellie shed beads of sweat as she concentrated hard on the blade, so that its aura intensified. The parts of Grau's shoulder that Calibren was having prolonged contact with warped, bubbled, and melted. Grau recoiled and pulled back, the blade doing more damage as it was forced out of him.

 _Hey Brenda, how come you never did anything cool like that when_ I _used you?!_

To my horror, Grau smiled as he pulled away. "You'll pay for that," he cackled.

He struck one-handed with his staff from overhead, and Ellie moved the sword up to block it. But when she did—

" _Die!"_ Grau used his other hand to aim one of his magical attacks straight into Ellerin's abdomen. Time seemed to move in slow motion as her face fell with the realization. But at the same time—

" _Elmekia Lance!"_ Macrius aimed his spear of spirit magic at Grau's arm, and the force of the spell caused Grau's attack to glance Ellie's side rather than hit her full on in front, saving her life.

She was still wounded. Ellie stumbled back, defiantly clutching the sword.

"You need to retreat," Mac told her. "Let the young lady heal your wounds," he commanded. "I'll take him one-on-one."

"But—!" Ellie protested, struggling to remain standing. "You alone can not possibly—"

"I would be happy to argue with you later, Ellerin. But now is not the time. I insist. Go!" Macrius looked her in the eyes, and Ellie's demeanor softened a bit. With that, Mac sprang into action, gearing up for another _Ra Tilt._

Olivia helped the injured elf over to me, and I began to cast _Recovery_. Meanwhile, with Rasche's attention away from the altar, Alden had made it to the front of the room undetected. But just as he reached for the talismans—

"Earthquake!" Olivia shouted as the ground below us began to move. But the rumbling in the room wasn't coming from below. I snapped up my head to find that around the Queen, there was no longer a crystal cocoon. In its place was a swirling vortex of energy that seemed to be making the room unstable. The great stone pillars around us began to crumble and fall one by one. The chimeric forms that decorated the columns sprang to life and plunged themselves into the Queen's flesh.

"Yes! It's happening at last!" Grau howled with glee as the Queen's body took on a monstrous form. Her porcelain white gown was ripped to shreds as her skin rippled like waves, stretching to fit her new form: a huge, towering beast.

With the horns of a Brass Demon, the wings of a plasma dragon, the body of a blow demon, the legs of a Minotaur, and countless arms that appeared to be bundles of snakes, she was a frightening sight to behold. But more threatening still was the fact that that the ceiling had begun to collapse completely in the absence of the columns.

" _Run for it!"_ I heard my brother cry as the walls crumbled under the weight of the sagging ceiling. But it was too late to avoid the rain of falling debris. I closed my eyes and winced, fully expecting to be crushed to death.

You can imagine my surprise when I wasn't.

The room had gone utterly silent. I slowly opened my eyes and realized it was because the room had simply vanished. There was nothing, nothing as far as the eye could see. The five of us—Mac, Alden, Ellie, Olivia, and me—seemed to be simply floating in space. Before us loomed the monstrous form of the Eternal Queen.

"Is this the afterlife?!" Alden gulped.

"No," Mac whispered cautiously, observing the unmoving Queen for a few seconds before speaking again. "We're in subspace. A pocket dimension."

A woman's voice rang out in the darkness. _With the last of my strength...I have created this place of nothingness. To seal away the power of destruction that flows through my veins...but now, I know it will not be sufficient to hold me back. Brave warriors, heed my final request...please...please kill me…_

The voice faded, swallowed by the empty space all around us. "Was that…!?" I managed to squeak out. Mac nodded solemnly.

"The Eternal Queen…" the librarian bowed his head reverently.

"She wants us to _what_?!" Alden fanned himself nervously, looking more deeply troubled than I've ever seen him. "There's no way we could do something like that."

There was no time to debate over the moral quandary we were in. The Queen's body began to slowly advance toward us, her eyes glowing with unimaginable bloodlust. She had become a mindless, murderous Mazoku.

Her spindly snake arms lashed out at Olivia, who levitated out of the way just in time. Ellerin slowly sat up, clutching the sword in one hand and her side with the other.

"I will slay her...with this sword…" the Dark Elf breathed heavily, struggling to advance. Macrius held out an arm to stop her.

"You most certainly will not," he argued.

"Yeah, not until we finish healing you," I added. "We'll try magic first. Olivia, what have you got?" I looked down at the kid, figuring she'd have the best shot at doing some actual damage to this thing.

Olivia turned to Alden. "Big bro, did you get the Talismans?" she asked.

Alden's face fell. "Sorry, kiddo. When the ceiling fell, I must have dropped them. They're probably still in the other dimension," he knitted his brow.

"You _dropped_ them?!" I snapped, smacking my brother across the head. "You idiot! If those things break, Olivia will—"

The diminutive sorceress shot me a panicked look. She jumped up and clamped a hand over my mouth before I could finish the sentence—I guess she wasn't too keen on the others finding out about her Pledge Stone. Whoops.

"It's fine," Olivia said insistently. "I can't cast Blast Bomb without them. But I've still got the Dragon Slave _._ "

"Okay. I'll keep working on Ellie's wound. Mac, you cover us with a Wind Barrier," I responded.

"Understood," Mac nodded and began casting—and just in time, too. The Queen opened her gaping mouth to release a barrage of fireballs at us. I got back to work on casting _Recovery._ And Olivia took point, gearing up for the offense.

" _Thou who art darker than night…"_

As Olivia spoke the Chaos Words, the Queen continued edging closer to us. Alden ducked behind me. Ellie put on a brave face as I healed her wounds, but her hands were shaking.

" _Dragon Slave!"_ Olivia finished the spell. It plunged itself into the Queen's massive body, driving her backwards as she lashed out again and again with her tangle of arms. She was injured, but not dead.

"She's still moving?!" Alden gaped. The Queen reared back her head and let out a monstrous roar, charging us with a vengeance.

"The power of the Gods still exists within her body, although the power of the Mazoku has corrupted her mind," Ellie shook her head. "Her will is strong. Killing her will be no easy task."

A few more oversized fireballs came crashing down onto our shield. "I don't think the wind barrier can stand up to her physical attacks," Mac cautioned as she closed the distance between us.

"Okay," I swallowed hard. "Olivia, hit her with another Dragon Slave."

"It'll push her back again," Olivia replied. "But then what? I think we'll need to hit her harder if we want to finish her off."

"Right. Just keep casting—we'll think of something. What if..." I sorted through my thoughts out loud. My heart was pounding out of my chest, but I tried to keep it together. "What if we used a different spell?"

"I don't think we can go much bigger than a Dragon Slave," my brother furrowed his brow.

 _Yeah, I'm really missing mom right about now. Her grilled cheese sandwiches and her spells are both first rate. What I wouldn't give for one or the other..._ I had to shake off my homesickness and focus on the fight, though. _Hang in there, me!_

"Okay, but what if we combined it with something else? We've got three people here who can use magic. Mac, maybe you could drop the shield and try a _Ra Tilt,_ and then—"

 _Blam!_ I was interrupted by the sound of another Dragon Slave pushing the Queen away. It bought us more time, at the very least.

"Maybe," Mac replied. "It's worth a try."

The next time the Queen came around, Mac and Olivia were ready for her. They hit with a Dragon Slave and a Ra Tilt at the same time. Blue energy crackled around red, smashing into the Queen violently. It looked like it was working. A few dozen of the Queen's serpentine arms were blasted off, and she howled in pain once again. With a blood-curdling scream, she released more fireballs from her mouth. But this time, there was no wind barrier to stop them.

"Look out!" Ellerin cried, jumping up front to cut through the magical attack with the legendary sword. Calibren neatly cleaved away at all of them—all of them except for one.

Olivia levitated to try to dodge the oncoming attack. The kid was was fast, but the Queen's attack was faster. The small girl gritted her teeth as both her legs were engulfed in the fireball. To her credit, she kept calm and cast _Mos Varim_ to smother the flames.

"Olivia!" Alden gasped, running to catch her as she collapsed, her weakened legs unable to hold her up. I knew she'd probably be fine, given the nature of the Pledge, but...it was still hard to watch.

"I'll be okay," she began casting a healing spell on her legs. "I'll just need a minute…"

"We don't have a minute," Mac warned. "The Queen's about to make another pass at us." He snapped around to face me. "What's the best spell you've got?"

It's times like these when the backup spellcaster gets to shine. Well, that's what I'd _like_ to say in this situation, but my best spell was usually _Mega Brand._ And I had a feeling it wasn't quite up to scratch. But something nagged at the corners of my mind. A spell I'd seen before, only once. But yet somehow, it felt familiar to me. And the feeling I should use it wouldn't leave me alone.

"I...I think I've got something. A spell about as big as a Dragon Slave," I gulped. "Here goes nothing."

Mac geared up for another Ra Tilt. And as for me…

" _Thou who art more brilliant than dawn…"_

"What kind of spell is that?" Alden grimaced. "I've never heard of it."

Olivia's eyes went wide. "Grandpa's Holy spell…"

It was the spell Lei Magnus used in the past. I'd seen the motions and heard the Chaos Words. It was a gamble, but it sure as hell beat firing off a Mega Brand. Because maybe if Black Magic wasn't going to cut it, we could vanquish our foe with some Holy Magic.

" _Thou who dwells in crimson flames,_

 _Scattered to the four corners of the Earth;_

 _Heed my call, and destroy those who would bring about destruction._

 _Become my ally and deliver your swift vengeance._

 _The time of salvation is at hand!"_

" _Holy Crusader!"_

I lobbed the spell forward. It caused a small explosion, and while it didn't shake the Queen off of us, it seemed to at least be causing her a great deal of pain.

"A spell that calls upon the power of Flare Dragon," Ellerin uttered. "But…"

"It's incomplete," Mac lamented as his Ra Tilt engulfed the Queen at the same time. "Because of the shift in the Gods' power distribution since the Demon War...the Chaos Words would need to be changed to achieve the full affect."

"Changed how?" Alden asked.

"I'm not sure. There's no time to discuss it—" Mac threw out another wind barrier to protect our ragtag band as another slew of fireballs battered against us.

"Well," I said slowly, thinking back to Mac's lecture and the battle in the gargoyle garden, "If we can't get the full effect with Holy Magic, then...we can get a big reaction by mixing it with an opposing Black Magic spell. Right?" I looked up at the librarian, feeling a little more confident than before. "So a spell that draws from the opposite power source of Ceiphied…"

"...would be a spell that calls on the power of Shabranigdu. Right?" Olivia nodded, catching on. It looked like she'd successfully healed herself.

"Precisely," Mac chimed in. "I'll hold up the wind barrier. Whenever you two are ready…"

Olivia and I made eye contact and synced up our motions. Then…

" _Thou who art darker than night…"_

" _Thou who art more brilliant than dawn…"_

We chanted, aimed, and fired. The fearsome power of the Dragon Slave colliding with the once-mighty Holy Crusader was a spectacle to behold. The resulting combination caused a forceful detonation that rocked the entire pocket dimension—it was like throwing explosives on top of a fire. The nothingness around us began to crack and collapse as the Queen was totally engulfed in the resulting blast. I had to shield my eyes because of just how blinding it was.

When the rumbling ceased and the light faded, I finally opened my eyes. We were standing in the ruins of the Eternal Queen's throne room. The ceiling had fully collapsed, and I could see the blue sky overhead. The Queen's enormous portrait stared at me accusingly from its new location in a pile of wreckage, and the weight of what I'd just done hit me all at once.

"Is it over?!" Alden shook with fear, still covering his face with his hands. Olivia patted him sympathetically on the back as Mac hoisted him up out of the debris.

"The Eternal Queen...is no more," Ellie said with a finality that chilled me to the core.

"Damn it," I cursed, "What was the point of all that? We lost B.D...and Blanche...and in the end, Grau still got what he wanted. The kingdom's going to fall apart without the Queen, and it's all our fault," I folded my arms, feeling helpless and frustrated.

"Human!" Ellie boomed, startling me out of my reverie. "I am only going to say this to you once, so listen well. This catastrophe...was _not_ your fault," she said, although her harsh tone still made me feel slightly accused of something. "You did only what you thought was right. The blame rests with the evil ambitions of the Guildmaster, which I failed to detect. And...with the Mazoku, Rasche Grau, who preyed upon the weak-minded humans of this land."

"For once, I agree with you," Mac concurred with the elf.

"Oh, is that how you _really_ feel?" a voice pierced the air. I snapped around to find myself face-to-face with the rat bastard who'd started all this.

" _Grau._ Haven't you already done enough?" I spat, sick to death of his face. For the record, I take back all that stuff I said about him being handsome before.

"I won't consider this mission a success until I've killed you," the priest shrugged flippantly.

"Same here," I narrowed my eyes. "Let's go, punk."

Everyone assumed battle stances once more. Mac put up another wind barrier as Grau began to blast us with his signature black disc attack.

" _Elmekia Lance_!" I chanted, hoping to slow the Mazoku down. He teleported out of the way.

"Why you— _cheater!_ " Ellie raged.

"All bets are off now, my dear," Grau's voice answered as if out of thin air. "We're playing _my_ way."

In an instant, Grau had teleported into our barrier. His hands wrapped around my brother's neck.

"Olivia, catch!" My brother screamed frantically before the priest's hands moved in to silence him. Alden must have recovered the talismans from the rubble just moments earlier—they flew straight into Olivia's hands.

"Oh?" Rasche leapt backwards, my brother still struggling against his grasp. "Are you going to attack me with those, little one?" His eyes lit up, his face contorting in a demented grin. "Your friend here might get caught in the blast. Think carefully," he taunted.

To my surprise, Olivia pressed the four gemstones into my hands. "I'm going in to save Big Bro," she whispered to me. "As soon as I get him out of there—use these to amplify that spell," she whispered.

" _What?!_ " I panicked. "I don't even know how to activate them!"

Olivia had already charged into the fray, rushing Grau in a full-body tackle. I think he was surprised the little kid had the guts to try to take him on—but she and I both knew that as long as I had the talismans, nothing Grau could possibly do would permanently harm her. She charged with reckless abandon, shouting at the top of her lungs. Grau almost dropped Alden in surprise.

" _Zelas Fang!"_ Olivia finished her one-two punch with her signature spell. This time, she'd managed to target Grau's hands. As Olivia swooped in to catch Alden, she locked eyes with me. " _Now_! Repeat after me! Holy Gods of the four worlds…"

" _Holy gods of the four world_ s," I repeated, hastily donning the talismans.

" _What?!"_ Grau snapped his head up in disbelief.

"On thy bonds, I do swear…"

" _On thy bonds, I do swear…"_

In a panic, Grau began his rapid-fire attacks again. This time, Olivia threw up a wind barrier of her own, doubling the effects of the one already in place. His attacks bounced off harmlessly, and a few even bounced back to hit him, puncturing the priest's clothing.

"Grant me all the power you possess!"

" _Grant me all the power you possess!"_

Having fully powered up the talismans, I moved on to the main course. (I don't think I've ever said a spell so fast in my life.) Then—

" _Holy Crusader!"_

This time, thanks to the amplification process, the spell was operating at almost the same level as when I'd seen Magnus do it. It took out the remaining walls of the empty castle, encasing Grau and blasting his physical body apart.

"Is he dead yet?" Alden choked out as Macrius healed him.

"Almost. I think," Olivia was still on high alert, watching the area where Grau was last standing. "That's his true form." The Mazoku staggered out from the wreckage. The once-chiseled features of his face had vanished, and his arms and legs no longer adhered to the rules of physics, stretching and morphing as he shambled toward us. A dark miasma emanated from his body and swirled out in every direction.

So _this_ was the true face of the bastard who'd single-handedly toppled the monarchy and destroyed two of my friends. I felt my blood boil at the mere thought of it.

"I'm gonna finish him off," I swallowed, "or die trying."

"And how exactly are you gonna do _that_?" my brother panicked. "That's a raw, untamed Mazoku! You've gotta be crazy."

"Maybe not. I think I've figured it out," I said, glancing at the Queen's damaged portrait.

"Figured _what_ out?" Alden shot back.

" _Adrift Upon the Sea of Chao_ s," I muttered.

"Uh, _what?!_ " Alden nearly fell over. "This isn't really a good time to be interpreting artwork, sis!" his hands flew to his head as Grau ambled towards us.

"Not that! I mean—the missing Chaos Words. I think I've got them now," I breathed.

"You mean…?" Macrius began, dumbfounded.

The woman in the painting at Zerramond Manor; the portrait of the Eternal Queen in the throne room—they were of the same person. The face of the Eternal Queen—a face Flare Dragon Ceiphied had chosen for itself when it took on the form of the Water Dragon King. A face that had sunken into the Sea of Chaos over a thousand years ago upon its defeat, and had miraculously been reborn, only to return again to nothingness.

The woman in the picture wasn't the Lord of Nightmares; she couldn't have been. The Lord of Nightmares was the void itself, formless and all-consuming. The original interpretation had been correct, then. Serin Renfried had painted the Water Dragon King. It was the missing piece of the puzzle, the part of Ceiphied that had disappeared. The title of the painting was a clue to completing Flare Dragon's spell.

"Of course," Ellerin's eyes widened. "Why didn't I realize…?"

"I'm not really sure what's going on here, but are you ready to take this guy out?" Alden asked nervously.

"Human!" Ellie shouted. "Take the Holy Sword. Channel the spell through its blade. Calibren was forged in the flames of the Earth Dragon King—it is meant to be used with Lord Ceiphied's power."

"For real?" Alden stood agape.

Olivia nodded. "Do it, Big Sis!" she clenched her fists, steeling herself for whatever came next.

I took the sword, fired up the talismans, and began the spell. But this time...

" _Thou who art more brilliant than dawn,_

 _Thou who dwells in crimson flames,_

 _Scattered to the four corners of the Earth;_

 _Adrift upon the Sea of Chaos."_

This time, I could beat him. The dark mass all around what was left of Rasche Grau began to quiver. I charged ahead, sinking Calibren's blade into the flesh of the greater demon as I finished the spell.

" _Heed my call, and destroy those who would bring about destruction._

 _Become my ally and deliver your swift vengeance."_

Calibren glowed from pommel to point with a power I'd never seen before. Its aura surrounded my body as I channeled both my will and the spell into the sword.

 _The time of salvation is at hand!"_

" _Holy Crusader!"_

The force of a complete Holy Crusader flowed directly into Grau's body, tearing him apart from the inside. With an otherworldly scream, he vanished from the face of the earth, never to be seen again.

I sank to my knees, sword in hand, and smiled.

... you can go ahead and file _that_ under _Talia's Most Epic Adventures._


	5. Epilogue and Afterword

**Epilogue**

* * *

' _W_ _ell done, young paladin. I hope we shall meet again.'_ I'd heard a voice on the wind right before I'd collapsed from exhaustion after the battle. It sounded familiar, but it was still bothering me that I couldn't quite place it.

"Mail call!" The chipper sound of Miss Bermont, the healer's aide, interrupted my thoughts. "Here's one for you, little lady," she smiled as she handed me a plain envelope with my name scrawled sloppily across the fold.

"Whatcha got there? A love letter?" Lantz craned his neck (which was an impressive feat, given his neck brace) to sneak a peek at my mail from his hospital bed on the opposite side of the room.

"Butt out, will ya? It's from a friend," I rolled my eyes. It was bad enough that they were going to make me stay in the infirmary to run tests, but sharing a room with _this_ nosy bozo was driving me up a tree. _Why couldn't Aunt Luna have gone a little bit easier on him?_ I frowned as I turned the letter over in my hands and unfolded it.

 _Dear Big Sis,_

 _Thanks for everything the other day._

 _I'm going on a journey with Xelloss for a while._

 _He destroyed Grandpa's manuscript so that no more bad guys will try to take it._

 _You can keep my talismans for a little longer. I know you'll take good care of them._

 _I just have one favor to ask you._

 _Please don't tell Big Bro about my secret._

 _If he finds out I'm really an old lady, he might not want to play with me anymore._

 _Okay, that's it for now. I'll write to you again._

 _Get well soon!_

 _Love,_

 _The Great Sorcerer Zerramond_

Olivia...was she going to be okay traveling around with that shady priest? Given everything we'd just been through, I decided to give her the benefit of the doubt. I felt a little sorry for my brother, though. He was probably going to miss the little pipsqueak.

"Wish somebody'd write to _me_ ," Lantz pouted, smoothing our his goatee. "Hey, nurse! Can we get some more ice cream in here?" he added, ready to drown his sorrows in another bowl of Rum Raisin. It was the closest thing they had to actual rum in this place.

"It's a hospital, not a restaurant!" I snapped. "And you're lucky Auntie's footing your bill," I pointed out. "She doesn't do that for just _any_ challenger, you know."

"Huh. Really?" Lantz scratched his nose.

I nodded in reply. It _was_ true. Either Lantz's persistence had gotten her attention, or she just felt bad for him because he was so pathetic. My money was on the latter of the two possibilities, though.

"So you think I've still got a chance with her?" Lantz asked brightly.

"Let's not get crazy here, okay?" I rolled my eyes.

A great clamor rose up in the hallway, interrupting our conversation. I could make out a couple of familiar voices. My heart leapt up in my chest.

"Come _on,_ Mom _,_ it was a _really_ hard battle! There were like, seven—maybe even _eight_ Mazoku Lords out for our blood! I'm _totally_ traumatized!"

"I don't care _how_ many there were. I don't care if you had to fight Shabranigdu—you are _not_ getting a puppy."

"Aw, c'mon already! Back me up here, sis," Alden pleaded as he skulked into the room, an irritated Mom trailing behind him. Her face instantly brightened when she saw me sitting up in bed, though.

"Hey, you're awake," she grinned, plopping down into the visitor's bench next to my bed. "How ya doing, kiddo? Heard you tore Dynast Grausherra's priest a new one," she added. "Not sure why you decided to go ahead and do it in pink pajamas, but hey," she shrugged, "to each her own."

Lantz and Alden both stifled a hearty chuckle. I scowled and pulled the covers up to my mouth.

"Get out, Mom. You're embarrassing me," I muttered into the blanket.

"Oh?" Mom fluttered her eyelashes at me. "Well, if _that's_ how you feel about it, fine. I guess I'll go ahead and eat these grilled cheese sandwiches all by myself then…" she heaved a big, fake sigh, looking longingly at the picnic hamper under her arm.

 _Damn it, she knows my weakness! Time to eat my words so I can eat these sandwiches._

"No, wait! I didn't mean it!" I tugged on Mom's mantle as she very slowly and _very_ deliberately pretended to get up to leave. "You can stay," I grunted.

"That's what I thought," Mom tucked a stray piece of copper-colored hair behind her ear and tossed me a sandwich.

Alden and Lantz busied themselves with a game of checkers while I devoured the grilled cheese. It tasted like home. It was so good, I could feel my eyes welling up. But I fought the urge to cry and just ate like I'd never eaten before.

Mom studied me carefully as I stuffed my face. She folded her arms across her chest and scrunched up her mouth, looking a little more lost in thought than usual.

"Hey," she finally said, placing a sympathetic hand on my head. "Are you okay?"

I tried to get a read on her expression. It wasn't a look of pity. It was a look of understanding.

"Not really," I admitted, leaning back against the cool pillows behind me. "I just had the worst week of my entire life."

"You wanna talk about it?" Mom lifted her hand and sat back in her chair.

 _No. Yes. I don't know._ A million thoughts were going a million miles an hour inside my head. I couldn't forget the way Blanche had smiled at me at the end of her life. Or Grau's cold, empty laugh. I still felt angry about how Rivera had manipulated us. I was anxious as to why Xelloss had refused to get involved with Grau, who should have been his ally. And most of all, I couldn't stop worrying about what would come next. What was going to happen to Zephilia...to the world? Shabranigdu was still out there, and for all I knew, he could be thawing out faster than ever now that the Eternal Queen was really gone.

"Where do I even go from here?" I wondered aloud as a few stray tears stained my sheets. "What am I supposed to do? I watched people die...and I…"

I'd killed people, too. But I didn't want to say it out loud.

"I'm not a normal girl anymore, am I."

It was a statement, not a question. "I can't go back to the way things were, now that I know what's going on out there. But…" I trailed off, looking directly at Mom for the first time in a while. "I'm not Auntie. I'm not you, either. I'll _never_ be like you. I'm just...not that good. So what do I do now?"

Mom's face softened. It seemed like she was choosing her words carefully. "Nobody's asking you to be me. You wouldn't _want_ to be me, trust me," she smiled ironically. "It's a headache and a half. But you _are_ going to have to find your own path. You need to keep moving forward."

I swallowed hard and nodded uneasily. Mom continued.

"That being said...it's not going to happen all at once. You're only human. Take it a day at a time. And right now...the battle's over. So if you need to cry...it's okay. You can cry," she finished, pulling a handkerchief out of her mantle to wipe my face.

So, just for a little while...I cried.

* * *

Those quiet moments didn't last long. They never do.

By sunset, the hospital room was starting to feel crowded. Mom, Dad, and Alden fought for a spot on the visitor's bench and talked excitedly over each other. Auntie stood in the corner, a new sword gleaming in her hands. The nurse shot us a glare, but didn't dare say anything. (At least Auntie had the courtesy to leave Spot at home this time around.)

As Dad and Alden played rock-paper-scissors for the last sandwich, Mom dropped something into my hands and winked. "Oh yeah, I almost forgot—ta-daa!"

It was clearly a jeweled amulet of pretty high quality. I looked at it quizzically. "Huh?"

"It's an original work of art by yours truly!" Mom grinned from ear to ear. "Since you're family and all, I'll sell it to you for half price. Whaddaya say?"

 _Yeah right! I'd have to wait tables for a year to afford this thing!_

The room went quiet. Everyone gave Mom the stink eye.

"...what, can't anybody in this family take a joke?" Mom brushed off the tension. "It's a present. You can have it."

"No strings attached?" I raised an eyebrow suspiciously.

"Nope! You earned it. I mean...pulling that Holy spell out of your butt at the last minute? And then figuring out the right Chaos Words at the eleventh hour? That was pretty cool," Mom replied.

"Yeah, I'm a little bit fuzzy on the details," Dad leaned back in his seat, "but it sounds like you really fought your way out of a tough spot, huh?"

Besides…" Mom cut in emphatically "any sorceress worth her salt has one of these things. It's an absolute necessity."

"I got one too," Alden puffed out his chest, looking as if he'd just won the lottery.

"I have a gift for you as well," Auntie smiled vaguely as she handed my brother and I two crisp white slips of paper.

"What're these?" Alden asked, deflating. (I think he'd still somehow been expecting a puppy.)

"Your work schedules for next week," she said simply.

"Aw, man!" Alden whined.

"Also, it's clear to me that you require further training. I expect _all_ of you to work even harder from now on," Auntie said pointedly. Her eyes fell on Lantz, who flushed.

" _Yes ma'am,_ " Lantz and Alden mumbled in unison.

Just then, another wave of visitors burst into the room.

"Human!" Ellie shouted at the top of her lungs by way of introduction. "It is I, Ellerin of Emerald Village!"

"We know who you are," Alden interjected. Ellie paid him no mind.

"I have come once again to lay claim to the Holy Sword, Calibren! What say you?" she pointed at me with swift ferocity.

"You still can't have it," I rolled my eyes.

"Very well! Then I shall come to ask you again tomorrow!" the Dark Elf thundered and whipped around to leave dramatically. But something—or rather, some _one_ —caught her by the arm as she attempted her exit.

"Hold it," Mac said wearily. "We're not done yet, remember? We need to complete the report—"

"Ah, yes. It is as you say, assistant," Ellie stroked her chin thoughtfully. She turned back to me. "As Interim Chairwoman of the Zephiel City Sorcerer's Guild, it is my duty to gather data on the incidents which occurred in connection with the explosion at the Royal Palace…"

"You blew up a palace?!" Dad winced, looking at me. Mom put a hand on his shoulder.

"Well…" I chewed my lip, "Only partially."

"You _partially_ blew up a palace?" Dad turned pale.

"Look, let me start at the beginning, okay?" I sighed. Mac readied his quill as Ellerin fished around in her bag for some parchment.

"I sure hope you brought a lot of paper," Alden quipped.

I took a deep breath and started talking.

In the end, even though I'd left out a few things that needed to be kept a secret, it still took nearly two hours and about fifteen scrolls to make a proper record of the events leading up to Grau's death. My voice felt hoarse and my head felt heavy.

"I see," Mom said as Macrius dotted his i's and crossed his t's under Ellie's watchful supervision. My parents exchanged meaningful looks. "Well, if that's the case…"

"Guess we're gonna have to hit the road again soon, huh, Lina?"

"My thoughts exactly. I mean, it's not like I'm itching for a fight or anything, but if we don't take care of this business with the Mazoku, then who will?"

"Yeah," Dad cleaned out the inside of his ear with his pinky finger, "I'm not sure I entirely understood any of that, but hey—if Xelloss is involved, then something's _definitely_ up."

Leave it to Dad to dispense with the details and get to the heart of things.

Mom looked a little peeved at Dad's oversimplification of the matter, but she let it go. "You got that right, at least," she folded her arms apprehensively. "Guess we'll have to hit up the Sorcerer's Guild and see if Zerramond left any clues behind. And then...well, who knows? Maybe there's some treasure out there with my name on it," she cheered herself up a bit with that last part. Dad ruffled her hair.

"Like, not to break up your second honeymoon or whatever, but aren't you guys too old for this sort of thing?" Alden wrinkled his nose.

"I'm thirty-five, not dead!" Mom snapped at him. "Besides, it sure beats the hell out of doing your laundry."

"But who's gonna feed Kitty and Goldy?" Alden protested.

"Oh, that? We asked the fishmonger's kid to take care of the house while we're away. What was his name again…?" Dad scratched his chin. Mom winked at me. I wanted to sink into the floor.

"Well…" Alden hesitated, "can I come, too?"

"It's a hundred years too early for you kids to tag along!" Mom sputtered like a volcano. Then, calmly, she added, "Finish your training. _Then_ we'll talk."

"You know, you've both grown up a lot, though," Dad said.

"Yeah. That was really something you kids did back there," Lantz looked at us with newfound respect.

I looked at Lantz with newfound irritation. _Now that I_ really _think about it, the whole reason I got mixed up in this mess was because of that sword stunt_ you _cooked up to get Auntie's attention! You're in for a world of hurt if you don't help me with my chores after all that..._

"Yes, they are both quite extraordinary young people," Mac flashed my parents a look of mixed apprehension and respect. "Although after spending some time with the two of you, I'm not at all surprised."

"Yeah," Lantz agreed with a hearty laugh, "You wouldn't _believe_ some of the crazy scrapes _these_ two have gotten out of," he grinned wryly.

"You don't even know the half of it, buddy," Mom shook her head.

"As Interim Chairwoman of the Sorcerer's Guild, I demand to know the details of these scrapes!" Ellerin stood up excitedly. "...for research purposes, of course," she added, blushing.

"Well, if you insist," Mom shrugged, but she had that look on her face. The one she gets right before she launches into one of her long, drawn-out tales of yore.

"Oh boy," I smiled in spite of myself, leaning back against the bedpost. "We're gonna be here a while."

"Here we go again," Alden put his hands behind his head.

"Yup," Dad settled into his chair.

Mom cleared her throat, stood up, and began her story.

"So there I was, tearing through the woods at top speed, a gang of murderous bandits hot on my tail…"

* * *

 **Afterword**

* * *

Author, Stephanie Snyder: **A**

Author's Unofficial Spokeswoman: **L**

L's Minion, Shabranigdu: **S**

 **A** : It's finally here! After 325 days, I've finished my very own novel!

 **L** : A very unoriginal novel, I might add.

 **A** : Look, I just _really_ love The Slayers, okay?! I originally wrote this to entertain my sister on a long train ride between Yamanashi and Tokyo, but just because I did it for fun doesn't mean I didn't take it seriously. I did tons of research.

 **L** : While you could have been doing other things...like your chores...not to mention you're moving to another state in a few days...

 **A** : Er, well, you know...all that aside...I thought there was still a story waiting to be told in the world of _Slayers_ , given all the details put forth in the original books, plus information from interviews with Mr. Kanzaka and so on...

 **L** : Speaking of _that_ useless guy...he said he wasn't going to write any more novels in the main _Slayers_ series, but…

 **A** : After 18 long years, he's picking it up again, right? It's really exciting! Although…

 **L** : Although…?

 **A** : I'm secretly a little bit worried...that the new story arc will create inconsistencies with this one I just wrote…

(Whack! Smack!)

 **A** : What the—?! Where'd you get that shovel?

 **L** : Don't worry about it. You already shoehorned in a lot of rules about magic that didn't exist...and created too many new characters…

 **A** : B-but they're believable and make things interesting...right?

(Silence)

(Then, from somewhere far off in the distance…)

 **S** : Sniffle...hic...my cute, darling granddaughter, Olivia...I sure hope she'll be all right…

 **L** : Pull it together, Minion S! She's not even canonical! And at least _you_ got to make an appearance in the story...even though it _was_ only in a flashback…

 **A** : Since we're on the subject, I really enjoyed writing about the details of the Demon War. I'd like to write more about it in the future…

 **L** : Like you'll have time to write another full-length fan novel!

 **A** : We'll see. If people like the story, I wouldn't mind writing more. You can tell me what you'd like to see in the next novel via Discord! My handle is Steph#6085.

 **L** : Or you could send a PM to ME, the glorious L! Just address it to the author's FF account.

 **A:** That's um...why do you get to use _my_ inbox?

(Thwack!)

 **A** : I mean...never mind! You can use it, too. Ha ha ha..

 **L** : Look, before we leave our readers to the go about the rest of their lives—all two of them—do you mind answering some questions that they probably have?

 **A** : Yeah, okay, I guess so…just...put the shovel down, please?

 **L** : Request denied.

 **A** : Sigh…

 **L** : Anyway, if you were going to write a Slayers novel that's over 50,000 words long, why couldn't you have made _me_ the main character?

 **A** : Err...I don't think I could do you justice. You're a _very_ complex character.

 **L** : That's a blatant lie, but I'll let it pass! But seriously, the main character here is a novice sorceress/swordswoman/waitress...do you really think that was a good move?

 **A** : Well...as a novice author, I thought it might be better off to start with a novice character…

 **L** : At least you admit to that.

 **A** : But besides that, I also think that it allows for more character growth and development over the course of the story. There's something compelling to me about a character living in the shadow of her famous parents, trying to make her own way in the world…

 **L** : So you say, but I'm way more sold on the fact that you're still just a novice yourself.

 **A** : In my very first draft, the heroine could have ostensibly been Lina. But another reason Talia stepped in to fill the role of the main character is that I needed the story to take place far enough in the future that a number of things relevant to the plot could have reasonably happened…

 **L** : Like the possibility of a second Demon War and the development of Holy Magic, right?

 **A:** Exactly. And the migration of people from outside the former barrier lands. So I needed someone a little younger to be the heroine this time.

 **L** : But then at the end of the story, Lina and Gourry departed on an adventure anyway…

 **A** : Err...don't think too hard about it.

 **L** : And what was up with you hardly mentioning their names?!

 **A** : Well...from a kid's perspective...your parents are always just 'Mom' and 'Dad,' you know?

 **L** : I actually don't…

 **A** : Oh. Right. Oh well. That's my explanation and I'm sticking to it.

 **L** : I think that's about all the time we have for now. Just give us a quick preview for next time and let's go.

 **A** : Okay! In the next story, Talia will experience the joy of her first period!

 **L** : Ugh, Sorry I asked.

 **A** : Well, it would mean she'd need to rely more heavily on her sword, right? Though it's still technically Luna's. Speaking of the Holy Sword, Calibren, there are still a few mysteries about it that need to be solved. Also, the gang meets up with a bounty hunter who has a gambling addiction and has to fight a bunch of zombie soldiers. Finally, will Alden, the Thief of Justice, ever get a puppy?! Find out in the next volume! (Maybe. If I live that long.)

 **L** : Okay, that's a wrap! Thanks for reading.

From the Author's Unofficial Representative

With Deepest Gratitude,

 **L** (bowing politely.)


End file.
